I thought I was a newbie, but Noooo!

Hnag on! I’ve got a lighter, and I could swear that I saw a handle of cheap vodka around here somehwere! Alright, I got it! Now; Malatov coctail, or fire breathing?

Wait a minute! Listen to this, guys!
:opens door a crack:

GRONK!

SQUELCH!

GRONK!

SQUELCH!

GRONK!

SQUELCH!

GRONK! SQUELCH! GRONK! SQUELCH! GRONK! SQUELCH!

Are they making out in there?

Is it safe to come out of hiding yet?

::Cautiously and slowly cracks the door open::

GRONKQUACKSQUISH!!!

::Slams door again::

Damn.