And if I don’t want to clap my hands? What are you going to do, make me? Who put you in charge here, anyway?
Well, I was born Jewish, and I consider my HERITAGE Jewish, but I’m not religious at all. I only go to synagogue for funerals and bar mitzvahs. Do I count?
If it helps I remember the 4 questions song.
I’m a quarter Jewish. It never really made a difference to me or other people until most of my friends ended up being Jewish and asked me about it initially. I’m agnostic in belief though.
Jewish dad and Catholic mum.
Dad’s family always chastizes me for not knowing enough about my heritage, but since Dad marryied a goy I’m not sure if it’s mine. I look very Jewish, but also somewhat Spanish and Italian FWIW.
Who put me in charge? Who put ME in CHARGE? Who put Moses in charge? You think he just thought a four decade jaunt through the desert would be a nice afternoon stroll? You think he just had a surplus of bloody frogs with lice boils? It’s liquidation days at Jews-R-Us and everything must go!
Who put me in charge? You think Abraham just woke up one days and said “look, all these idols are well and good, but I’m really looking for the abridged version.” Think Sarah thought the best way to celebrate her 90th birthday was to give birth?
Who put me in charge? Hey, who put Jesus in charge? Wait, bad example. Who put Jacob in charge? Honestly, even people in the 70s didn’t use rainbow knitted leisure suits as a fashion statement.
So who did put me in charge? It Is The One Who Is Who He Is When He’s Being Himself. And you will know his name is the Lord when he lays his smackdown upon thee!
Shabbos Goy is an custom that, interestingly, many prominent Americans have been a part of. Here is a short list:
Secretary of State Colin Powell
Attorney General John Ashcroft’s mother
Former Governor Mario Cuomo
Author and Editor Pete Hamill (who wrote a wonderful novel, “Snow in August,” based partially on the experience)
:::clap clap:::
According to my step-mother, though, I’m a self-hating Jew. What, just because I don’t think a bookshelf of mezzuzahs is artwork? Or because I don’t like all the Judaica on our mantle? (It’s ugly, okay?) I might also be a J.A.P. 