Simple, thim poor homosexual are an abomnation (in a bomb nation?) and they need to be SAVED!! PRAISE JESUSUH!!
Who is this jesusuh guy anyways? Some sort of cross (haha! I’m so funny) between Jesus and Jehovah? He doesn’t sound very nice, but maybe he’s just an old testament “angry god” kinda deity
For no particular reason I’d like to break Swaggart’s jaw. Fucking shatter it.
I don’t know. But I’ve felt it. If a guy makes a pass at me (and it’s sexual enough in content), my first reaction is to hit. I’m not sure if it feels like a violation of my personal space, or an insult to my masculinity, or my unfamiliarity with such an advance (Og knows I’m not used to women being so forward with me), but the instinct is certainly there.
Thank the IPU that I have never acted on such an impulse, and instead responded with a polite No Thanks. I’m pretty sure I can respond that way in the future, although what a gay man wants in an overweight, balding, poorly dressed guy like me is anyone’s guess.
Brother Swaggart’s admonitions are especially difficult for persons, such as myself, who combine the physical aspects of George Clooney and Sean Connery. Fortunately, I live in Minneapolis, where it is relatively easy to avoid contact with the homosexual population, since they both live in St. Paul.
But what of the women, Brother Jimmy? With their sidelong glances and sly innuendoes, like twirling a doughnut on thier forefingers, and flaunting their feminine wiles, all the while seeking to undermine my moral resolve and steely resistance, with their D-cups of fornication! Are they any less guilty? Aren’t the widely circulated photos of our own Lynn Bodoni and Eddy Teddy, clad in seductive “swimwear”…are not such as these provocations to dreadful sin?
Now, if they were to be clad in tasteful, full-length garments of simple homespun, leaving just enough opening for sight, wouldn’t this go a long way to promoting the moral vigor of our nation? Unless I’m very much mistaken, such garments as these are already being mass produced in the ME, it would be a simple matter to import a few hudred million!
Food for thought, brethren and sistren, food for thought!
You’re funny, dear.
But my post urging compassion on Jimmy was founded on almost precisely what you’re saying. Take a look at the Parable of the Sheep and Goats, in Matthew 25:31-46 – an accurate reading of that says that while decent gay people like Priam and Jayjay will be gathered in for doing unto others as they themselves would be done unto, folks like Jimmy are going to find that Jesus attributes how they treated others as having been done unto Himself, and tell them to get lost.
I can’t really imagine why anyone takes much notice of Swaggart, I mean, I hear the name and I think ‘oh yeah, that guy who got hauled over the coals for being a fraudulent, moneygrabbing, philandering liar’ - is there any particular reason (other than stupidity) that he has any followers at all?
And you’re a darling, my sweetly reasonable and superbly humane dumpling.
Hey, I may be a lapsed Congregationalist, but I can muster up some brimstone now and then.
And by the way, luci, I thought you’d said you’d burned those pictures! :eek: Haven’t I paid you enough already? :mad:
“God has forgiven me. Why can’t you?”
“Makes sense. Luther, send him little Bobby’s college fund.”
Bloom County…how I miss you still!
Hey, in the Weekly World News they covered a story about how Gays are planning to Take Over The World. I sure wish they’d hurry up!
I mean, who’d ya rather hang round with? Jimmy Swaggart and the BagsO’Wind or a bunch of gays?
Thought so.
Case closed.
I will never pronounce the word abomination correctly again. Thanks, Jimmy!
[sub]It’s an a-bomb-nation! It’s an a-bomb-nation! An a-bomb-nation!!![/sub]
:: rueful sigh ::
Oh, very well. I suppose there’s no denying that there is one particularly explicit photo of me on the beach now available on the Internet.
Ah, the follies of middle age do dwarf those of one’s youth. :o
Hmm, I guess I’m not as good a Christian as I thought I was. I mean, I finally managed being comfortable with being a homo and being Christian, as everything I understand about Christianity teaches about love, honor, and devotion being so much more important than sex.
But then, Christianity also teaches compassion, even against those who would wish violence against you. And I can’t bring myself to muster any compassion whatsoever for this total sack of shit.
Is Swaggart the one who went on the 700 Club with Pat Robertson talking about how the World Trade Center attacks were God’s vengeance against us for being a corrupt country that promoted homosexuality? Or was that Jerry Falwell? Who’s the one who did the whole “I have sinned against you all?” crying speech? I get them all confused.
Jimmy, he’s not looking at you like he wants to marry you. Maybe Jimmy’s not so anti-homosexual, he’s just against marriage. Based on that quote, it sounds like if a man looked at him just like he wanted to fuck him, Jimmy’d be fine with that. Remember to play it safe, Jim!
Bad, bad moderator. I just have to say -
That wouldn’t be Annie Sprinkles, would it? 
Bad, bad Gamera!
Man I just gotta say the seahorses around her don’t look nothin like that!
It was Falwell who blamed 9/11 on the gays and liberals in general, and Swaggart who gave the big pathetic speech. It is hard to tell one fundie nutjob from another without a program.
No, Swaggart is the one who was caught MULTIPLE times in compromising positions with $20 whores in particularly bad parts of Baton Rouge & New Orleans. He “repented”, of course, and offered to step down from his nine-figure-per-year ministry, but instead God told him that he was forgiven and should keep on preaching. (According to an interview with one of his tarts, he paid her $20 per session to masturbate for him while he wore crotchless sweatpants and wanked; when he learned she had a 9 year old daughter he offered to pay her several times their going rate if she would bring the child to watch them, but that’s alright cause God forgave him. Several times.)
Trivia: As with his first cousin, Jerry Lee Lewis, Swaggart took to wife a cousin who was 13 when they married. (Another cousin is Mickey Gilley.)
Correction: I should not have said that Brother Swaggart frequents $20 whores as that is incorrect. In fact he is a gentleman and paid $35 per hour. He also admits to a “lifelong addiction to pornography”.
Refresher course in Swaggart scummery.
When I get to see the Jimmy, I am going to blow a kiss to him.
Being that I am Bubba-sized and may be packing heat, he better think twice about his sermon.
Something about judging? Judges? Not judging a sinless man who casts the first…no that’s not it. Has something to do with possibly being judged by…birds of the field? No. Hm, can’t think of it just now.
This God Person is said to act in mysterious ways (U2, I think). Perhaps the God Person made Jimmy for reasons known only to Him, and maybe even to him? Perhaps J.S.'s relationship with God is between J.S. & God? And perhaps all of us need to pay more attention to our own relationships with Whoever/Whatever it is that we worship and not worry so much about Jimmy, and more about how we conduct our own lives and relationships?
As for what Jimmy says and what he incites others to do, that is all between God and His chilluns: The ones whiped into a cruel and barbaric frenzy by another man, as well as those who suffer at their hands. If you truly believe in This God Person and all the trappings that go along with it, is not our condition on this earth pointless when compared to what we do with the time we are given? Some of us are messengers, others are the messages.
Just a thought.
For my part, I handled my first advance by a homo poorly (of course, a darkened room and a locked exit made the unexpected and, ahem, “blunt” proposal a bit firghtening) but not violently unless you count ripping a door off its hinges as violent. I still don’t care one way or the other about anyone’s sexuality apart from my wife’s–and then only so long as she gives it up to me once in a while. I can’t see such an inquiry as death worthy in and of itself–shit, all any of us really want is to get laid every so often, right? Can’t blame someone for trying.
Well, after all, “teddy” is your middle name, right? 