I’m looking in the office fridge for fruit, when my eyes begin to sting. The only thing I’m really allergic to is mold, so on a hunch I head over to the sink, and there it is. One mug, placed there at some point today (it was not there when I came in in the morning). In the bottom of it is some kind of beverage remnant, and mold. Green, furry mold. I shudder, then open the cubbord and confirm the worst is true. All the mugs are gone.
You see, my boss has a problem.
He likes tea. He drinks 3/4 of a mug of tea, then leaves the mug. . .somewhere. . .with a layer of milk & tea in the bottom. It eventually grows mold, and then I or someone else finds it. Somewhere in 6,000 square feet of office space are 5 more mugs, used and left about at some point prior to New Years. They’re out there, and I must find them.
I confirm Mug #1 was found by one of my other bosses, who returned from vacation to find it in his office, with no idea how it got there. Now the hunt begins. Mug 2 is on the credenza in the conference room. Mugs 3 & 4 are in his office. (One on the second shelf of his bookcase, the other inside a wall mounted bin—some days I’m lucky and all 6 are in his office). Mug 5 proves difficult. By this point one of our IT guys and the VP who found Mug 1 have joined the search.
It’s behind the printer. No, I don’t know why.
I check the spare offices. The storage room (I’ve found them in there). IT Guy wanders off to check the server room and mutter about homicide if he finds moldy tea in there. All the cubes. Outside on the veranda. One mug is still missing. Where is it? What will it look like when I do find it? Is it going to grow legs and come sit in on board meetings?
The other mugs are soaking. IT Guy goes and gets me Claratin, because my eyes are all red and watery, nose stuffed, throat scratchy. It helps, as does the Jamba Juice he brings back with it.
Why oh why are some men so disgusting? Why is it SO hard to empty out your used mug and put it in the sink? This is an office, not a place for you to have science experiments and torment my allergies. Arrrrgh. Grrrrr.