OFFICIAL COUNTDOWN TO NYC DOPEFEST VI: DOPERS DESTROY DOWNTOWN
Two Weeks, Two Days and counting
In today’s news update, dopers everywhere are preparing for the New York City dopefest. Delphica, showing true doper spirit, is commencing her drinking now to get in shape for the dopefest. Next on her training regimen will be loudly relating embarrassing anecdotes about herself, and by the time she gets to the final step of practicing snappy wise-acre reports she’ll be all set for the festivities.
Nacho4Sara is getting herself all lubed and oiled for New Years, and is hoping that the slippery goodness will last until at least January 6. She’s also plotting several schemes to escape from the land of the hex-wrench bookshelves and lingonberry juice to make her way up to New York.
Lurkernomore is maybenomore, confirming that he will de-lurk at the dopefest. When polled about his request that we be gentle with him at this, his first dopefest, prior NYC dopefest attendees unanimously responded: “of course we will.”
Cantrip and dha will be bottoming out with us after the Bottom Line. If Chumleys has thrown us out by the time they’re out of the show, we’ll try to leave word where we have gone (or hopefully have our second stop planned out in time to post it here – hint, hint, manhattan).
MerrySquirrels and Green Bean have endorsed the idea of adding explanatory tag lines to the name tags of dopers who are there with their significant others. For those at the dopefest who are not in actual relationships, the relationships they fantasize they were in will be listed:
Wonko the Sane
[sup]but crazy about SwimmingRiddles[/sup]
SaxFace
[sup]who enjoys “discussing woodwinds” with Ike[/sup]
Chance the Gardner
[sup]won’t someone please take a chance[/sup]
Zebra
[sup]thinking impure thoughts about the goat[/sup]
Falcon
[sup]wondering if she’ll try soulsling’s triple tufted bed[/sup]
Joe_Cool
[sup]prepared to hit on anything that moves[/sup]
HAVE YOU SEEN THESE MISSING PERSONS
An examination of milk cartons around the tri-state area has disclosed that none of the requested dopers has so much as shown up in this thread, much less agreed to come to the dopefest.
Readers everywhere are urged to be on the lookout for Alphagene, Eutychus55, Eve, iampunha, quietgirldownthehall, and TubaDiva. If you see these dopers, please urge them to turn themselves in to Official Countdown before anyone gets hurt. Posses will be forming soon, so it would be best for them to appear voluntarily before they are dragged in. Rewards will be offered to those who can actually get them to appear at the dopefest dead or alive.