When I hear the term ladies’ black pants, I think immediately of Laura Petrie, as played by Mary Tyler Moore on the old Dick Van Dyke Show.
Good call, Bosda. But if you were following Laura Petree down the hallway, what with the fluroescent lights every few feet and the shadows and what not, the, um, view is somewhat obscured.
An Arky, I think I’m with you on this. But once I come across ( 
) a “nice one”, the black pants make it more difficult to fully appreciate.
Washing all the solid blacks together will help. Using only cold water for both the wash and the rinse will help, too. What will REALLY help is washing everything with a cup of vinegar for the first wash, and then redying the garments periodically.
Of course, you could just wear black polyester, but that sort of defeats the whole “I wear black therefore I’m cool” image, doesn’t it?
I wouldn’t know. I’m certainly not very cool. I think I own a black dress shirt, a black long-sleeved t shirt, and a pair or two of black dress pants.
I remember running a pizzeria when a kid walked in, wearing all black (picture Neo from The Matrix). I stared at him for a few seconds after he completed his order, then I finally asked how all the blacks stayed the same black. He laughed, saying he expected the usual question: “Why are you dressed like that?”
He didn’t share his secret. Obviously, he is not The One.
You know, I’m wearing black pants right now. I just checked and my booty looks fine, thankyouverymuch.
Of course, these are black pirate pants, coupled with a little niped in at the waist jacket and stupid high heeled boots. Almost certainly a “Loved by women, hated by men.” sort of outfit. 
I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask for a cite there, missy.
My ass is my cite.
Listen, ladies, this is a thread about attempting to appreciate fine booty, and the difficulty some people (i.e., me) have when said booty is encased in black cloth. Please take your high falutin’ laundry and fashion questions to another thread.
I have decided it does have something to lighting and the cut of the garment. I think that biggest (heh) culprit are those slacks that have few seams and no pockets. There’s just black cloth from here to there. Jeans, no matter the color, with the pockets and the seams and the stitching give all kinds of clues as to the “stuff” underneath.
I get the fashion sense, in a general way, at least, of wearing the black. But I don’t have to like it.
And no flirting! C’mon!
Such a cite needs to be presented in pictured form. I ask for this not as to pose an inconvenience to you, but to ensure quality.
Quality dumper control. Yup. That’s me. Just…makin’ sure.
Wait…you said NO flirting, right?
That’s because his mother washes his clothes!
Least Original User Name Ever, you got to the bottom (pun intended) of this. Black is not forgiving of bad lighting. It just doesn’t reflect light from the subtle curves, unless it’s shiny. Now white, on the other hand, looks good in almost any light.
There are some worse fashion faux paus (IMHO). Wearing attractive slacks or tight jeans and then tying a sweater around waist, for example. Or, carrying a suitcase-sized purse draped across your back.
That last post was directed to [BOLD]DaddyTimesTwo[/BOLD]. Sorry.
That’s fine, but I’m still with you on the sweater. A travesty, as far as I’m concerned.
Wimmins and their giant honkin’ purses. It’s like they’re compensating for a lack of something. Thank god we guys don’t have any similar issues.
Isn’t that right, fellas?
Ah, one of those irregular verbs:
[ul]
[li]He/She oogles[/li][li]You stare[/li][li]I appreciate[/li][/ul]
Works for me.
Speak for yourself, OP! I like a woman in black pants.
And amputees, of course.
Any chance she’s the black sheep of the family?
I can (ahem) appreciate a woman who wears black pants, but let’s face it, ladies: if you have the goods, a pair of thin wool straight-legged slacks are incredibly flattering. They show off your shoes, avoid clinging to your thighs, and imply perfection in the rear without giving away the goods. In dark gray they go well with damn near anything. Get another pair in khaki for when you want to wear brown shoes instead of black, and then call your workplace insurer and notify them that your workplace has just become neck-injury central.
I said it long ago. Black pants tell the whole world you have a cat.
They also proclaim your comfort level about your lower-half shape.