I won't apologize for not being a princess

The BBQ Pit
1

Tonight we have to go to the in-law’s to celebrate the New Year.I am dreading it because I have to again face my mother-in-law,the Queen Bevvie and possibly my sister-in-law,Princess Jessica.I am not like them.I do not enjoy stamping things with other little rubber doodads.I don’t enjoy making my own holiday/birthday cards with cardstock and some glitter.I don’t hang out at the local craft store,stocking up on silk flowers and second-hand old bridal lace.I am not more concerned about the state of my six-year-old,extremely out-of-date wardrobe than I am about the state the US in right now.I do not bitch and whine about how only extrmely skinny people look good in such and such outfits.I do not drive an SUV.I am not a princess.I have a real job(or I did until Barnes and Noble let me go).I like black,not fluffy,frilly pastels that make me look sickly.I am not tan.I am pale and I like being pale.I don’t enjoy dressing up.I prefer ratty old jeans from Target,not some trumped up,over priced junk from Macy’s or whatever. I wear real teeshirts,with real logos on them,not short sleeved,scoop-necked things that are pretending to be teeshirts.I like reading comic books,not Good Housekeeping or Martha Stewart Living.I am not a princess.I was not raised with a silver spoon in my mouth like Queen Bevvie and Princess Jessica.I realize that I am NOT what Queen Bevvie wanted for Prince Corvette Guy.I am not a society butterfly.I am not thin.I am not a peppy little cheerleader.I am the gothic anti-cheerleader.I just wish that after nearly a decade of being together those two would realize that and get over it. King CorvetteLover(fatherinlaw)has and I love him for it.CrownPrince HunterGuy(Princess Jessica’s husband)has and he’s a blast to hang out with.Prince CorvetteGuy obviously knew what he wanted so stop throwing it in my face that he should’ve married so-and-so from blahblahblah. I am SICK of it…I will never be what you want me to be.I can only be myself.

IDBB

2

Does PrinceCorvetteGuy stand up for you when the Queen and Princess make snide comments?

The answer to this question is most important.

If it’s yes, then ignore the Queen and Princess.

If it’s no, then it’s time for a little chat with PCG.

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[King Coherence] Two spaces after a period, please. [/King Coherence]

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First, so you understnd that I sympathize with you, let me relate that I never shave anything, never wear makeup, dress only in solid, drab colors, have no pictures in my house, have exacetly one knick knack, buy everything except for food off of the internet, and got married in the courthouse and announced it afterwards by email. My wedding band is stainless steel and is the only piece of jewelry I own. And I have two princess sister-in-laws–I mean, tasteful knickknacks and silverware you can’t wash in the dishwasher. I feel your pain. It’s like there is this whole complicated language, this horrid, complicated code about things that they expect you to know and you don’t, not becasue you are stupid but simply because you don’t care and can’t imagene wanting to care.

Now then, they feel the same way about you. There’s all this stuff that is important to you, that really matters to you, and they don’t know a thing about it, only that it exisits. They know you are judging them, but they don’t understand the standards you are using. They don’t even begin to understand why you want to care about the things you care about.

Here’s the kicker. The way they look at the world is no better than the way you look at the world. But your way isn’t better than theirs, either. It’s just different. It’s not your place to decide what things are worth worrying about for everybody, how everybody should chose to be. It’s not your place to decide which lifestyles are worth living. And you don’t have to understand who they are in order to accept who they are and to appriciate who they are on their own terms.

Yes, you can say that they are petty bitches who don’t accept you on your own terms, so why should you accept them? Well, because if your gonna stay with your husband, then your stuck with them, so you might as well make the best of it.

I don’t like high-art bitter dramas, but my husband loves them, so I am stuck watching one or two a year. At first I spent a lot of time noticing how they lacked the things I like in a movie–like humor and explosions. Then I learned to pay attention to what the movies were trying to accomplish and they became much more tolerable, even if they still aren’t something I would chose to watch if I didn’t have to.

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Congratulations on knowing who you are and being exactly that! Consider accepting the same trait in your in-laws.

Celebrate diversity!

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I’d just like to say that Manda JO kicks ass.

Also, King Coherence has Divine Right, by gum. Long live the King!

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Well, I was taught that, but I learned to type on an actual typewriter. These days, the rule is supposedly one space, the reason I’ve heard being that typewriters used fixed width fonts, and computers tend to use proportional ones, and for some arcane typesetting reason, this actually makes a difference.

(I still habitually do two, though.)

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Bren_Cameron is right, you only need one space when using proportional fonts.

–friedo, the used-to-be school-newspaper layout artist.

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And, of course, most bulletin boards compress white space so 2 spaces after a period become one when viewing the HML. There’s no excuse for no spaces, though. It’s as egregious as habitually mistyping a simple definite article.

BTW, I wholeheartedly second the idea that Mand Jo rocks. I appreciate the OPs need ot blow off steam, and I am in no way condemning this thread or questioning her judgments of the things which truly matter to her in-laws, but as Manda Jo observes, that’s the game and she’s already entered her ante. Time now to play the cards.

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Manda Jo
What is your one knick knack?

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A vase: I got it for Christmas and intend to use it to hold flowers I buy at the grocery store.

12

Anyone else hear Tyler Durden in their heads while reading the OP?

These people remind me of a friend of mine’s parents. Hell, their own child doesn’t behave like they do, so I don’t hold out much hope of them accepting all her friends. Try to just find a way to tolerate them and move on. If you show them that their attitude doesn’t affect you, eventually they give up.

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Hehehe. I wear real teeshits that have holes and sweatstains in the armpits.

Seriously though, I know it feels to be the odd ball. My solution: run away from home and never look back.

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Or a two-letter function word.

I sure hope that was a real application of Gaudere’s Law and not intentional.

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IDBB, I’m sorry that your in-laws aren’t treating you right. Like it or not, you are a part of their family now, and you do deserve respect.

But just because someone likes crafts and pastels does not make them shallow, stupid, or a princess. My fiance’s sister is an Oprah-watching, crafty-craft making, domestic goddess. Not much like me. But she’s kind and thoughtful and smart. I’m glad she’s going to be my sister-in-law. It sounds like you’re judging your in-laws just as much as they’re judging you. A subscription to Martha Stewart Living does not a Stepford Wife make.

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Sounds to me like you are just as much of a princess - just from a different country.

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Yeah, I was like that in high school. Then I grew up. I’m now a well adjusted, crafty-yet-politically savvy, pierced and tattooed married mom-to-be. (And yes, I know, you hate kids.)
People are different. If you learn to accept those differences, you’ll get along with them, and you’ll probably find that they get along with you a lot better. Instead of spending time bitching about what you don’t have in common, figure out what you do.

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post compressed:

people hate me because I am diffrent…

god damn it I hate them because they are diffrent

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I love my FIL…I can stand to be around him and BIL CrownPrince HunterGuy. They and CG are the ONLY reason’s I can stand to be around the Queen and her Princess during the holidays. My loyal and loving Prince CG stands up for me and the Queen and her Princess wouldn’t dream of making a snide remark to my face, although I’m sure they are thinking them. Call me paranoid. Call me a freak. Call me Tyler Durden for all I care. :slight_smile: I am not like them and I am sure the Queen was disappointed when CG married me and we had a very simple wedding that didn’t cost 15 grand(like the Princess’s).
Oy…the joys of family.

IDBB

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Maybe you are a little paranoid. They don’t make snide remarks, but you are still sure that they are thinking them? How?