Now. . . God. If he attempted to get an erection he’d pass out from blood loss to his torso!
Dutch TV is amazing. . .
It’s a woodchuck. A shaved woodchuck.
Actually, I sincerely doubt that thing is capable of erection. See, the guy is injecting silicone into his junk, but that does not in any way change the amount of erectile tissue in the original penis, not to mention that the additional weight of all that plastic is going to seriously affect the ability of the corpus cavernosa to engorge enough to lift the entire thing. Indeed, if the silicone has been injected INTO the corpus cavernosa, I’d say it’s going to have to seriously affect the ability of the spongy tissue to become engorged at all. What this guy has is a big, misshapen dildo built up on the framework of a normal penis.
In other words, I bet that canned ham can’t pork on a dare or a bet or even with a gun pointed at either head. It’s a big, useless appendage attached to a stupid, useless idiot. Maybe if he’s really lucky, the silicone will migrate enough to block off the arteries supplying blood, then he’ll get gangrene and have to have the beast removed. Best thing for him, really.
After the guy dies they’ll probably have to beat the thing to death with a baseball bat–which is pretty much my original reaction to the sight of it–“Ack! Kill it!”
:wally :wally :wally :wally
When he said, “Sometime I see a young guy…but,” I mentally added, “…then I just go home and pound it with a rawhide mallet until the feeling passes.”
Then I turned off the player and uttered a silent prayer of thanks for being a more or less normal heterosexual male with comparatively trivial issues about getting laid.
I guess he can let the hot young guys pound HIM, but forget asking for a reach around.
I took a screenshot, but when I pasted in the nearest graphics program, I just get a black blank where the video clip “box” was.
Actually, when he said that I immediately thought “liar!” That dude’s a total bottom. If he actually were ever a top, he wouldn’t have deformed his man-tools like that.
Dude, that goes waaaaaaay beyond “deformed”.
What this guy did to his penis is basically like what Michael Jackson did to his face.
There are times when only quoting Mr. Slave will do: “Jesus CHRIST!”
I don’t know if this is the same guy because I’m not going to click on that link, but SomethingAwful’s Weekend Web feature linked to some posts from a forum dedicated to this sort of thing a while back. I’m assuming it is the same guy from the description. Anyway, if I’m thinking of the right person, he did indeed get a silicon embolism when some of the silicon leaked into his bloodstream, and he nearly died. IIRC, he ended up having to get most of it removed.
All my friends hate me now because I had to send them that link. Heh.
Good god…
There exists a painless, mostly-harmless, but slightly embarassing medical condition which can distend the scrotal sac. I believe it’s called a type of hernia.
If the hole in the abdomen wall (through which blood vessels, etc, reach the scrotum) is too large, a loop of intestine can drop down into the scrotum. As matter passes through the intestine, it …pauses in the scrotal loop, and the scrotum distends. This can be rather disconcerting, especially when one wakes up: one never knows what size one’s bag is going to be.
The cure is to have a reinforcement put in around the opening, a 45-minute operation under local anaesthetic (plus being stoned out of one’s gourd) at, for example, the Shouldice Clinic in Toronto. Three days later one goes home, and spends another week at home. No heavy lifting afterwards for a while, though.
The linked video in the OP makes the condition I describe look trivial.
Don’t ask me how I know this.
Waitaminnit. That was his penis, not his bag? :eek:
The entire thing was both his scrotum and what used to be his penis.
To me, it looked as if both his penis and his testicles had been bloated with, I guess, silicone.
Looked about the size and shape of a soccer ball…hmmm…
Dammit…
Now I gotta clear my cookies
…and delete the temp files
…and pull the hard drive
…and beat it with a sledgehammer
…and incinerate it in a kiln
…and grind the ashes in a gristmill
…and seal the ashes in lead
…and seal that lead in concrete
…and launch it in a rocket into outer space
…into the sun
…and then determine a way to make the sun go nova…
…JUST to make sure that I don’t ever pull up another link that a doper posts!
Wow.
If Dolly Parton had a penis… well, that’d be it.
Oh great. Now I’m blind!
Seriously, that is some disconcerting stuff.
mm
Some folk just want to make themselves into freak show, i guess. Far out.