I'm tired of making stupid mistakes and fuck my cats!

The BBQ Pit
1

So my cats whenever they are displeased piss on things. Now it is possible to control it but it’s a delicate balancing act. Don’t change the litter? They piss. Leave pants on the floor? They piss. Well today they got locked in my office and guess what? They pissed on my fucking computer. Some of it got inside and dripped on my GTX285 Video card, and guess what? I didn’t register it properly and so I have to buy a new one outright.

In addition to that the baby broke my iPhone. Though I didn’t do anything stupid there.

2

Well I think it would be a mistake to even try to fuck your cat.

3

Might teach it not to piss on the computer.

4

There’s an app for that.

5

Why were you letting the baby use your phone?

6

You don’t happen to have a dog named Chunks, do you? :smiley:

7

I wasn’t at the time, though I let her talk to her grandparents and stuff. She broke it by taking it none too gently off the charger while it was charging in my bedroom.

8

You see I knew apple chargers were a mistake waiting to happen. Any other charger subjected to the same treatment will just go ‘plonk’ and there is unlikely to be any damage.

9

This thread reminds me of an old saying,

Hide the wife and grease the cats ass! It’s party time!

Can’t remember where I heard it, though.

Probably best I don’t even try.

10

They should register for the SDMB. They’d fit right in.

11

Zing! Take that, us!

12

They “got locked” in your office? Hmmm… Munchausen much?

13

I was sort of wondering how a person could mistakenly fuck a cat, no matter how stupid that person was - let alone more than one. :wink:

14

I accidentally my cat: is this bad?

15

The whole cat?

16

Once a philosopher; twice a pervert.

17

Your cats can turn doorknobs?

18

I’m a dog person. I thought cats were supposed to be smart. (I was just kidding, by the way.)

19

A then its either:

A) Three times a Lady…
B) Hi Opal!

or, of course:

C) Profit!

Sorry - laughing my head off right now while in the Salt Lake City Airport using the wireless. The nice lady next to keeps looking over as the tears of laughter stream down my face.

20

When I get up with the baby in the morning I close the doors of rooms I don’t want her to go into. Oftentimes the cats are in one. This isn’t a problem if I don’t fall asleep and forget to open the door until the afternoon and my wife doesn’t either because she’d still prefer to keep the baby out of the office.