It's time for... The 2001 Putz Awards!

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

It’s time for some self-congratulatory auto-adulation! Yes, folks, I’m proposing the 2001 maybe-annual Putz awards. Awards for posters who have achieved excellence of whatever sort in categories which have as of yet to be determined.

Here’s the plan. First of all, this thread, where we can discuss the categories in which to present awards, and where we can determine technical details like the judging and nomination processes, and whatever else might come up.

Once we’ve nailed down the categories, and the voting process, and the judges, we’ll start the voting. Then there will be the awards thread… virtual limousines, imaginary tuxedos, and scandalous nonexistent gowns, as well as presentations of awards, of course.

Sound like fun?

Here are a few ideas for voting categories:

Best Comedy OP
Best Dramatic OP
Best Thread Concept
Best One-Liner
Best Obscure Subreference

And, the coveted… Best Poster, 2001

Sound good? If so, let me know what you want to add. Don’t like it? What should be changed?

And… this may be a big undertaking. I’m going to need help. If you have the time and the inclination, please volunteer here as well.

And now, for the Disclaimer

This contest is in no way, shape or form endorsed, sponsored, or upheld by the Straight Dope column, the Chicago Reader, or any personnel associated therewith. It isn’t “official”, “exclusive”, or even “coherent”. The administrators of the boards were consulted before this contest was launched, and have agreed that it can take place, as long as it is understood that the contest is solely the responsibility of its creator, (me. Hi!) the participants and volunteers that make it possible, and some guy named Ralph, off the coast of South Dakota. Understood? Good.

2

It’s obvious the award should be"The Wally"…what else could it be…

Keith

3

Who would do the voting? If we opened a thread, we’d have to set a specific stop-voting date to be able to count. And there’s going to be a plethora of nominations.

Maybe there should be a nomination thread first. The top nominees would then be announced and the voting thread would be opened. Just a suggestion.

Also, what threads are eligible? What would the time period be for the OPs?

As for catagories, along with what you’ve listed, I say we go with the best by forum vote. And I’d have to shy away from a Best Poster vote, unless people can agree on some criteria for eligible posters to meet. Otherwise, it’s just another popularity contest.

4

This may be a bit over-ambitious, but can I be the MC of the ceremony? I’m just as cheesy as Billy Crystal, and at least TWICE as shameless!

If that’s a bit too ambitious, then I’ll be happy to just help organize stuff, and help out wherever you need anything.

Oh, and I think that I have to agree with Crunchy about the “Best Poster” award. There doesn’t seem to be too much of a way for that to work without being completely popularity-based, but if somebody can think up honest-to-God criteria, then I’d be all for it!

As to time period, I think we should at the very least limit it to posts made in 2000. I vote that we open up a nomination thread (stupid frog stealin all my ideas…), and cut it off after about a week or two, and then have a commitee of people without lives (c’mon, you know there are more like me out there) pick the winners.

That’s about all the input I have at the moment, though. E-mail me if you need any organizational help or whatnot. Great idea, man, and I hope it all works out!

-Walt

5

I have something I want to nominate. Oh, Jester does too. Where do we go?

6

Oh! I volunteer to be an Acadamy Member! I have no life! Just the SDMB and baseball.

7

Wow. Okay.

The Wally it is. And for a theme song, we can use a subtle retooling of Catalani’s La Wally…

Crunchy Frog had a bunch of good suggestions.

Who would do the voting?.

Any SDMB members.

** If we opened a thread, we’d have to set a specific stop-voting date to be able to count. And there’s going to be a plethora of nominations.**

I agree. And I hope for plethora.
**Maybe there should be a nomination thread first. The top nominees would then be announced and the voting thread would be opened. Just a suggestion. **

Not just a suggestion, that’s the plan. Once we’ve gotten categories nailed down, we’ll set up a thread for nominations, and then once the nominations are finalized, we’ll be doing a web page to vote for your choices. Also, you’ll be able to submit entry forms through email.

**Also, what threads are eligible? What would the time period be for the OPs? **

I’m thinking any OP’s dated April 1, 2000 - April 30, 2001.

Thanks, Crunchy Frog. Great input.

Do you have a head shot? A resume? How about an audition?

Heck, I don’t even know how we’re doing the ceremony yet. But have your people get in touch with my people, and let me know where my people are these days.

If nobody else wants it, and there is an MC, then the job is yours.

Well, they don’t have this quibble about the Best Actor award at the Oscars…

We do need a Big Finish for the awards ceremony. And I know it would be a popularity contest, but hey, that’s kinda what this is about. If you can suggest criteria, go right for it.

Noplace yet. But if you have a category to suggest, please do so here. Nominations will come when we have a set of categories nailed down.

Thanks for your support on this, everyone. I think it’s gonna be fun.

8

Hmmm…

I see the pros and cons to a Best Poster, and I tend to see the cons winning. For a big finish maybe a Best Mod deal? It at least narrows the playing field to a group of all totally well deserving people so it would be pretty exciting. I know I’d have to think pretty hard to just pick one.

Other than that, sounds great! I’ll even wear heels.

9

oooh ooooh pick me pick me…I’ve always wanted to be a member of some kind of academy…

Maybe each board should have its own criteria (sp?). An IMHO OP could be amazing, how do you compare it to a blistering OP rant in the Pit?

but count me in, I’ll shower and everything!

10

I am forced to agree with this.

I suspect that “Best Poster” or any other singular award, has the potential to cause more hurt feelings than “warm fuzzies”. I’d respectfully suggest that any positive citations be more directed towards threads and collaborative, rather than individual, efforts. Particularly when there is no shortage of popularity based threads in IMHO or MPSIMS.

And this comes from someone who has had his fair share of plaudits, so this isn’t “sour grapes” talking.

[sub]Unless y’all were planning to vote for me, than never mind all this.

Kidding![/sub]

11

Some category suggestions:

Best flirt
Best hug
Best signature
Best use of vB code
Funniest typo
Least appropriate thread title
Best use of a part of anatomy (male/female) in a thread title

12

My suggestions for categories:

Best in-joke:
Worst in-joke:
Most-referred-to in-joke:
Best use of a Simpsons reference:
Best hijack:
Worst hijack:
Most long-winded poster:

13

What a hard-on idea Mr Visible!

I seem to recall the original academy awards were set up to encourage an improvement in motion pictures (although just how Janet Gaynor’s performance in Seventh Heaven improved anything is beyond me).

Maybe we could let this be a kind of benchmark when trying to decide what to go for. Some joke categories would be good fun but we could maybe aim at a few awards that affirm the special qualities of this Board.

Which I think of as intelligence; wit; open-mindedness; a commitment to seeking the truth above all, based on evidence (and thus fighting you-know-what); and finally, the willingness to examine our life today in all its variety.

A panel of moderators could affirm best posters on this basis for men and for women (not really because of sexual differences, but to allow two bites of the cherry). And I think, nominate The Thread that best represents the Straight Dope. Best Thread.

Of course any contest means you have losers, and sore losers at that, so you’all better brace yourselves.

Two other points. The frocks! Can people please go to some trouble with their frocks. And no borrowing jewellery for the night. be a Good Doper and steal it instead.

And finally, can we have a moment when the stage goes dark, there’s a drum roll, a huge piece of scenery flies up into the air and there is revealed a shrivelled-up little old man in a wheel chair. As one, the audience rise to their feet to applaud … you know very well who, but I’m scared to say…

And since you now know what a coward I am, no awards for mods to avoid months of horrible Pit threads afterwards on the subject of retribution.

RedbOscar[sub]copyright[/sub]

14

I don’t know, SPOOFE, unless you want these nominations to end up in the Pit…I’m not sure it would be such a hot idea to have “worst” anything.

15

More category suggestions:

Best satire/parody
Best comedy song/poem
Best rant
Best username

16

Longest Thread
Troll of the Year
Most Hated Poster
Moderator/Admin of the Year
Most Annoying Thread Category
Best Link Ever Discovered via SDMB
Cecil Adams Lifetime Achievement Award

17

I’m certain we don’t need to vote on this. The hands-down champ absolutely has to be “All Your Base …”

18

Will the awards be open for just the calendar year (2001) or for the whole past year (May 2000 - May 2001)? Just curious. This is a great idea!

My ideas for categories:
Newbie of the Year
Best User Profile
Best Dopefest (group award)
The Renaissance Poster Award (someone who posts knowledgeably to a wide range of topics)
Best Pit Rant

This oughtta be fun!

19

I wuz robbed.

20

Who robbed you, Sua? Show 'em to me, I’ll kick some ass.

Which reminds me, I need to book security for the ceremony… Scylla, you available?

Okay, on to the next round of questions…

The Best Poster controversy continues. I’m still torn on the issue, and would like to see people weigh in on either side. Give reasons you like it, reasons you don’t.

Whatever we decide, I think Redboss’ Best Thread idea is now in the lead as the Big Capping Event of the Evening of Stars. Should we include, say, Best Poster for individual forums? Best Pit Ranter, Best Mundane and Pointless Poster? Let the debate rage on…

For Medea’s Child’s Best Mod idea… I was thinking about maybe an overall Mod tribute. You know, with maybe a dance number, a film clip of some highlights… But I don’t know whether Best Mod is going to be picking from too small a pool of people to avoid too much offense. Chip in on this debate, too, if you would.

I like all the categories suggested so far, and I’m keeping a list. I’ll post the list when it looks like things are winding towards a close here, and we can eliminate any that don’t meet with enough approval.

Next, I want to start talking over one technical point. The voting.

I see two possible ways of doing it. First, we can simply get the categories and the nominees together, and every member of the SDMB gets to vote. Tres demotcratique.

Secondly, we set up an Academy (The Putz Academy) to evaluate the nominees.

I’m open to any other suggestions as well. What do you think about the different methods? This needs to be debated into the ground, and I think all you Dopers out there are up to the task.

Oh, and as to dates, I think April 1 2000-April 1 2001 sounds awfully appropriate as limits to the dates on the OPs being considered.

For you volunteers, as soon as things get a bit firmer, there’ll be plenty of stuff to farm out. Keep in mind, we’re going to need presenters for all these categories. And a way of organizing the awards thread. And bouncers. And valet parking. And caterers, how could I have forgotten the caterers…

Keep the suggestions coming, the categories piling up, bring up any issues you see developing, and debate the things that need debating. I want this to be a reflection of the SDMB, in all its odd glory, and the way to achieve that is to get as many people to pitch in as possible.

Oh, and Redboss… if you think this is a hard-on idea, you should see some of my other ones…