I haven’t had a period in 20 years.
I can wear any pair of underwear I want to any day of the month.
I always feel “april fresh”
Owwwwww. Who threw that.
Yeah…the difference between a woman on PMS and a terrorist is that you can still negotiate with a terrorist. 
Uh-oh…was I thinking out loud again?
Boss Mare.
Damn, I like that.
Unless there’s a male horse around, then they become total ho-bags. The last time our alpha mare went into heat she was disgusting. Backing up and rubbing against the fence/trailer/barn/whatever. Then they start screaming (checks to make sure this is the Pit) “Fuck Me! Fuck Me!” in horse. And the coup-de-gras is the behavior my wife accurately calls “winking”, and no, they’re not using their eyes (IYKWIM).
I just finished (I’ll be on time with y’all next month most likely) but I have some leftover Oreo Ice cream form Baskin Robbins. It’s good.
I though you couldn’t cycle when you were on your period. You ride mountain or road bikes?
And man, you ladies are spoiled… getting a new bike every single month. Yeesh.
<<Macro man ducks his head, covers his genitals, and runs like hell for the next room>>>
Please don’t kill me ladies, but this thread gives me reason to say ** Thank heavens ** for early menopause. Polycystic Overian Syndrom or hormonal problems I am having right now. Whatever it is works for me ! No periods for me for a few months now.
I did have a 12 year break from them until 3 years ago too. Lucky me. Freaked the doctors out big time. I just stoped ovulating totally. Yeah I gained some weight, my hair thinned out bad and I started getting some whiskers but it worked for me.
Yup, yup. Just ended here, too. And add to the lovely mix a few IBS episodes, and you’ve got days of fun. This was a really bad cycle.
I’m done having kids. Why do I have to keep suffering this torment? Not even my uterus wants to have more kids; it’s had enough, too!
And I still want salt and chocolate.
Sheri
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by SuaSponte *
**
Well, if you could skip the bleeding part…
Third ChiBitchDoper that started today checking in.
Fuck you all.
Actually, that’s not true. I’m in a great mood today due to circumstances outside of my control, but meet me here again next month. I’m sure I’ll be willing to hate everything with j and mags.
I just wanted to thank all of you lady dopers out there for letting us guys come in and join/ruin your little bitchfest (i.e. you bitching about things, not you being bitches, oh no , not that).
I just got done a week of the Duckess having her “friend” over for a visit. A week of “Yes Dear”, “Of course World War II was my fault”, “You’re right, I was breathing too loud”, and “I feel personally responsible for the French.”, so being able to come in here and make snide & stupid little comments that would otherwise cause Mrs. D to emasculate me with a wood-chipper, is a welcome relief.
Not all women suffer this much every month. I’ve never had cramps in my life, don’t bloat up, have mood-swings or crave food. I do have a lot of back pain but since my back always hurts, that’s not much different from normal.
Sisters, I feel your pain. From when I was 11 up till a few years ago I had cramps like a bullet in the abs and an 8-day bleed. (Oh, that was fun) But I have discovered something wonderful: THE PILL. It’s beautiful. It’s simple. It’s not exactly cheap, but it regulars my cycle, tones down the craps and cut 4 days off the bleeding! Beauty! And if I feel like it, I can skip a period entirely by not taking the white ones! Halleluiah! Join me! It’s bliss!
And girls with diagnosed migraines can’t take it! YAY!
Just for the record, I don’t suffer this much every month either. It’s probably like once a season I get a really bad spell. Sometimes, I don’t even get cramps…so it’s hit or miss with me.
What can I say? Life is a cabaret at the Jarhouse.
I’m not sure who will be more pissed off by this, the boys or the girls, but when the Babestress economic forecast is in the red, she gets extremely amorous. She is all over me. Not on THE day, but for the 4-6 day period around it [sub]hee hee. I said period.[/sub]
She is still pretty emotional, although at least she had a constructive way to vent her frustrations.
[sub]Since our youngest was born, I miss little Euty the uterus.[/sub]
AAAAAAA!!
((curls up under desk in fetal position, gently rocking))
GeeeeAAAA!!!
((quietly vowing to never again be too self concious to get the GF’s tampons))
I laugh at you all!
I am going through early menopause and it’s an easy one. I haven’t had a period since that one day in July. Have the ocassional hot flash but nothing else.
Seems only fair, since I started having the damn things in 4th grade that I now get out of them before I turn 40.
Elenfair, I confess the line isn’t mine - a friend of mine in college came up with it. But he didn’t copyright it, so have at it (and give me credit ;)).
Hama - I have no desire to get between you and your man (particularly if his dick does get swollen and bleed each month). So, I officially have no response to your question. 
Sua
Huh. I’ve made it almost twenty-five years without ovulating once. Guess I’m one of the lucky ones.
[sub]Um, honey? Is there anything I can do for you, darling? …sweetie? Ok, I’ll sleep on the couch again… I mean, in the car…[/sub]
Hey, anything I can do to help out The Cause…
::snicker::