I tend to "grow" when I get in water...

[czarcaztic]

I’ve noticed that my penis gets longer when I’m in a pool. Normally, I’m a “one fister with a bit of room left over”, but when I get in the pool, I become a definite “two fister”. My girlfriend is the one that really noticed this first.

Any explanation?

[ivan_astikov]

Hee hee hee! He said ‘penis’!

[panache45]

@czarcaztic

My girlfriend is the one that really noticed this first.

If you’re in the water with your girlfriend, and she’s measuring your penis, that may explain the growth.

[Dilton_Doiley_Philosopher_King]

It grows? “Like an angry turtle!”

Srsly: What is the water temperature? Do your testicles retract or protract?

[Cuckoorex]

deleted because it was rude

[WF_Tomba]

Try swimming with the old people and see if it still happens.

[Fake_Tales_of_San_Francisco]

I’m putting my money on Optical Illusion Caused By Pool Surface Ripples. :rolleyes:

[Tangent]

It’s called an erection.

[Chronos]

I’m putting my money on Optical Illusion Caused By Pool Surface Ripples.

That was my first thought, but given that he’s using “fists” as his unit of length, I suspect that the measurement is being made tactilely, not optically.

[Chief_Pedant]

@Chronos

That was my first thought, but given that he’s using “fists” as his unit of length, I suspect that the measurement is being made tactilely, not optically.

But if he’s touching himself to take the measurement, would not the Observer’s Paradox account for the length difference? (Assuming the Package works correctly when it’s cuddled tenderly in a fist.)

[billfish678]

Schrodenger’s Penisdox?

[Really_Not_All_That_Bright]

Penile equivalent of pruney skin?

[notfrommensa]

Maybe hand shrinkage?

[Really_Not_All_That_Bright]

@notfrommensa

Maybe hand shrinkage?

goes off to get Q-tips to remove coffee from nooks and crannies on keyboard

[MOIDALIZE]

ATTN: Internet

I HAEV BIG PENiS

[Mr.Slant]

WAG: Your body increases blood volume and blood flow in an effort to regulate the temperature, and keep your dong from freezing off.

[The_Second_Stone]

Maybe it’s your fists that are shrinking. Ever think of that?

[Tangent]

@The_Second_Stone

Ever think of that?

notfrommensa thought of that just four posts ago.

[Chronos]

But if he’s touching himself to take the measurement, would not the Observer’s Paradox account for the length difference?

Not if the other experimental variables are kept consistent. When he takes his penis in hand while on dry land, it takes only a little more than one hand to do the job, but when he does the same, with presumably all else being equal other than the immersion in water, it takes two hands. So apparently the water is making a difference somehow.

Then, too, while the size of the penis does respond to measurement, it does not do so instantaneously. It seems that it should take long enough that one could get a very good sense of its size in both the flaccid and turgid states.

[Antigen]

@Chronos

Not if the other experimental variables are kept consistent. When he takes his penis in hand while on dry land, it takes only a little more than one hand to do the job, but when he does the same, with presumably all else being equal other than the immersion in water, it takes two hands. So apparently the water is making a difference somehow.

Then, too, while the size of the penis does respond to measurement, it does not do so instantaneously. It seems that it should take long enough that one could get a very good sense of its size in both the flaccid and turgid states.

This. This is the sort of stuff that makes me love this place.