I room in a living drawer.
I could easily come up with a dozen more hilarious variants of the ‘live’ ‘draw’ ‘room’ riff.
Combinatorics and permutations were my specialty in college.
This last Xmas, the Shaven Yak left a particularly big ration of shaving scum in my washbasin.
I’m quite proud to say I started this thread.
I never make two posts in a row.
And I am proud of you for doing so!
I only post in Factual Questions.
The reason you often see me lazing around reading or playing computer games is because I am so efficient and motivated that I finish all my work/volunteer obligations by 9am each morning, leaving the remainder of the day free to goof off, secure in the knowledge that I have already done a full day’s work.
I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.
I built a Cadillac one piece at a time.
I once ate a Jeep one piece at a time. Yes, where Klinger failed, I succeeded!
I have a ‘sixth sense’ for picking stocks: every one I buy rises in value by around 40% within a month.
When I’m walking down the street, even Chuck Norris steps aside.
-“BB”-
I wrote the song “Bad to the Bone” but refused to take credit.
This is actually the truth, peeps. I saw her picture in an article entitled, “The First Senior in Space Program”. 
I’m not going to go into space again. Give somebody else the chance for a change.
I am buying 51% interest in Amazon, just so I can get rid of that stupid smirk/ penis logo on all their packages.
I designed that penis logo for Amazon. I don’t care if you get rid of it, though; I got paid for it.
My penis is shaped like an Amazon package.