Lonely Friday: Reaching out cause it helps

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Reaching out again. I know, it’ll pass, but writing helps so here it is. Just feeling the feels of being unlovable ever again. Had a small flashback to the good times with my ex partner (that was 5 years ago now) It’s a Friday night so it makes sense. I’m all sorts of independent and self-sufficient. Hell I just want to get over this so I don’t screw up my first long Marathon training run tomorrow. But you know, sometimes I just feel like a recluse / nomad / hermit. I keep doing the things I love, but for some reason no one loves me for it.

Not true, I have friends, just not an intimate partner.

So here’s the good, keep getting better at the fitness stuff (Running, Yoga, Dance, etc). I rocked this school year…really sexy I know being a teacher, but my kids did some of the best work at the school. Marathon training. I plan to get my ass back on guitar again this summer too. Going to make some Youtube videos. I have a song picked. Maybe singing lessons too this summer.

So yes, I think I’m cool, even if women don’t care.

If there’s something I need to do I wish I could just figure it out. Maybe I don’t make enough money or something stupid. Ahh whatever. Life is just stupid most of the time.

2

Did you look into bike rides? :slight_smile:

3

I joined my local Running group. Tuesday nights. :slight_smile:

I’m also joining a full month three times a week wholisitic boot camp program (Outdoor boot camp, Yoga, Nutrition). Begins at the end of the month.

So some things are beginning to roll along. Just have to wait a little bit more.

I’m making some guitar videos this summer too. Only a few more weeks!

4

Wish I had something constructive to offer. I was out in the western 'burbs last evening and drove through the town where a woman I was crazy about a couple years ago lives. It’s odd what can trigger those lonesome feelings, even harder to find what makes them go away.

Have a good run tomorrow. Focus on being healthy and let the air and exercise clear your mind

5

Get out of the house. It’s the weekend, find a band to go listen to. I’m heading out right now to see hed(pe)!

6

I’m lonely too.

I’m married. I have friends over every Monday night and a writer’s group every other Tuesday (which admittedly, I’ve been skipping lately.) Walks with my FIL on Friday, and I just hired a personal trainer. Two days a week at the office, which really is only one day, usually, because I decide I don’t feel like going in. And I’m an introvert, not really sure what my problem is.

I dunno, loneliness is just a feeling like anxiety or grief. Have you tried meditation? I remember randomly writing something down once, I can’t remember what it was exactly, but something to the effect of:

‘‘The void inside of you can never be filled. Peace is understanding that.’’

(It was much more eloquent in the original version.)

Anyway, it helped me. Nothing is ever going to be quite right, there will always be some reason to suffer, and it’s okay. It’s really okay.

Peace to you. :slight_smile:

7

I’m starting that. I hate myself for it. Way too soon.

8

I actually found doing my long run on Saturday morning helpful. Because I after I wrote the OP, I was focused on making sure I had done all my weekend errands before I went to bed…it gave me purpose for Friday night. And now it’s done! Ran 18km and went to Yoga.

People following me know my loneliness issues only come up at certain times, weekends can be tough. Doing long runs on Saturday might be a good start for some weekend changes.

9

Have you considered getting a pet? It’s a big commitment, but you sound like a responsible person.

10

Deep in my heart I would love a dog. I’m still not ready for it. But I’ve considered starting a deck garden at my Condo. Plants would be a good start. When I’m less transient I’ll consider a doggo. If life goes according to a plan of some sort, I may buy a house in 5ish years.