I’ve decided, based on the input I’ve received here, to let this go for the time being. I hadn’t really considered that he might not appreciate his mother being so involved in this with him (if he really is going through it), but now I see that I should just let him figure it out for himself, but know that I’m still here and will be.
Thanks for all your replies, and I’m sorry if I offended anyone with my squeamishness about gay sex. If it turns out he is gay, I’ll definitely accept it and I’ll be happy that he had the courage to come out. If he’s not gay, that’s great too. Maybe I’ll update you all in a couple of years with some news!