Jackass judge sues dry cleaner for $65 million over lost pants

The BBQ Pit
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Roy Pearson, an administrative law judge in D.C., is suing a dry cleaner for $65 MILLION for losing a pair of his pants. That’s right - $65 MILLION! This is so ridiculous. This jackass judge, with way too much time on his hands, is costing this immigrant family who owns the dry cleaning business scores of thousands of dollars to defend this suit.

Read all about it in today’s Marc Fisher column in the Washington Post.

To summarize…

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Please please please…can we get a judge to go :dubious: :rolleyes: , bang his gavel, and say “Case dismissed!”

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Exactly. What I, and everyone else who was in Marc Fisher’s live online chat today, cannot understand is how this lawsuit has not been dismissed, or how this judge has not been somehow admonished by the city or the bar.

You know what though? Somehow, I am not at all surprised that this sort of thing is happening in D.C. It is a very very strange city.

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Ya know, maybe they were really nice pants. Like the kind that feel really comfortable and look great as well. Ladies; the kind of pants that make your ass look fantastic. Pants like that.

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[QUOTE=vetbridge]
Ya know, maybe they were really nice pants. Like the kind that feel really comfortable and look great as well. Ladies; the kind of pants that make your ass look fantastic. Pants like that.
[/QUOTE]

They better be coated in gold and come with a personal butler, gardener, hairdresser, and chauffer. Then maybe we’ll see.

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[QUOTE=ivylass]
They better be coated in gold and come with a personal butler, gardener, hairdresser, and chauffer. Then maybe we’ll see.
[/QUOTE]

Maybe some kind of really cool little watch pocket?

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Maybe he left $64,999,940 worth of change in the pockets.

8

Somebody needs a cock-punching.

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So if he wins his suit they’ll most certainly be out of business. If they’re out of business he’ll have to ‘drive’ elsewhere. :smack:

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[QUOTE=vetbridge]
Ladies; the kind of pants that make your ass look fantastic. Pants like that.
[/QUOTE]

For that price, they’d better make your ass look like “I gotta get me some of that” to every woman on earth.

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[QUOTE=Snarky_Kong]
Somebody needs a cock-punching.
[/QUOTE]

OW! That hurt to read.

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You know that when a Pit thread starts with “Judge Roy”, you’re in for a whole lot of stoopid.

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[QUOTE=tdn]
You know that when a Pit thread starts with “Judge Roy”, you’re in for a whole lot of stoopid.
[/QUOTE]

Now I have this near-irresistable urge to pit Judge Roy Bean.

I truly hope that DC has a frivolous lawsuit statute that allows the dry cleaners, after this bullshit is laughed out of court, to be awarded their costs and fees along with a healthy penalty to this moron.

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And this guy is still a sitting judge, despite the worm in his brain?

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Mental suffering and inconvenince for a pair of lost fucking pants?
And what kind of car was he renting? An Enzo that ran on the blood of Dodos?
This judge should lose his job if this is what he thinks is a good use of the legal system.

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[QUOTE=Muffin]
And this guy is still a sitting judge, despite the worm in his brain?
[/QUOTE]

::slaps Muffin for missing the obvious joke::

“and this guy is still a sitting judge, despite the fact that he’s not wearing any pants?!?!”

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[QUOTE=wring]
::slaps Muffin for missing the obvious joke::

“and this guy is still a sitting judge, despite the fact that he’s not wearing any pants?!?!”
[/QUOTE]

It’s all right, as long as he doesn’t stand up!

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Without any pants it’s probably easier to use the penis pump under the robe.

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[QUOTE=SnakesCatLady]
Without any pants it’s probably easier to use the penis pump under the robe.
[/QUOTE]

Dammit, I got to the second-to-last post and said to myself, “I can’t believe no one’s posted anything about the penis pump judge yet!” Hmph.

Seriously, don’t they have buses in DC? Does he not have any friends or family who he can say, “Hey, gimme a lift to and from the dry cleaner and I’ll buy you a beer?”

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[QUOTE=wring]
“and this guy is still a sitting judge, despite the fact that he’s not wearing any pants?!?!”
[/QUOTE]
Ohhh, wait…I see the problem here. Apparently, the judge is simply misinformed about the scarcity of his lost treasure. Let’s fix that right now:

Dear Judge Roy,

There is more than one fucking pair of pants in the world, dipshit.

We hope this will bring a bit of clarity to your points on this issue.

Thank you,
Hal