I’ll second Paris Hilton, but I can’t understand how anyone finds Ann Coulter hot, with that stringy, boney face and neck.
Michelle Malkin, OTOH, would be just fine, as long as the only talking she did would be to beg me to do whatever it was I wanted to do with her next, and to thank me for it afterwards.
I apologize profusely Skald. I misread your post.
Ditto. I think that Russell Crowe is the finest hunk of man-meat ever to waltz out of the Southern Hemisphere. People say, “Omigod, did you see Russell Crowe on [talk show]?” and I’m like, “STOP! Shut. Up. Now.” I stick my fingers in my ears and go “NANANANANANANANA” because I do not want to know anything about his real life. I’m never, ever, every going to meet him and there is absolutely nothing to be gained by knowing anything about him.
Apparently, he threw a phone at somebody at some point. And I cannot emphasize enough how much really I don’t care.
I’m not in lurve with the actual Russell Crowe, I am in lurve with my mental image of Russell Crowe, and my mental image is kind to puppies and intense and deep and has a thing for brainy astrophysicists, and my goal is to protect that mental image from contamination by any and all real-life information.
Seconded.
Also Britney.
I can’t put my finger on it. Somehow she strikes me as neither particularly intelligent nor likely to be skilled or enthusiastic.
Did you ever see Monster’s Ball?
I know it’s just a movie, but it’ll at least help you change your mind. 
You think Coulter’s Nazi tendencies are CLOSET?
I don’t know about Marfan’s syndrome, though, 'cause I don’t know what that is. Share with me your wisdom.
I just had to thank you, Skald, for making my day with this one. 
Yep, Kelly’s got to be at the top of that list. The few times I’ve seen the R&K show, I’ve felt the overpowering urge to shout “Shut up. Shut UP. SHUT THE FUCK UP. SHUT HE FUCK UP NOW, YOU SPASTIC PIXIE-WHORE!”
And occasionally, she is shutting up, and I’m like “mmmmmmm”.
Fran Drescher
and a second for Kelly and Halle.
Bizarrely enough, this is especially true when she’s in profile. I don’t know hy, but I just llllooovvveee her profile. Particularly the chin.
'Course I notice odd body parts. I’m fond of Jewel’s collarbones, for instance.
Closet? Only the actual uniform and the Swastika flag she salutes to.
Marfan’s? Google, bro. Coulter makes the late Robert Wadlow look positively petite.
Okay, the flag bit was a bit over the top. Let’s change that to her signed photo from Uncle Adolph.
Better?
Don’t be silly. Everybody knows that Skalds only existed during Viking times, and thus are obviously unable to use the Internet.
Have you seen him in Brotherhood? I’m not sure what kind of character he plays, but it’s a 10 o’clock show so maybe he’ll get some semi-nude action.
I liked him in Friends With Money.
Deites assist me … Keanu Reeves. Preferably if he didn’t talk at all.
Dharma and/or Greg. Jenna Elfman is the female Tom Cruise, and Thomas Gibson is a one-note actor, but I consider both of them hot.
[Austin Powers]It’s a MAN, baby![/Austin Powers]
Jennifer Love Hewitt. Wicked cute, but I don’t know if she has two brain cells to rub together.
I liked him a lot in Of Love and Human Remains. It sealed his hotness for me.
