She conks to stupor.
Well, on the one hand, the stage magician has a cunning stunt…
Are you a Protestant Jew or a Catholic Jew?
Hey Mister I see you shot yourself another golf
“Ah, well,” he said. “I suppose it’s better Nate than lever.” And he ran over the snake.
(sweating profusely) Me? I’m not really here!
(With a mischievous smile) Hi! I’m Mary!
Dammit, I missed!
You are?! Damn! I’m the luckiest Palestinian in Ireland!
The Royal Canadian Mounted Police.
Parrot: IT’S THE PLUMBER!
Sir Lancelot: [unintelligible]
It’s a start.
The parrot said, “Africa.”
Tuna fish.
Michael (“Meathead”) Stivic: Abraham - Lincoln!
She said, “I thought I told you to go to sleep.”
Edith (“Dingbat”) Bunker:
I didn’t know Lincoln was Jewish…
First one:
Because they’re afraid of the cow falling on them.
Second one:
Because they can’t figure out how to get a whole jug of water into the little packet of powder.
I’ll have you know my grandfather donated that lightbulb!