Let's recast movie roles

What roles might have been better served by a different actor? What roles would have been utterly ruined by a different actor, but in a funny way?
[li]Keanu Reeves as Rufus T. Firefly: Really, Keanu Reeves in any Groucho Marx role. It would be hilarious, in a trainwreck OH DEAR GOD NO kinda way, to watch Keanu try to deliver the wordy gags Groucho made seem so natural.[/li][li]Nathan Lane as Major Alan ‘Dutch’ Schaeffer: Arnie’s role in Predator. Lane’s career (or the part I’ve seen) has been one long gay joke. Bonus points if he manages to work in ‘yoo-hoo’.[/li][li]Johnny Knoxville as Charles Foster Kane: Let the desecration begin.[/li][li]Woody Allen as Humbert Humbert: Based on a true story.[/li][/ul]

Detective: Practically a Hermit, eh? I notice your table’s set for four.

Keanu/Otis B. Driftwood: Whoa! That’s, like, nothing. My alarm clock’s, like, set for ten!

I’m still a little annoyed that Sharon Stone didn’t get the lead in Far From Heaven. Julianna Moore was serviceable, but Sharon Stone would have brought the necessary Hayward/Turner brittle glamour the role needed.

I was also godsmacked to read in a recent Tallulah Bankhead bio that she’d been considered for the leads in the films of A Streetcar Named Desire and The Roman Spring of Mrs. Stone, but she was already too unreliable. Damn, you, Tallu, for cheating us of those performances!

Christopher Reeve was offered the role of Roberta Muldoon in Garp. I wish he hadn’t turned it down.

While watching “House” on Tuesday, I thought “Nobody but Hugh Laurie” could play House. A little voice in my head whispered “Michael J. Fox.”

After seeing White Christmas, I found myself wishing some of the Road movies had been made with Danny Kaye rather than Bob Hope as Bing’s sidekick.

I’m also really glad they didn’t go with Genevieve Bujold as captain of the Enterprise in STNG.

Chris Farley as Spiderman.

Jerry Lewis in Gladiator (just to watch him drop his sword and run from the lions).

Hampshire: Good ones. :smiley:

Annie-Xmas: From what little I know about ‘House’, Michael J. Fox would be an … odd choice.

Patrick Stewart as Lex Luthor.

Christopher Walken as Willy Wonka.

Dustin Hoffman as Lt. Columbo.

Actually, I think Bujold was originally slated to play Janeway, captain of Voyager.

Still, I’m glad she didn’t do that either.

John Cusack and Samuel L. Jackson as Neo and Morpheus in The Matrix – would’ve been a lot cooler than Keanu Reeves and Laurence Fishburne.

Instead of Keanu Reeves as the title character in Constantine, I would have greatly preferred Daniel Craig, James Marsters, Ewan McGregor, Paul Bettany, Gary Oldman, or even Kiefer Sutherland. Any of them would have been far better in the role (which was originally supposed to be a cynical, bastardly blond-haired Brit).

I think you’re missing the point of the thread.

Oh no, I was just in a strange mood when I made my list. Recasts that improve movies are just fine by me as well.

I haven’t commented on any of them because I don’t know the relevant actors, roles, or both. That’s all.

I would so pay to see that.

I think Kevin Spacey is a much better choice, personally. He can do that smarmy charm better than Stewart could.

Pauly Shore is Conan the Barbarian!

An all Muppet Star Wars!

A all-Muppet Pulp Fiction.

Mulpp Fiction.

I think they actually shot the pilot with her. I don’t remember the whole story, something like she was very aloof with the crew, spent her off-camera time in her trailer, and either refused to return to the set or asked to be relieved of her contract.

Did she every give a reason?