I can’t help it, this thread really makes me laugh.
Starguard, I really think you should get yourself checked out by a doctor. I’m pretty sure that it isn’t sex that is affecting your health.
Noticed that the people with higher post counts are the ones getting less sex…
Starguard, fuck yourself to death and die a happy happy happy man, sure it’s not possible but it’s worth a try isn’t it 
Heh, that could be reworked into a fine pickup-line. “do me! I dont want cancer!!”
Live longer, pay more taxes.