Damn it! Why are you so leaky, apartment? I understand the bathroom leak, and that is easily mended.
But WTF is up with a soaking wet pillow and wet windowsill when there hasn’t been rain in days? Where the fuck is the water coming from, it’s an exterior wall in the bedroom, there’s no plumbing anywhere near it!
FUCK! I really like you, apartment, you’re small and cute and cheap and centrally-located, but the water issues need to fucking stop.
Done 
I looking forward to the Maxi version of a rant from him. Well done.
Man-hugs are insiduously replacing handshakes in casual and business situations, no longer being reserved for great plays in sport or drunken affirmations of true friendship. I actually got hugged by my boss, WTF?
Do you tell him “peace out” when you’re leaving for the day? Do you say “What up G?” when you first come in?
If no to both of these, then yes, man-hugging your boss is weird.
And now someone has burnt popcorn in the office microwave. I swear, this has been the week of needless aggravation. I just wanna go home and pet the cats, maybe even weed the garden, but I’m not going to get that. Why o why do I keep volunteering for things?
I work in a 22 floor building in Seattle and about 6 months ago we got a letter from the building manager stating that microwave popcorn was no longer allowed in the building due to too many false fire alarms? What? Seriously, how big of a fucking moron do you have to be to burn up the microwave so bad it triggers a fire alarm?
Just big enough of a fucking moron to set the microwave and walk away from it. For what it’s worth, the big fucking moron at my office just burned it a little, so the smell is wafting though the recycled, miserable excuse for air I get in this g-d forsaken pit.
Just as dogs know when you are scared of them, microwaves know when the human has left the room, and choose that moment to self-destruct in an orgy of smoke and carbon.
I disagree. I think the poor microwave was just doing what is was meant to do. Just some dumb ass came along and killed the poor little guy, in an orgy of smoke and carbon.
That toaster is probably in toaster heaven extremely pisssed off that’s how his life came to a sudden end.
Well that sucks. The smell of freshly popped popcorn is awesome. The smell of burnt popcorn is vile.
In our office if you run the toaster and the microwave at the same time the circuit breaker goes kaput.
Don’t even get me started on all the fucking morons and elevator usage. But I think we already had a thread for that.
So my mini rant is to my building mates: quit being fucking morons.
Someone at my workplace enjoys butter-flavored microwave popcorn. I don’t know what brand it is, but the stuff makes the breakroom and surrounding hallways smell like piss.
Woman, if you are going to ask people to help you move, have your shit already packed! You and your husband live in a 1 bedroom 500 square foot apartment. How hard can it be? My husband was there at 11 AM to help you move stuff onto the truck and unload at the new place. He’s been gone for almost four hours, and it’s because you had three people helping you load this morning, and four people helping you pack! WTF? You’re lucky that you’re one of my oldest friends, because my husband doesn’t even like you or your husband.
edit: removed, wrong thread
I pit my friend’s husband. The stuff* he is doing makes me cry and it’s not even me it’s happening to.
*Not abuse or stalking. He’s just a gigantic ass.
Two completely different mini-rants for me
Lady, if you’re going to buy an entire cart of groceries, the rest of us in the checkout line would appreciate it if you’d get your credit/debit card out and have it ready when the cashier finishes ringing up your items. Instead, you waited until everything was rung up and bagged, and then acted as if it was a surprise that you were actually expected to pay for your purchases. What followed was an eternity of rummaging through every single card in your purse – Og only knows what special card you were looking for, but it was clear you had no idea where it might be.
Then, once you’d finally located whatever card you were looking for, and ran it thru the card scanner, we had to wait even longer while you carefully returned it to whatever vault inside your purse you’d dug it from. Meanwhile the cashier had placed the receipt and a pen on the signing pad, and was waiting for you to sign the damn thing and move along so she could get started checking out the rest of us.
Secondly: to all state departments of transportation - but especially Pennsylvania’s. It’s really not necessary to block off a lane of the interstate for miles and miles when the actual work zone is only about 100 feet long.
And finally a bonus half-rant. Buddy, if you want to specify how your burger is cooked, then you shouldn’t be at McDonalds, OK?
Excellent. Did he order a chardonnay with his burger?
There’s no way too cook it different. At Mcdonalds they put it in a clam shell grill press. When I worked there the burgers used to come out bloody. I thought they need cooked longer so I put them back back in. Manager came over and yelled at me.
I guess they’re supposed to be bloody. I didn’t work there long.
My darling niece just used a bunch of CLEAN towels to clean up overflow toilet water. I have plenty of dirty towels she could have used; it’s so stupid!
Some asshole stole my favorite shirt right off my patio. Not only that, but the reason it was there was because it was the shirt I was wearing when my cat went missing, so I searched for her and got it all sweaty - so I left it out on the patio so hopefully she’d pick up the familiar scent and find her way home.
So some shitbag steals a shirt right off my fucking patio. There’s not even anyone who lives near me that wears my size - what, you can’t fucking pass up the opportunity to steal something whenever it crops up even if you don’t have a use for it?
If I catch someone wearing that shirt I’m going to take my shirt off, put some war paint on my face, set his car on fire, stand on the hood, and shout challenges at him.
Was the shirt just lying on a chair or something, vs. pinned up to a clothesline? Because dogs like smelly clothing and have been known to carry them off to roll around on.
I hope your cat comes home soon.