I just had a piece of Dove chocolate, and read the “fortune” inside the foil.
Damn. Out of the mouths of babes, sucklings, and mass-produced candy wrappers.
Does this work like Chinese fortune cookies where you read the fortune and go:
<snerk> IN BED! <snerk>
You know, I consider myself to be generally mature and well-mannered, but I can’t read a fortune cookie without doing that, and giggling inanely the whole time. Simple pleasures, I guess.
Thanks a lot, swampy – since what I need to stop thinking about is getting dumped by my most recent beau. 
We had Chinese take-out for dinner last night, and --surprise,surprise-- when I broke open my Pastry of Precognition* it did contain an actual fortune, to wit, “You will soon reach a place of contentment.”
More typically, the so-called fortunes are merely gratuitous pieces of character analysis or advice.
*Pastry of Precognition = Fortune Cookie.
I once got a fortune cookie that said
Adding “in bed” to the end of that one just makes it weirder.
“in bed” <snerk>
::giggles hopelessly::
Okay first, Pastry of Precognition = Band name! Yes I want royalties.
As for the OP, one of the sagest pieces of advice I’ve ever recieved I got from a Dove wrapper. It said (and I quote),
Clearly, whomever writes the inside of these wrappers is 1) doing a kickass job, and 2) someone we should be following around for whatever insights we can glean.
So? Being in bed alone isn’t always bad… I… ok, I’ll shut up… 
A place of contentment in bed? That should definitely be hopeful giggling.
Maybe it’s Homer Simpson. If I ever find one that tells me I’m going to find love on flag day, I’ll let you know.
The alternative to “in bed”, of course is “without any pants”.
Okay, I just came in here to lament the fact that the best fortune I’ve ever gotten doesn’t work when you add “in bed”.
“You are doomed to be happy in wedlock in bed” just does not sound cool.
However, “You are doomed to be happy in wedlock without any pants” just had me cracking up. That’s great. I’m going to have to start using “without any pants” instead of “in bed”.
Oh, I forgot to mention. The other alternative to “in bed” is “with children.” Let’s see what you can do with that one.
Somehow I never get a fortune or character analysis. I get pieces of mass produced wisdom that are meant to be revered, not deciphered.
“A leaf always falls flat”.
in bed?