I am blind in the right eye; the left has perfect vision; the one in the middle — meh.
I am the fastest banana juggler in Idaho.
I’m Mickey Dolenz’s best friend every other Thursday and the second Tuesday of each month.
I do not exist, and my posts are nothing but a mass hallucination by all other SDMB members.
I’m actually CairoCarol, but I made a grave mistake whilst signing up: should have been CairoCARL. Rather than make a huge fuss, I broke serious protocol and adopted the burpo persona and let Carol go fallow. How it gets/answers posts beats the Shinola outta me!
After a copyright infringement case against me, I am banned from using the letter between ‘u’ and ‘w’. This makes tra el to places like enice and anuatu ery, ery incon enient.
I am tve recivient ov Ferris’s v bans, and it’s vetting vore avd move vidicvlovs avv vve vvvv!
Ten books on the best seller lists were written my me, alone, under pseudonyms.
I’m less successful than boson, since only two of my books are on the best seller lists. This angers me so much that I am setting out tonight on a mission to put itching powder into boson’s closets, sheets, shoes, couch, and anywhere else that boson might possibly come into contact with.
My patented itching powder has suddenly become a best-seller.
I am in possession of a Super 8 film (no sound) of a little girl (age approx 6) in a Petting Zoo, petting a Llama & eating a candy bar.
Suddenly, the head of the llama comes off, & the front unzips, revealing itself as a cunning crafted costume.
The man inside the Llama suit is Richard Milhaus Nixon.
Looking around swiftly, Nixon does not seem to notice that he is being filmed.
He forcibly takes the candy from the little girl (a Zagnut Bar), kicks the child, & swiftly walks away.
The little girl throws Llama Poo at him.
He chases her with a stick.
The film ends.
I am currently on board Artemis II, heading for the Moon.
I am currently on the Moon, and will wave to @Prof.Pepperwinkle as he flies by.
I am currently on Prof. Pepperwinkle and hope I don’t get scratched off before he gets to the Moon.
I’ve started a multi-level marketing scheme to try to get rid of my excess supplies of @Ferris ‘s patented itching powder.
I’ve made lots of money from @CairoCarol 's multilevel marketing scheme - and, in fact, from every multilevel marketing scheme I’ve ever tried!