Best compliment I ever got was “not bad for a white boy” accompanied by a big stupid grin and general inability to move.
Yep. You certainly sound doable to me. Rowr.
Are you good in bed? No idea - how many times have you fallen out?
You are Smoove B and I claim my £5.
I think maybe next time you ask a woman if you’re the thing, you probably ought to mention that you need to know so that you can brag about it on a message board. It might affect the answer.
Not being one to blow my own trumpet…but…
A girl once said to me “That was the most erotic thing I’ve ever had done to me”
Naturally I just shrugged it off as the norm
Interesting. Which end of the trumpet did you insert?
I knew a girl who was so good at sex that when she orgasmed, she called out her own name.
~Rodney Dangerfield
My favourite line:
You don’t always have to fuck her hard. In fact, that’s sometimes not right - to do. Sometimes you got to make some lovin and fuckin give her some smootches too.
-Jack Black
I don’t know why, but I’ve got this song going through my head now - thanks! :rolleyes:
Always with the wise cracks aintcha?
FYI. It was the mouthpiece avec tongue
Okay, I was going to leave this thread alone as either fishing or bragging, but I gotta say something about this:
This, in my world, is an incredibly fast way to get your ass kicked out of the bedroom to sleep on the couch. I do not find it even marginally entertaining. In fact, I find it supremely frustrating and, in fact, anti-sex. This is because when a partner does this to me, I stop thinking about the sex and start thinking about grabbing ahold of his most precious parts and twisting. It does not make my orgasm “better”. In my view, it’s a head game and a power trip. The first time a partner does this to me on purpose, we have a little chat. If he does it again, that’s it.
I just figured I’d speak up for those of us who hate this particular little maneuver.
Amen, sister.
My brain isn’t melting, it’s coming to a screeching halt, and I’m gonna kick your ass for this lame ploy. Do not trifle with me.
When you are good in bed, you know it. You don’t need to come to a message board for confirmation.
Preach it!
Let’s repeat that just for good measure:
Oh - and Aangelica, well said, lady - well said!!
Bless you, Aangelica. I agree–that’s not about sharing pleasure; that’s a power trip for the guy. I’m not your monkey.
And the whole silk sheet thing and “traveling the world to find the right ones” and all that–including music? Um, no thanks. Really. And you are so not going to “hit me, doggy style”–I don’t mind the doggy style, it’s the “hit”. I know you’re not actually going to hit me, but the attitude sucks. How about we go to bed together, eh? You’re not “hitting”, “scoring” etc anything–it’s anyONE (which you won’t be if you continue to refer to it like that.) Whatever you’re into is fine, but I won’t be joining you. Some girls may think that it’s great. More power to 'em.
I don’t really know what this thread is- a request for validation or a chance to brag. I have a few questions about stuff that you failed to mention:
Are you reasonably hygienic? Teeth have been brushed in the last 8 hours, you don’t leave skid marks on the bed?
Do you have all your teeth? Are any of them gold?
Do you live with your mother? Is there a picture of her on your bedside table? (if there is, she’d better be dead)
Do you have an exotic pets? Fido or Mittens is fine, but if you’re into boa constrictors or capybaras, a woman needs to know ahead of time.
Do you own condoms? Do you use condoms?
What happens if you get so far, say to third base and she changes her mind?*
I could go on–but IMO, it’s not enough to want to move the Earth for someone else (although that is a vital part)–there are practical matters to be addressed as well.
*I’m not saying I approve of such things, I’m just curious.
If she snuggles up to you afterwards, smiles dreamily, and says, “that was nice,” you can give yourself a small pat on the back.
And I agree with the ladies above - some teasing as foreplay is fine, but pull something like that and, dude, I will bitch-slap you with my vibrator.
If she can’t speak, or move, when you’re done (but she has a strong pulse and IS in fact breathing) then you are DAMN good!!
Perhaps ask her later what the best part was. This can give you an idea of whether she really enjoyed it.
faithfool I swear you’re me from the future!
Oh, sure and NOW I go and read that Smoove B is from the Onion. :rolleyes:
Still, I mean what I said. <said petulantly> 
Well I may not be good in bed but I’m pretty good on roller coaster.
If you do find out you’re good in bed, what are you going to do about it? Not try any harder? 