I’m currently on Paxil, Vraylar, Qelbree and lithium carbonate. I talked to my psychiatrist about adding melatonin. But the pharmacy was out of melatonin last time I was there- and I need to take a bus to get the pharmacy from this crappy apartment.
Kayaker I’ve been thinking about this. My day doesn’t seem to have a high point. I slog through one day to make it to the grind of the next. Only weekends seem to hold any pleasure. I feel like i’m barely keeping my head above water.
Boy, you need to address that. Other than feeding our dogs, there’s also my enjoyment of cannabis. I don’t know if it would fit in with all the fancy mood altering drugs you take already, though.
I agree with you and @wolfpup that pets can be magical for the spirit. Yes, they are an added chore but they more than worth the effort.
That said, if getting a pet is not possible for whatever reason, go to the dog park. Some dogs will come and say hello to you.
Also, you (general “you”) can go to an animal shelter and play with the cats and dogs. The shelter likes it and allows it. They can’t give the attention needed to all the animals so are happy to let visitors come and play with them (of course, check with the shelter to be sure but that is my experience).
More broadly, consider volunteering for something in your community. Whatever that is (need not be pets…whatever you like). Anything to get you out and about and get your mind on other things than depression.
Also, check out Meetup.com. Sounds like a dating website but it isn’t. It is a place to find people in your area doing things you might want to be a part of. Or, you can make your own Meetup group for something you enjoy.
The main goal is to do stuff so you have less time to dwell on being unhappy (and you feel better at the end of the day and have stories to share with the GF and family).
When my gf’s dad died she was feeling really low. She asked me for my friend Norm’s cellphone number, and I gave it to her. He breeds golden retrievers. She messaged to see if she could stop out for a visit. She spent a few hours hanging out with two litters of puppies. It really recharged her.
FREE PET!! 
How do you know it was not an old one that had a face-lift? 
RE Pets
I cannot afford a dog or a cat. I don’t have room for one either. My current apartment is essentially one room and I work from home.
While petting other people’s pets always cheers me up, I worry I would bond with a pet at the shelter and be crushed that I could not adopt it.
RE Meetup
I don’t own a car or have a license. The local bus routes suck. I don’t know that I’d be able to get to a meetup.
I also don’t know if I have the time. I work til at least 5pm (sometimes calls go later. The latest I’ve been on a call was 7pm). I go to bed at 10. I am very thankful I work from home and don’t need to commute.
How possible/practical is it for you to go outside and take a (maybe longish) walk – ideally, somewhere interesting or pretty?
Endorphins are a thing – nature’s antidepressants.
What things can you identify in your life that generally worked as your go-to pick-me-ups? Are any of those still accessible to you?
Are you a reader? Enjoy music? Feel better after you’ve really cleaned the apartment? Like to cook? Have a favorite meal that doesn’t break the budget?
Some Meetups are online so maybe one of those would work.
Do you like D&D? There are online groups for that too (can be hit and miss though…some groups charge money for it too…not a lot usually).
This seems to be a thread where you are okay with advice. You’re going through a really hard time. A lot of people in your situation would find it really difficult.
I think it could be helpful if you had things you looked forward to every day. I don’t mean huge things. A cup of tea. A book. Time to meditate. Try to make it special. Your special things you get to do every day. Lean on ritual.
I’m saying this because I recently made a major turn into self-care in response to last year’s stressful chaos. It has opened up my life in ways I didn’t expect. My things are not going to be your things. But I’ve been doing these things: meditation, daily walk, stretching, reading, drinking tea, burning candles, journaling, taking baths, time away from screens. I put special care into my morning and bedtime routines. And never underestimate the power of a good cheese.
And if you have never played Stardew Valley which someone mentioned upthread, that’s a great place to start. That game is like being wrapped in a warm hug.
I do think with your feeling of isolation you’re going to need to find more people you can lean on. Maybe you can find a Meetup of people who share a common interest.
I think the nature of life is that it’s usually difficult in some way. There’s gotta be some way of breaking through the sense of helplessness and despair to create meaning. I strongly recommend you look into Acceptance and Commitment Therapy if you aren’t already doing it. If money is a concern I will ship you the best ACT workbook I have. Just PM me.
I’m concerned that you are clinically depressed. We all are down from time to time, but you indicated that this has been going on for months. I don’t know what your employment situation is or that, even if you are employed, whether or not you have any kind of health insurance. If you do, it might also cover mental health at least to some extent. If so, I suggest you seek out professional help.
The OP did say they’re seeing a therapist, and that they are on various medications under the care of a psychiatrist.
You might want to look into Zlooptee, Giptelex, and Hwagnifil.
It would probably be cheering getting a job supervising the monkey with a cup full of Scrabble tiles that names drugs.
Ah, thanks! I only read the OP.
I will add, as a general note, when depressed saying “no” is all too easy. No matter what options exist, even as basic as getting outside for a walk, it is all too easy to decide not to do it.
One thing is sure, nothing will change if nothing is changed (I’m copyrighting that). As @Spice_Weasel said, “My things are not going to be your things.”
You need to find your things. That alone can be a fun and interesting process.
So, since you’ve mentioned things that you’ve tried, and things that aren’t really options right now, I’m going to go with a few you haven’t mentioned, and try to avoid things I’ve thought of that don’t work for your exact situation.
One - being stuck in an apartment you didn’t want to be in, where you work and live 24/7, and with a mountain of stuff you would otherwise have to work on (unpacking) is probably going to make things worse. So, I’ll add to those who say get out and do something, whether it be a walk, finding a local park, or taking the crappy bus to someplace nearby but out of the house. Being stuck in there endlessly is absolutely going to make it worse when you don’t have your normal level of emotionally support.
Having said this, yeah, easy if you have transportation, not so easy if you don’t. Since local public transport sucks, is getting a bike from goodwill or the like going to be an option to give you a little better transportation? Because no reason to buy a new bike if you don’t know if it’s going to work out at all.
But assuming getting out of the house is too much work for how you feel right now, the next step is to find something fun that doesn’t require unboxing all your stuff and going someplace.
So, what works for me (and of course YMMV) in increasing order of required energy and expense:
Read that one funny blog / article / author / online entity that you always chuckle at. Small, tiny, bite sized things you don’t have to commit to reading a whole book or even comic for. For me, it might be a classic Dave Barry column, or a Seanbaby article, or reading about the time Tony Bourdain ate fermented shark. Tiny bits!
Same thing but a bit more time commitment: we live in a golden age of free(ish) shows and movies that you can stream online. Using Tony again (and he comes to mind readily when talking about depression and consequences, so please read this as concern!) I was able to rewatch the first two seasons of No Reservations streaming from the Travel Channel without a sub. Or try to find that old cartoon that no one else remembers (for cause) on Youtube - Starblazers, Adventurers of the Galaxy Rangers, and similar familiar but unimportant niche stuff is always fun for me.
Shop! It’s nor for everyone, but when I was last working really late, and often getting stuck with OT, I promised myself that I’d spend the funds from that 30 minutes of OT on something for ME. Logged into Amazon and bought something from my wishlist. Sometimes just looking for things was fun, and then I’d get to look forward to it being delivered. Something like a small Lego kit can be fun, because it was shop - anticipate - then assemble, a three-fer.
Similarly, sometimes just having something fun (not even good, but FUN) to eat can help. We are equally in a golden (in the meaning it takes a pile of GOLD) age for delivery food. Yeah, it’s an expense, but for me, the local hole in the wall chinese place still does it’s own deliveries for a small surcharge on orders of $35 or more. Order a lot, have takeout for a few days, and drown your sorrows in comfort food.
Give yourself that little something to look forward too.
And always feel free to vent.
Absolute truth. When you’re depressed anything can seem like a Herculean task.
What can be helpful for me is identifying the absolute smallest step necessary to complete a task until it’s doable. To go for a walk, I have to get up from the couch. All I have to do is get up from the couch. Okay, I did that. Maybe that’s all I do today. Maybe it took all my effort to stand up. But maybe standing up, with time, becomes so automatic that it no longer requires effort on the part of my brain. So after three weeks of becoming an expert at standing up, I pick the next step. Eventually you get to the actual walk.
Some days in the mornings even though I’m not currently dealing with depression I still don’t want to go outside, so I bribe myself with podcasts.
Getting out of depression when you’re really stuck down deep is often not about doing a thing one time and then feeling better. It’s the repeated long term effects of multiple changes in your life that eventually makes you more psychologically resilient. But that can feel overwhelming. So we start with just standing up.
You are on a deathwatch. Own it. My mom had a circle of friends who deliberately called each other for that exact reason. I often called my mom and toward the end of her life made routine stops to check on her. It’s not a secret we’re all going to die. I’d hate to think she fell and nobody found out for days while she suffered in pain while lying in her own excrement.
As to your need for cheering up you might be able to help the process. Unless you’re clinically depressed and in need of medication there is a great deal of mental calisthenics we can do to keep in shape. I have my go-to movies that cheer me up. I have friends to turn to for a night out of frivolity. I can go hiking or take a ride in a car or a motorcycle.
You’re GF’s brother cannot keep his children away from her forever. The worst he can do is alienate his children from himself which will drive them closer to her when they become adults. She has the luxury of nurturing them as best she can to help them on their journey. She can give them things they will remember and learn from such as a book on origami.
You’re mouse is an easy problem. take a box like a cereal box and place a mouse trap in it baited with peanut butter. Put it against a wall near where you saw it. They travel along the perimeter areas. I usually catch time in 24 hrs.
Cheer up and indulge in some Walter Mitty fantasy. Imagine shoving your mouse up your GF’s brother’s ass while yelling “Willard lives”.
I don’t even know these people and it makes me happy.
Anyway, @DocCathode, I’ve been lurking as I’m sure others are. Who couldn’t use some cheering up in these difficult times? You’ve done us all a service by starting this thread. Lots of good advice here. I’ll just say that I go to the gym with my husband most weeks. Even though I don’t need to lose weight, and I don’t intend to work hard enough to gain muscle, and I find it ridiculously boring. I just do it, and then I get some kind of mental Brownie points. It’s no doubt beneficial physically also.