Oh, btw, I didn’t mean ALL of you, everyone here.
I meant, those who have their heads stuffed up their asses.
Carry on!
it’s not a given thing for me to have my cramps be totally debilitating. but it happens often enough for my doctor to prescribe me very strong painkillers for them.
luckily i haven’t had terrible cramps when i’ve needed to work. but one time in high school i had horrendous cramps start in my lunch hour. i only had one more class to go before the end of the day, so i decided to tough it out. i had none of my medication with me.
well i spent that entire class period hunched over whimpering. there was no way i could have done anything if we had had a lab or a test that day. instead i just sat there while the teacher had a useless lecture. it felt like my ovaries were being gnawed on by a rabid rottweiler.
when class ended, i couldn’t even walk to my locker, i had to crawl. then i had to crawl to the bathroom because i started feeling naseous. i VOMITED my cramps were so bad, then i spaced in and out for a half-hour. if i had actually had to do work, i would not have been able to. does that mean i have a shitty work ethic? NO. * it means that i had cramps that were ten times worse than any cramps i had ever experienced; and they were painful enough to be debilitating*. so since you haven’t had anything like that, that means that no one is capable of having that? i don’t think so.
i’ve gone to work with the flu before, (never missed a single day of work) or with a cold or even after i had eye surgery and had a nice patch over half my face and was a bit woozy. but i was able to function. with those cramps i described, there was no way i’d be able to do anything more than curl up and cry. it’s a physical fact, and has nothing to do with my work ethic.
Men sure can be PIGS sometimes can’t we? This reminds me of the ball-kicking thread. Believe it, catsix… a swift kick in the nuts would help you understand the kind of pain they are talking about.
So, Guin, exactly what percentage of your scheduled days for a month do you actually call in sick?
Because from your posts here, it sounds like a lot.
I never claimed to be ‘wonderful and healthy and the perfect employee’, but I do show up for work every day and deal with shit work even when I don’t want to. It blows, and sometimes I don’t feel well and I’d rather be home (last week, fluid in my lungs - yummy - but I still worked 65 hours). And as for everyone giving a crap only about themselves and screw everyone else - welcome to the ladder commonly known as ‘corporate America.’
Hell half the reason I show up for work when I feel like I’m dead is because I know if I’m there, nobody can be screwing up my work in my absence and knifing me in the back to get my job.
zweisamkeit:
Where are we getting the impression that I’ve never had cramps, even really bad ones, before? I remember days working construction that I’d throw up before we left the garage, at first break, before lunch, when we got out of the trucks, and again when I got home. It wasn’t the happiest of working conditions, but it was never debilitating.
dna_man:
That’s nice, but I don’t have nuts. I have, however, had menstrual cramps many, many times… and they really are not that bad. What amazes me is that you’re convinced they really are. Because it shows me that it’s true. Females really have figured out the ultimate in ‘get men to feel sorry for us’. In reality IF they’re as bad as is being professed in here, then these ladies need to go see a doctor immediately. Cramps are not that severe repeatedly unless there’s something really WRONG.
No, YOUR menstrual cramps are not that bad. YOUR cramps. MINE are. Go screw. Oh, you’re acting like a helpless female. No, I’m saying I’m in pain, fuckstick. And I would go to the doctor, but there’s this little problem about not having medical insurance.
Perhaps I think it’s unprofessional to be waiting on people while hunched over. Perhaps I think it’s rude and wrong to go into work while hacking and puking and making other people sick. Whatever.
I never SAID how often or whatever I call off. Quite frankly, it’s none of your damn business, and you don’t have to fucking deal with it, okay?
How can I stay at a register when I’m THROWING UP, dumbass? What, should I keep a bucket near by? Oh, the customers will LOVE that! :rolleyes: Sheesh! If I went to a store, and saw a sick employee, you better believe I would complain to managment, because a person should NOT be waiting on customers when they are unwell! I don’t want to get whatever they have, or watch them hacking all over the place. It’s gross and quite frankly, very rude! If I were the boss, I’d send you home if you came in like that, because it’s unprofessional-got it?
I doubt anyone is going to “knife me in the back to get my job.” Unless you want to be a check out slave at Kmart-be my guest.
And oh, how the FUCK am I supposed to wait on someone when I’m having a panic attack? What the fucking HELL is wrong with you! I suppose I should just “deal with it?”
If that’s your attitude, you can just go fuck yourself with Courtney Love’s recently used, unwashed dildo for all I care. Because you obviously don’t know JACKSHIT about my situation.
(As far as climbing the corporate ladder, in case you didn’t notice, this isn’t my life’s ambition. Go to hell).
YOU started this thread ranting because your boss is an asshole for expecting you to show up for work when scheduled.
YOU got mad because your boss said something about ‘calling tomorrow’ to see if you were better after YOU gave that boss no indication of what was actually wrong.
YOU yourself said that the place was already short-staffed and would be even more so without you there.
YOU then think you have some grounds to call this boss a fucking asshole for wanting you to be at work on your scheduled shifts and YOU think something’s wrong with ME because I know where the boss is coming from?
Look, I’m really sorry that you have so many medical problems it makes your life so miserable, but that is not your employer’s problem. You’ve made it your employer’s problem by calling off work on less than 24 hours notice when the boss can’t find someone else to fill in, so of course the boss is a fucking asshole for wanting you to come in if you feel better by the time your shift starts. Jesus, what’s wrong with that boss. He oughta be shot for such evil thinking.
If you wanna call in sick, that’s up to you. But you’ve got no grounds to call your boss a fucking asshole. Frankly, it just sounds whiny as all hell. It’s perfectly reasonable that the boss is gonna wanna talk to you and see if you’re better again the next day to see if you’re coming or if he’s still gotta find someone else (or fill in for you himself). He wanted you to come in the next day if you were feeling better because that was your scheduled day to work, and all of a sudden HE’s a dickhead for not reading your goddamn mind?
You blew up with way too little impetus on this one.
Guin, I thought I knew what a panic attack must be like. I’ve panicked a couple of times in my life, and I do have a phobia which must be faced every now and then, which causes constant fear and loss of sleep for a month in advance. How different can a panic attack be?
Then I watched a friend go through a panic attack.
No clue. I have no clue.
I suspect that explaining a panic attack to someone who has never experienced one is like trying to explain cramps to men. Or like them trying to explain a kick in the nuts to us.
Or like you trying to explain debilitating cramps to someone who doesn’t experience them.
You’re kidding! Ewww! You drag yourself into work, and work 65 hours anyway? Did you have anything that was contagious? And 65 hours? What? You want to win the “martyr” award for working 65 hours when you have fluid in your lungs? That doesn’t strike me so much as a good work ethic as it strikes me of someone who is working themselves into a nice hospital visit. It’s counter-productive.
There’s a distinction between not giving a damn for your co-workers and calling in sick any old time (so you can go to the beach) and calling in sick when you are SICK. Sorry, not all of us want to drag ourselves in when we are miserable and hacking up something. I don’t think that is a mandatory part of being part of the work force. That’s why they call them sick days. You use them when you are SICK.
I have worked overtime to help out my coworkers. Hell, I worked 16 hours on Christmas Day so a coworker could have the day off. I’ll drag myself to work when I am feeling under the weather, but am confident that my crackpot herbs and multiple liters of bottled water will sustain me. But I won’t work when I am knock-down-drag-out sick. And I won’t feel guitly for it.
Perhaps I could be wrong, but I have to say - you remind me a little bit of the boss who wanted me to leave my handicapped sister and elderly friend on the day of the Northridge Quake. (I guess she figured that since they were adults, they could take care of themselves.) She gave me her line about how she was up and about the day of the quake, before the sun came up. She bragged about how she drove on the freeway, to get to work. However, she failed to mention that since some of the freeway had collapsed clean away she was risking her own life by driving on a freeway while it was still dark. (One policeman died when his motorcycle fell off the edge of a broken part of the freeway.) But - oh no! She was heroic! She was dedicated! Oh yeah! God Forbid anything get in the way of showing up for work! She told me “Don’t let some earthquake get in your way!” Give me a freaking break.
I don’t care if it make me look like I have a “bad work ethic” to some, but my family comes before work, my personal heath and safety come before work. If that upsets some bosses, who think they can “guilt” me into forsaking my own personal health and safety, that’s their problem. (I’ve had more than one boss like this…let me tell you - it’s the tip of the iceberg…)
Yikes. You have issues with your job then, that have nothing to do with sick days, and their proper use.
Guin:
Where did you find the information about Kelly requiring payment from you to find you a temp job? I’ve been working for Kelly on and off for the last four years and I’ve never had to pay them a red cent. Same with ManPower and Spherion.
jayjay
Yeah, I work 65 hours a week. I did it last week, fluid in lungs and everything. Doctor assured me that I was not in any way contagious and as long as I felt like I could be walking around, I could be walking around. So I did my usual week, I took my medicine like I was supposed to, and this week I’m fine. And I’ll trust my doctor’s advice on the hospital thing, since so far he’s been right.
I’m not ‘hacking up’ anything, so it’s not really an inconvenience to anyone else if I’m there when I’ve got the fluid, although it is an inconvenience to them if I’m not there because then someone else has to do the things I was supposed to - which basically most of them don’t know how to do so they either don’t get done or they get done wrong.
That’s the other part, the ‘half the reason’. While I’m gone, ‘helpful’ people who really wanna do what it is I do all day try to do those things ‘for’ me so they don’t build up while I am out sick. Only these things generally get done wrong, and that gets blamed on me because it’s assumed that if they’re done at all, I did them.
Anyway, I don’t have a problem with people taking time off when they’re actually sick, but like I already said I have an extremely hard time seeing how being on the rag could possibly be that bad as a regular occurrance and not involve some sort of trip to the doctor to figure out what the hell is wrong, and also a problem with immediately jumping all over Guin’s boss’s back as if he’s the biggest asshole on earth. Because honestly, it wasn’t that unreasonable. ‘If you’re feeling better tomorrow, on your scheduled day of work, can you come in? We do need you. We’ll call and see.’
Not the federal freakin case that was made out of it here. Without any other information than that she was feeling under the weather, there’s no reason for him not to ask that she come in if she feels better. Unless of course, he was supposed to read her mind and know that because of the specific problem, which he was never told what it was, that she knew for a fact she wouldn’t be feeling well in 12 hours.
I would’ve asked the same thing. Something like ‘How bout I call you tomorrow and see if you feel like you can come in?’
I really don’t think he was being a fuckwad for that. He expected that if she felt better, she’d come in. Instead he’s called a ‘fucking asshole’ and all the respondees here want his head on a pole. I don’t see what the big deal is.
I can’t stand when people can’t empathize, especially when it comes to periods. I have maybe a little bit more understanding for unsympathetic guys because they can’t know how it feels. But for unsympathetic women I have no patience. They work my freakin’ nerves.
Guin, I understand. Fortunately, when I’m sick with cramps I usually can stay home without having to tell anyone. It’s one of the few perks of being a graduate student.
Work is good. Having a strong work ethic is something to proud of. But sound health and mind are good things too. We shouldn’t sacrifice those things out of fear of being called lazy.
I have bad periods sometimes. On the first day, I have horrible bloat and fatigue and general malise. On these days I vomit and have diarrhea and look like death on a soda cracker. All the Advil in the world can’t help me. Cramps come on the third day and they are the absolute worse. Sometimes I’ll down a bunch of painkillers the night before in preparation for the inevitable.
I understand there a few women who never have cramps or complications. These are also the same women who claim to never have PMS. And to these people I say fine, good for ya’ll. But don’t denigrate those of us who do have hard times or try to make us feel bad by saying we’re exaggerating. How the hell can you know when someone’s exaggerating over pain and illness?
Guin, is it possible that you can talk to your boss one day and explain to him that sometimes you might need to have one or two days off for your period? If your workplace is as bad off for help as you make it out to be, he shouldn’t mind making that adjustment in your work schedule to accomodate your needs. If he scoffs at the idea, then move on. K-Mart ain’t all that and you can find another place that will better appreciate you and your talents.
Actually, cat, you’re missing something.
Guin called in the day before as a favor to the company.
That’s right. A favor. I don’t know how long it’s been since you worked in retail, but most workers who know their boss constantly short-staffs them will call in not the day before, when it’s relatively easy for the boss to call someone else to repleace them, but will call the day of.
Since Guin knew she was going to be out, she tried to help her boss out by calling and letting them know with enough notice to fill the short-shifted position. Hell, I’ve worked in positions where it was my responsibility to find a replacement when I was sick as a dog or needed a day off on short notice. Disneyland operates that way, as a matter of fact, as far as days off on short notice (of course, if you’re sick you’re sick, and that’s why DL gives you sick days. One a month, as a matter of fact, that accumulate until the end of the year).
Don’t attribute malice to Guin and others like her because you have issues with your place of employment. If backstabbing is that much of a concern, I would highly recommend looking for new employment. Just as I have recommended to Guin.
After all, that has to lead to a lot of stress. Stress, in turn, leads to a suppressed immune system.
And god forbid you should be genuinely sick and someone should “steal” your job. :rolleyes:
Oh, and one other thing - what makes you think we haven’t been to the doctor about the severity of our menstrual symptoms? I went - several times - because my cycle never settled down even when I was past 25.
Know what I was told? My symptoms - and my erratic cycle - were “normal.”
Sometimes, you’re reminded why they call it “practice.”
Um, hello? I didn’t say he just asked me if I would feel better he actually said, “Well, why don’t you come in anyways?”
It wasn’t what he said, but HOW he said it. He sounded like, oh, well, too bad, you have to come in, sick or not. And when he said, “we’ll see how you feel tomorrow”, his tone was one of, “You liar.” Or something to that tone.
If I really wanted to be a jerk, I could have waited until a half an hour before my shift and called off. No, I decided to be nice and give a little notice. Addmitedly, Walt is a dick. Everyone mostly agrees. Craig was very nice about my being sick. Others have been nice. If he had said nicely, we’ll call in the morning. No, he said, “Wait, you say you’re sick? Well, can’t you come in anyways?”
No, but it’s fucking disgusting. And if I were in that condition-when my job is to be with the public at all times, it would be a tad inconvenient, to put it mildly. Let me ask you this-if you walked into a store, and YOU saw a cashier puking into a waste basket in between checking people out, would YOU go through her line?
:rolleyes:
You also seem to have missed the part where I mentioned I have no medical insurance. I can’t visit a doctor about my cramps right now, even if I wanted to, because I. Can’t. Afford. It.
Not to mention, I’ve said this to doctors in the past, and they told me it was normal. And it runs in the family-my mother was the same way, as is my sister.
(Kelly and such-I believe my dad mentioned it. D’oh. Now I feel stupid. Never rely on word of mouth. I’ll look. thanks.)
Fine, I’m a wimpy, weak female who needs pampering and smelling salts. Whatever.
I am looking for another job.
But, no, I won’t sit around and empathize with people who bitch about their periods. I don’t see the need to have kumbayah moments over someone calling her boss an asshole for asking her to come in on her scheduled day if she felt better.
Courtesy to call the day before missing? Maybe. Responsibility to show up when scheduled? Um, Yes.
You wanna call in sick, fine. Do so. Whatever. But it’s asinine and rediculous to rake the boss over the coals for his efforts to get an employee to be there for a scheduled shift.
If it’s so bad you have to take a day off, then take one and quit bitching at your boss for being unable to read your fucking mind. Going into greater and greater detail and reaching new heights of metaphor are not going to change the fact that he didn’t have all the information to begin with, so he went with ‘If you’re feeling better tomorrow, please come in at your scheduled time.’
And if you wanna call me a traitor to women because I’m not empathizing over period issues, you just go right ahead. I still won’t empathize because I still don’t think it’s as bad as it’s being made out to be.
I never said you were a traitor to anybody. I simply said-don’t tell me I’m exaggerating. I’ll know when I’m exaggerating, dammit.
:rolleyes:
That being said, as far as short staffed-they do that on purpose. We have plenty of people, but they deliberately make the schedules up so we don’t have enough people. And this has NOTHING to do with filing Chapter 11-it’s always been that way. Why, I don’t know, but I suspect it’s just because they’re cheap.
I wasn’t complaining because he couldn’t read my mind. I was bitching because he was acting like a jackass, by the way he said, “Oh, really?” Well!
If someone is sick, they’re sick. Until they’ve given reason otherwise, it’s best not to treat your staff as if they’re liars.
Guin clarified, he wanted her to come in even THOUGH she was sick.
I had a boss do this. I had strained my back at work. I told my boss this. I didn’t want to ruin my back because of work. The boss just kept on repeating “Can you come into work?” as if she didn’t hear me say “I’M NOT COMING INTO WORK, I HAVE HURT MY BACK.” (I didn’t come in to work. Screw this, I thought. No job is worth potentially ruining my back.)
I know the type. I think I have Guin’s boss’s number. I think they all must go to “Asshole Boss Camp”, where they are trained to pretend they don’t hear an employee say “I’m sick. I can’t come in.” I guess they think if they keep ignoring the employee’s illness, it will cease to exist. Or maybe they get extra “asshole boss points” for dragging ill employees in to work. I dunno.
So, which is it? Be “resonsible to show up when scheduled”, even when you are sick? Either you show up when you are sick, or you don’t. That’s why they invented SICK DAYS. So that people could NOT show up on days they were “scheduled to work”, “responsibility” or no.
Is it appropriate for a boss to want an ill employee to show up for work? When said ILL employee calls to say they need to call in sick?
This takes the cake. Just because you don’t understand it, it can’t possibly exist. So, you can speak for the discomfort of other women’s periods, huh? What, are you some sort of psychic or empath? Just because you don’t “think it’s as bad as it’s being made out to be” doesn’t mean that you are right. God Forbid! You might be WRONG! You may not be all-knowing! You think there is an itty-bitty possibility that perhaps you might not know all about everyone else’s menstrual cycles? And don’t tell me that this is not what you are doing, because it’s exactly what you are doing. When you say you “don’t think it’s bad as it’s being made out to be”, you are assuming that the claims made about periods are bogus.
Oooh, bite me.
I’m sick and freakin tired of people who claim things are so horribly awful that they can’t go to work, that they’re downright debilitating, but of course they don’t go to a doctor. Why? Oh doctors are expensive.
Yeah, well if it’s something that has become debilitating, then expensive or not it seems like a doctor is a fucking necessity and it’s time to figure out some way to actually SEE ONE.
If you have a debilitating condition, go to a god damn doctor. Obviously it’s not bad enough to do that, but it is bad enough that ‘I can’t go to work’. Sure. MMMMHMMMM. I buy it.
But hey, back to the part about the boss who actually wants his employees to show up on their scheduled days. You call off work the night before, and the boss says he hopes you can come in, says something about if you’re feeling better, doesn’t sound AT ALL like he’s being an asshole.
It sounds like often times what feels at night like total and utter shit feels BETTER in the morning. So of course, this guy is a total fuckin dickwad for tryin to get someone to actually show up for work by suggesting they MIGHT NOT FEEL SICK TOMORROW. Oh what a travesty. Get the fuck over it.
If you’re going to be all ‘nice’ and call in the night before to tell them you’re not comin to work, don’t be too shocked if they don’t kiss your ass for it. ‘Oh, thank you for calling so much no I don’t mind at all if you completely fuck up the schedule for tomorrow and force me to have to come in on my off day to personally cover for you I just appreciate that you called and told me this on a Friday night. Can I have some flowers or something sent over? How about a nice herbal tea?’
Jesus H. Fucking Christ what do you want out of this boss? It’s like you all expect him to kiss her ass and hold her hand because she has cramps. As if he should be bowing down right now saying ‘No, no! The dreaded female trouble! I am a horrible clod who deserves to die.’ That’s BULLSHIT. The dude is doing his job.
And at least he is.
Do you think that each and every time someone calls in sick, they MUST be so ill that they require a doctor visit? Even if they’ve ALREADY VISITED THE DOCTOR (as some people here have stated) and have already been told that their symptoms are “normal”? Or do you think that some of these women must visit the doctor each and every month, just to have the doctor repeat that yep, the miserable symptoms they are still experiencing are, yep, still normal?
:rolleyes: There have been plenty of times I can think of where I knew what was wrong with me, was pretty confident it would pass in 24 hours, and yep, was STILL sick. Should I be expected to go into work anyway? Even though I was barfing regularly, or was spending way too much time in the bathroom? Or do you think that every time someone has the runs, or is barfing a lot, or has menstrual cramps, it’s a drastic thing that REQUIRES a doctor visit? Because if that’s so, the doctors’ offices are going to be overflowing, even more than they are now. Can’t you concieve of the idea that there are actually illnesses that are miserable enough to miss work for, but aren’t drastic enough to rush out to see a doctor?
And calling in at the last moment is preferable to calling in a day before? How, exactly? How would a boss be at an advantage if they don’t know they need to call in someone else until the last moment? Please specify how waiting until the last moment to call is preferable.
And, another important point: It wouldn’t be such a drastic thing when someone calls in sick if the management would actually adequately staff each shift to begin with. Some of these retail establishments are constantly in a position of self-inflicted crisis. THEY choose to understaff, not the employees. And then the management goes into a complete tailspin because, God Forbid, some employee has the audacity to turn up sick, puking and feeling like crap. Damn. God Forbid an employee be SICK! The nerve!
I remember one time a supervisor get miffed at me (not for long, she was a good natured soul) because I called from across town, waiting for a tow truck, a few hours before work. The car’s brakes failed, completely. I told her I had no other way of getting into work, unless she wanted to pick me up and take me home. (I hasten to add, I rarely use sick days, or get days off - I worked Christmas day, fer crying out loud.) Her first response was a sardonic “Well, this is short notice.” To which I replied “Oh, I know. I had this CRAZY idea - that I could go out and drive my car on the road! That because I have a car, I am entitled to drive it around! What was I thinking!?!” (The supervisor laughed at this.) Oh, I know, I suppose I could have taken a taxi. But I didn’t feel like spending the money (it would have been prohibitively expensive) and besides, I was WAY backlogged for holiday and vacation time. I was certainly entitled to use a day off.
Some things you just can’t predict. If a schedule is set up so that the absence of one person is going to put everything into a tailspin, whose fault is it? I’ll tell you - it isn’t the fault of the person who is sick or has a major car problem. It’s the fault of the person who makes the fricking schedule. I refuse to be held responsible, or feel guilty because they make SCREWED UP schedules.
Well, if you’re so sick, why don’t you go to the doctor then? Because obviously you can’t be sick unless you immediately seek medical advice.
**
Are you being sarcastic? Because doctors ARE expensive, at least they were the last time I checked.
I know I would think twice going to the doctor knowing that they might be as assholish as you are. Having to deal with unsympathetic people like you would be enough to make me feel sicker.
**
And you know Guin’s entire medical history how? How do you know that she hasn’t sought medical help in the past and just recently has been without insurance?
**
And you heard the conversation how? Were you there? I think Guin–by actually knowing the guy and hearing him on the phone–has a better assessment of his assholishness than you do.
Guin gets paid to work, not to suffer. And I don’t think the world stopped turning because she decided her comfort was more important than alerting K-Mart shoppers about the bluelight special on aisle 5.
It’s people like you who bitch and moan when the cashiers at the grocery store aren’t smiling and bouncing around like idiotic cheerleaders. Well, you can’t have employees like that if they’re on the verge of vomitting. To me, you can’t have it both ways. People aren’t slaves and they aren’t robots, especially when they are only making minimum wage. And I’m sorry, but missing one lousy day at K-Mart ain’t enough to come down on someone as harshly as you are doing. Get a freakin’ life.