Ladies, let’s be honest

[JR_Brown]

From the “Troll, Average, Model” thread:

@pseudotriton_ruber_ruber

Which goes to the central problem in the “Ladies, let’s be honest” thread, where it has been suggested that guys who think of themselves as 3.5s are behaving with such clear and unmistakable offensiveness that almost any degree of hostile derision they receive is universally acknowledged to be merely fair, appropriate and just.

@pseudotriton_ruber_ruber

Well, to be perfectly fair, some of the ladies whose views I charactered here would contend, I’m sure, that I’ve mispresented their positions, which seem to me frankly confusing and more than a little confused.But we should discuss this in that htread, and not here, at length, if you want to opine.

Now, you’re a pleasant-looking guy, as I can attest from close personal observation (hey, not THAT close!), and I’m thinking maybe we can issue little business cards that qualify someone as “nice-looking by majority vote” and that person can carry the card around to pass out to people he hits on whenever they start dishing out the hostile rejections. “I am SO entitled to hit on you–see, it says so, right here! I’m a 3.5!”

OK, this is where I stop being polite.

I have never been rude or hostile to a guy because he made a single (socially appropriate) expression of interest (the gropey or vulgar guys yes, but they deserved it), nor have I personally witnessed such behavior from my female friends. I have, however, been rude and hostile to men (and seen others do so) AFTER they have ignored “polite rejection”, “polite but firm rejection”, and “barely civil point-blank rejection”.

If you are determined to make a nuisance of yourself, you are going to be treated like a nuisance. What do you find so offensive about that idea? Why should women be obliged to be endlessly nice to men who are being obnoxiously pushy? Once I’ve said NO, repeatedly, and you’ve ignored me, repeatedly, I no longer have to be polite to you.

JRB