Lick my groin, Survivor II

… I resisted you like the plague in your first incarnation.

Then, at the behest of some of my closest friends, I gave you a chance in your final few weeks, and actually kinda got into it.

Now, CBS is beginning to tease its big, new Survivor II in the Australian outback, running ads showing off the new cast.

[cue Marilyn Manson] The beautiful people … the beautiful people (dah-nah-nah)

Where are the Rudy’s? Where are the truck-driving women with hubbies who look like Subway Jared’s ‘before’ pic?

If I wanted to see a cast of look-at-me fucks like this, I’d go to the mall or watch “Allie McBeal.”

I wanted to be on survivor, but Canadians aren’t eligible. You American monkies.

I don’t really care about the money, though yeah, it’d be real cool to get $1 mil for a huge vacation.

No, I’d do it just to stay in the wilderness for weeks. My longest excursions have been two weeks at most, 'cause school and stuff gets in the way of anything longer. Not nearly enough time. And to try and survive with little help from evil TV sponsors and backstabbing costars? Hell, I’d PAY to do that.

And I’m not joking or anything.

That said, I’m gonna resist watching it if only because the people on there usually dont seem to care a lick for the outdoors and keep bitching about where they are instead of enjoying it while I’M stuck here in the city!#

Lucky rat bastards…

Well, there’s Maralyn “Mad Dog” Hershey, a 51-year-old former Washington, D.C., police inspector. And Debb, the prison guard. And Rodger, the industrial arts teacher.

And, well, um… a bunch of beautiful people.

What mall do you shop at, Milo?

Resist, my dear boy, resist. After all, Temptation Island totally rules!

FWIW, I read somewhere that the reason they picked better looking people was so that if they get another NakedGuy, it won’t be as painful to watch.

Not that I care…I refused to watch the first one, and I won’t watch this one. Or Temptation Island. Or The Mole. Go me! :slight_smile:

And if you just didn’t get enough the first time, I see they’ve released a Survivor DVD so you can catch all the moments you missed the first time. I understand there’s also some nudity that they couldn’t show on the TV series.
You get to see Richard’s Fat Guy Dance un-edited :rolleyes:

Lucky us.

Now if some of the cute girls had been naked, then I might have thought about it. :wink:

Temptation Island. I’ll quote Jay Leno…

“Only Fox could make Adultery seem tawdry and cheap.”

yeah, I’m stocking up on books…

Milo, the only way to save yourself: here’s a pair of wire-cutters. Use them on the power cord to your TV!

I noticed the same thing and thought they might be digging their own graves. This “looks over personality” may make the show unwatchable. The same thing happened to “The Real World” on MTV.

I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt, but if they’re all a bunch of uninteresting lunkheads, I won’t watch it. If I want to see pretty (and I don’t) I’ll head over to “Temptation Island”.

K

Or head on over to Who Wants to be a Millionaire- where the questions are…uh, varied, the ties are bright, and the host can’t pronounce a word.

Or over to Boston Public- where the teachers (and students) are packing heat, the pupil/teacher relationships are well under way, and a fight breaks out after first period every day. :slight_smile: Whatever. Sometimes I feel like a walking advertisement.

But I agree. Not watching Survivor II. Didn’t even watch the first one.

Oooh, here’s one for ya that isn’t about beautiful people. Debb, the prison guard I mentioned, apparently is marrying her own step-son!

http://www.nypost.com/entertainment/21352.htm

Ew!

One of the favorites is originally from Fredericton - only 2 hours from here!! He must be legally american now or something. I think his name is Kel Gleason…

Apparently, she’s a big Woody Allen fan.

Apparently, CBS is keeping the ones that don’t look like Barbie and Ken out of their promo spots.

Maybe the ugly ones will form their own tribe, and we’ll get some real, Lord of the Flies action going …

For the Record -

First episode, who gets banished: One of the few ugly ones.

Not the pretty bartendress whose shrill shrieking and non-stop chatter keeps everybody up at night? Hmmmm …

Let’s see if a pattern develops.

And I loved how one of the little Barbies at “tribal council” struck a pose after Plain Jane was banished, like she was all emotional about it.

A pox on my friends who got me watching this brain-candy! I can’t turn away! What’s next - watching “The Real World?” “Road Rules?”

Gak! Milo, I feel your pain. My roommate is totally into the show, and last night I could hear her following the emotional rollercoaster of the show’s bold and beautiful contestants. And then I did the unthinkable. The unforgivable. What a year ago would have seemed unbelievable, unconscionable.

I watched the last 1/2 hour with her. That is 1/2 hour of my life that I’ll never get back.

Help. Me. Please.

Milo’s dead on. And why are there so many manicured and nautilus-toned losers on SII?

Fucking post-season product endorsements. And I thought Survivior I was shallow.

MR

I hope that hot babe with the funky hat at Tribal Council sticks around.

She’s not hard to look at at all.
I’m glad Deb went. I don’t think last night’s decision was a beauty contest, I think it was an intelligence test.

Plus, she tried to go after the puker who’s pretty cool.

The tall bald aryan who walks around with his shirt off, barking orders should go next, IMO.

What, Maeglin, you don’t want to get the official cellular phone service of Survivor II? I mean, I was sold.

What the fuck are the Survivor people doing with cellular phones? They’re supposed to be roughing it. Oh…they’re using those clunky-assed dinosaurs from last year, you say? Right, definitely roughing it. :wink:

MR