Mike Tyson has completely lost control. In fact, I’d argue that he never had much control at all. But his 38-second “performace” on Saturday was too much. Before he dropped this charming zinger on current champ Lennox Lewis, he polished off another chump and, almost, a clearly terrified referee.
Then the best part, the post match speech to Jim Gray, in which he compared himself to Jack Dempsey and Sonny Liston. Gray looked like he was watching coyotes dine on the queen mother. Jim wanted to tell him that Sonny Liston had 2AM shit squirts bigger than Mike Tyson, but he was too much of a professional. And anyone who makes Jim Gray look like a calm, collected professional is a fucking lunatic.
I say, while we still have the chance, don’t let this clearly dangerous human being back into the country. Stop him at Laguardia, and just turn him around. Smack him on the head for good measure. Let him spend a few weeks apart from his cheering section and let him realize that he’s done, and nobody cares anymore. Let him tell Pierre or Sven how he’s going to eat Lennox Lewis’ fingernails and spit them into his nostrils and pick the boogers of his grandmothers cats. I for one couldn’t give a rabbit shit about your act, Iron Mike, all praise due to Mohammed. Go get another tatoo and calm the fuck down.
I only heard a snippet while doing someting else, but didn’t he follow up the ripping the heart out and eating the children diatribe with a “praise Allah?” Somehow that just doesn’t seem to fit.
Although, bonus points to Iron Mike for stringing together quite a few long sentences. That impressed me much more than his boxing abilities.
A man that makes his living legally knocking the living shit out of anybody with the balls to get in the ring with him beats the goat fletching snot out of some tomato can so quickly that he doesn’t burn off any of the adrenaline that he worked up pre-fight is interviewed and issues a challenge to an individual he wishes to fight next using such a colorful term as “I’ll eat your children” and you have a problem with it? How else would you suggest he try to provoke Lewis? Say “Pretty Please”?
Can he be compared to the greats? I think so, but only with making allowances, just like when you compare Tiger to Hogan, Arnold, or Jack. He’s no Sonny Liston. He’s no Jack Dempsey. He’s no George Forman. He’s no Ali. He’s Tyson. He is one of the greatest in the ring. Outside the ring, he’s not, but that’s what you get when you train men to be boxers. And a lot of it has to do with the death of Cuss and Tyson joining up with Don King.
As far as not letting him back into the country, that’s just an assinine comment that I won’t even address. And if you really want him smacked upside his head, I invite you to go for it sometime.
Yes, you got it. Good recap. But add this: a man who has an established history of flagrantly disregarding the rules of his sport and occasionally engaging in illegal activity, sometimes within the bounds of the ring, once again shows his willingness to ignore the rules, even in a bout he was nearly guaranteed to win. He then uses his victory to deliver a ridiculously over-the-top and asinine (note the spelling) mishmash of a verbal assault, which would be almost funny if it didn’t come from the mouth of a thug, a vicitimizer and a felon.
I can’t argue that Tyson is a bad fighter. I can argue that he is dangerous and with his unlimited resources and with no checks on his behavior it is only a matter of time before he really does some harm. I can argue that his little manifesto on Saturday is yet more evidence of a severly disturbed mind being carried around by a massive and dangerous body. One day, someone will look at him funny by accident (or slap him on his way through customs) and that person will die. I can argue that I’m tired of him, and I prefer the bravado of Ali to the snarling of a junkyard dog.
Gentlemen, I salute each and every one of you. I haven’t snarfed up iced tea all over my keyboard in quite some time, and I thank you all for it. If I may quote some gems:
“As you all know, I love a good toddler as much as the next guy-” George smiles and rubs his ample midsection"-but those little suckers are just so high in fat! Finally, there’s a solution…"
Throw him in Ultimate Fighting. Try to bite an ear off and they’ll break his fucking leg. I like Tyson though, he is one crazy son of a bitch, but stupid. He is dangerous cause he is stupid.
Yep. In fact, he already has. Remember this guy served for 3 or so years as a convicted rapist and for another three months last year for beating on some motorists. It’s not like this guy might cause trouble, it’s that he actively causes trouble. And those are only the things of which he’s been convicted.
