You stupid cat, what the hell is wrong with you??

Bloody hell, PC, you’ve lived here nearly 12 months. You’re over a year old, you have children of your own. And you’re the stupidest cat ever. TWICE I’ve caught you sleeping on the kitchen table today - and you act like you had no idea you’re not allowed up there. Grrr!! What does it take to make you learn?

This combined with your incessant begging for food EVEN WHEN YOUR BOWL IS FULL is about to drive me over the edge. What the hell is wrong with you?

I think that your cat knows one of my bunnies and they’re in collusion.

I’ll catch him with a mouth full of fern, and he acts surprised when I yell at him.

My guess is this activity is meant to drive you insane, which is their job. My favorite is the old: “Thank you for feeding and playing with me. In appreciation for this I present you with some disgusting dead thing I killed and/or dragged out of the ditch.”

Jesus Cazzle, can’t you just understand that the cat is trying to train you. Duh. Why shouldn’t the moggy wash her arse on the table? You’ve got other furniture you can use surely?

You might want to worm her though if she is constantly begging for food. Oh and clean your table thoroughly.

cazzle she’s trying to piss you off so that you’ll send her to live with Farkle.

Um, Cazzle, what does ‘PC’ stand for? It certainly wouldn’t be Perfect Cat, or Pleasant Creature by the sounds of it.

I don’t know what’s dumber: the fact that there are so many useless-ass “listen to me bitch about my kitty-cat” threads in this forum ALL THE TIME, or that so many people take the time to respond to them.

DOH! Wait a second…

Maybe it stands for Pussy Cat. Or Phucking Cat.

Phelching Cat?

When I was a little lass, we were adopted by a large tabby-and-white moggy. My mum referred to him as “That blessed cat” when he first began to hang out in the garage. Little three year old me picked up on this (good job she didn’t call him “That fuckweasel cat”) and Blessed Cat (BC for short) remained his name until the day he died, fifteen years later.

First, let me say I didn’t name the damn cat. She arrived with the most ridiculous and pointless name ever - PC. For psycho cat. Now, this cat is stupid and annoying and STUPID (and also cute and sweet and stupid), but she’s no psycho, so right there the name sucks. Then there’s the whole PC for politically correct or personal computer angle - somehow her previous owner had never heard of any of these things and thought PC was a totally unique letter combination :rolleyes: I HATE the name PC (knowing we’re geeks, everyone laughs because they think we named our cat after computers - now we may be lame, but we’re not that lame), and so I call the cat “Peace” when I like her.

Right now, PC is driving me bananas. She has been wormed (though I plan to do it again anyway), and what’s annoying me most is she will walk away from a bowl full of food to beg for food. What the hell is that all about? She stops eating to cry for food! Stupid cat!!

She’s not going to train me to let her on the table - at this rate, she’s training me to kick her to the moon. Arrrgh!

cazzle. I can appriate your problem.
The darn cat dosn’t answer when you call, so what does a name matter?To save yourself a bit of embarrasment, change it…LOL
Why does PC beg, even with a full bowl? Because what you are eating is waaaay better than the kibble.I can assume you feed her table scraps or food whilst you or other humans are eating themselves otherwise she would not have this behavior.
To 86 this annoying habbit of hers, STOP feeding her table scraps, or human food of ANY kind. Eventually, and it by no means will be soon, she will learn that food time for people does not mean food time for her. We have 3 darlings ourselves, and thier silly bums WAIT untill we are finished eating to get thier bites. I’ve done my fair share of nose thumping for them to get the message, and the young ones are learning, but it takes time.Oldster Jake dosn’t bother me much whilst I eat.They do learn. it just takes a hell of alot of time, patience, and consistancy on your as well as anyone who might feed the cat, but they will learn.

As for the laying on the table problem, anytime you catch her doing that, or any other behaviour you wish to eradicate, go for the squirt bottle. It teaches them, not only that you are not happy with thier behavior, but gives you a chance to practice your aim. Nothing is more satisfying than soaking a bad kitty!

Remember, these are training tips, and with any kind of training, YOU MUST be PATIENT and CONSISTANT. My prayers are with you

I second Telconstar’s advice. I’ve fed my cats human food maybe five times ever, and the last three times, they turned their nose up at it. They wouldn’t eat salmon, ferchrissake.

And while I’ve not completely convinced them not to get up on the table, they know by now that they’re not supposed to: I can just glare at them and they’ll leap off the table and go running. Squirt bottles rock!

But consistency is absolutely vital. Every single person in the house has to agree to train the cat in the same way, or else it won’t work.


She’s not begging for table scraps - we don’t ever give her table scraps. And she’s not doing this when I’m eating - she’s doing it from the time I get up in the morning, until I go to bed in the evening. Every time I walk through the house, she’s running along beside me, yelling “Food! Food! Feed me!” (luckily, I took a course in “Speaking Feline 101” so I know that’s what she’s saying). I’m not doing anything to encourage this behaviour, no scraps, no treats. So far all her begging has achieved is me yelling myself hoarse.

As for the table thing… she’s lived here nearly 12 months. She has been taught not to get on the table. Yet somehow she “forgets” every few months, and starts all over again. I can’t believe she got BACK on the table after she got yelled at the first time! The squirt bottle is once again loaded and ready for action. I think I probably should squirt her whenever she begs for food too. It might teach her to shut up. Am I going to have to retrain this cat every couple of months for life?

Her previous owner has a lot to answer for. I think PC took one too many blows to the head in her first home.

[Paula Poundstone’s cat] No, no; I was just getting down. Because wasn’t it you who told me just the other day that you didn’t want me up here. No, don’t even come over; I’ll do it myself. [/Paula Poundstone’s cat]

You have to be kidding reprise, you have seen the meldope pics, you think my bathtub has room for me, kaboodle and yet another cat!

Yes, Cazzle, you think you have problems, kaboodle has taken up swimming. I think too much squirt bottle training is at fault. Beware.

Good luck in retraining.

(sincere voice) Cazzle, I sense that you’re fighting your cat. Trust you cat. Go with your cat and move into the zone your cat is trying to take you into. Flow into the oness with Cat, the Catness of the world the - (transmission broken off)

I hope PC doesn’t take up swimming. My only revenge is bathing her - technically she needs baths anyway, plus she hates them. Bwahahaha.

cazzle, you got it all wrong… she has not lived with you for 12 months… YOU have lived with her for 12 months!!! As soon as she came in, it was her house, her table and you are her humans… that’s how it was explained to me when i was almost taken away by little white men after a few months with my cat… they own you and your house :stuck_out_tongue:

I want more pics of the cazkitties!

I have no insights as to WHY PC is doing this, other than my fallback position of “Cats is weird.”