I need a swift kick right in the rear.
Sorry , but we’re too busy studying our belly button lint to kick you in the rear. Besides we all know you would enjoy it and then you would ask everyday. 
(whoosh) (splat)
So, uh, what did you do that you need a swift kick in the rear? Something really, really, really bad? :D:D
It is a ssssshhhhhh kind of thing. You understand. SEXUAL! HE HE.
Hmm . . . I don’t know if we can administer beatings without knowing why . . .
I don’t kick. However, should you ever need a spanking…
PLEASE? I’ve been very, very bad. SPANK ME DADDY.
WAIT! I didn’ t mean that. Don’t spank me daddy. On the other hand, I DO deserve it. It would only be the right thing to do. Don’t use the belt daddy. Use the cat of nine tales. I deserve it. (purrs softly)
Did you have fun being naughty? thats what counts that you had fun!! so kick kick
And I thought this was going to be some kind of juicy confession or something! Sounds to me like you’re just bragging!
No kickin’ or spankin’ from me 'til I hear the story!
Oohhh, she thinks she deserves the cat 'o nine tails! I’m with 2nd Law, I’m gonna have to hear the story before I can oblige. The whip only comes out in extreme situations, so don’t leave out any details. After all, if I whip Chris without proper documentation, everybody will want one.
Sorry Chris, but you’ll have to make an appointment first.
All you people with your stinking scruples . . . we don’t need no stinking appointment!
Chris, come on over to my private spanking room. I’ll make you sorry you ever did whatever the hell it was you did.
In the future, just email me if you need to be spanked. Don’t bother with this messy thread . . . you’d be surprised how many perverts there are in here.
Very well!
You shall receive a good spanking!
And then…The Oral Sex!
How’s about midnight?
I shall call YOU master Just this time ! 
