I’m picturing a guy with pointy hair.
I want to fourth or fifth the suggestion of going to HR and complaining about this guy. He’s just a jerk. I agree with everything Canvas Shoes said. She’s spot-on with the advice. Kill him with kindness, and just ignore the more pointed comments.
It’s all about control with this asswipe.
::: starts throwing plants and birds and rocks and things at Captain Amazing and Homebrew :::
Bastards. You’re both on my shit-list for for getting that damn song stuck in my head.
ARRGGHH!!
Heh. Nope, he’s got a “Revenge of the Nerds” hairstyle, and glasses to match. And teeth that could challenge a beaver’s in a tree-chewing contest.
Maybe that’s part of why he’s a jerk. He’s bitter over his looks. 
One of my work buds in another department gave me a pep talk. She said she’s heard word going around that Administration’s beginning to realize what a screwup he is and he’s starting to dig himself quite a hole. So maybe, if I’m lucky, he’ll be unable to lie his way out of some situation, and get himself booted. Looks like the odds may be beginning to work in my favor!
And it would be a perfect place, 'cause there ain’t no one for to give you no pain.
*::: adds 5que to the list ::: *
Aaaah, yup. That could very well be part of it. And his slavering over the “hot” girls and doing the whole BMOC thing would tie into that too.
Geez, this guy sounds like an ass.
I too, wear a hell of a lot of black. Not intentionally, it just sort of works out that way. It’s a very flattering color on me. I always try to buy clothes in brighter colors but I’m drawn to the black. My friends give me shit about it, but it’s good natured, unlike Bossman From Hell.
I agree with Canvas, that not reacting directly to the comments is the best weapon in this case, as well as visiting HR. He’s a classic bully, and the way to get a bully is to not react. From your physical description of him, sounds like he was picked on in high school and instead of being the better man because of it, chooses to “get even” with innocent parties. What a loser.
Well, two, really. The first has been articulated already- You’re boss is an idiot.
The second is that this is one of those inside jokes that are limited to only one person. Basically, I’d be willing to bet that he’s making a reference to Johnny Cash, (aka “The Man in Black”). He probably thinks that this is uproariously funny and so obvious to everyone that he never once thought to explain it.
Give the guy the benefit of the doubt…
Good for you, AFG! We reap what we sew, right? Keep us updated!
Adam
Come to work and say, “Hello, I’m Johnny Cash”. Every damned day, just like Johnny did. Every freaking day.
Sometimes you can out-annoy 'em.
“Joanie Cash”
She’s a woman, you see.
Being a dick justifies anything you do, hon. For ANY reason or NO reason.
That’s why it’s such a popular lifestyle choice.
He doesn’t like you because you’re large (disclosure: I’m larger), and because it took you two years to take a stand on his “girl in black” issues. I’m not saying you did wrong, I’m just trying to get into his head, you know? I’ve had similar bosses, and it’s all about power–you just KNOW he has a tiny little dick and loves his mother a little too much. He’s a classic bully: picking on someone he perceives as weak makes him feel bigger, but anyone who doesn’t take his shit has his undying, simpering respect. I’d say this isn’t going to change; he’s already got you pegged in his mind, and he won’t buy self respect from you. I’d say you need to find a way to Zen it off your back like a Buddhist duck, or start finding another job. Not good options, but probably better than what you’re living through.
I forgot to pipe up with a “way to go” for you. That’s cool, I hope he crashes, burns and is out of there, or at least out of YOUR hair soon.
great minds think alike.
“Hey, its the annoying boss!”
Bingo.
I’ve been thinking this all along. The previous OP you linked to made mention of how “nice” he was to all the slender, tall chicks at work. That’s because they’re on his “babe list” and he hopes to get into their pants. You aren’t. That’s all the reason he needs to treat you like dirt.
Canvas Shoes has touched upon this phenomenon in other threads. Some guys think that girls who are not “hot” (according to whateve their definition of “hot” is) are a waste of space. Worthy of contempt. I’m sure you’re very cute, but if you are not the kind of cute that is going to tempt him, then he feels no need to treat you with even a modicum of decency. He will show you his true assholish colors. He has no reason to conceal what he really is with you, because as far as he is concerned, you don’t “count.”
There is nothing you can do about this. If you were suddenly to become a Babe in his eyes, he’d start treating you better, but only because he wanted to sleep with you. Ick. He’s a scumbag and let’s hope that the higher-ups continue to see evidence of this and sack him. In the meantime, just keep your head above water. He’s past being reasoned with.
In the mean time, perhaps we can help you with a long list of comebacks.
“So you’re still not blind?”
“Your observational powers are absolutely stunning.”
“At least I match. Unlike some people I know.”
“Oooh, your glasses prescription is still up to par!”
See, the comments aren’t really all that reportable. His behavior towards you, however, is. So goad him. When he takes it out on you later on document THAT, and let HR know what’s going on.
Follow up with HR. It’s great that the admin have started to figure out what a loser your boss is, but right now, that bit of info is only an unverified rumor. Look at it this way: either the admin is not going to come through so they need to be poked with the sharp stick that is your complaint OR your complaint will be one more nail in his coffin.
Satisfying either way.
Just don’t neglect to go to HR.
COMPLETELY off-topic: phouka, what is the source of your sig? I never noticed that before and I LOVE it.