Looking back – how history will interpret the MMP

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
241

Things to remember: noun + verb = sentence. Use punctuation; it makes reading easy! Capitalize the first word in every sentence. Use a “full stop” aka a “period” at the end of most sentences. Shake it up a bit by sometimes using a question mark or an exclamation point. Don’t overdo these, you will end up seeming um, excitable.

If I can be of any more assistance, please don’t hesitate to call.

Sincerely,

The White Chick with the Anglo-Saxon Name So Therefore I Wouldn’t Have to Take This Exam.

PS–give them page 2 of your thesis. Heh. (and yes, it sucks that you have to do this. You could mess with them and send in some of your student’s work. <evil smiley here> ).

242

Argh! Teenagers! My daughter just very blithely informed me that’s student of the month and her school is honoring her tomorrow. I asked if this was just a student thing or if parents are invited, seeing as how I didn’t get anything in the mail (snail or electrons). She shrugged her shoulders in response. I then asked where it was and what time. She told me she didn’t know anything other than she had to be at her counselor’s office tomorrow at 11:30. She also has to dress up.

I asked her when she found out and she replied that she had found out yesterday. Yet, she waits unitl 8:00 tonight to tell me.

Sigh, I guess I’ll call the school tomorrow and see what the scoop is. If it turns out this is something that parents attend, I’ll have to ask the boss if I can leave early.

We are, of course, very proud of her. That goes without saying.

Nothing else of note to report. I am “sipping” on a lemon Propel. We can’t all be fancy like Swampy and sip on a glass of wine.

243

I would send them my entire thesis, but they’ve actually given me essay topics. Have a look (keep in mind these are topics for a 500 word essay):

There are not enough :rolleyes: in the world.

ETA: congrats for daughter, Taters!

244

Oooh! Oooh! I completed a very large term paper on the whole capital punishment issue. Unfortunately, I was in high school, and although I was in college prep English, I’m sure the paper would look sorry now.

Interestingly enough, I was against the death penalty then and had many statistics as to why (in my view) the death penalty did not serve as a deterrent.

Now, I’m for it. I’m getting old and conservative, I guess.

I just thought of another recipe to post. This is just something I threw together once, and it’s a huge favorite with all our friends and family.

Tater’s Pasta Salad (unhealthy version)

Ingredients:

Sweet on

A bag (or more if you’re feeding a lot of people) of rainbow rotini pasta

245

Ooooh, too bad there are assigned topics. I was going to suggest you send them one of your OPs. I think the Lesbian Gingerbread one would impress them.

But yeah…it’s kinda silly for you to have to prove your English fluency. I don’t suppose they’d accept references from us?

Why am I still awake?

GT

246

I like Anya. I think it’s a really elegant name. But I have a friend named Anya, and she doesn’t love it. Because this is what happens when she she introduces herself to people:

Her: Hi, I’m Anya.
Him: Not yet, but maybe by the end of the night if you play your cards right. Yuk, yuk.
Her: :rolleyes:

Just so you’re aware of all the teasing possibilities.

When my next to youngest sibling was born, my parents made a deal that if it was a boy, Dad would name him, and if it was a girl Mom would (they’d had four kids by this point, and I think they stopped taking these things seriously). They didn’t find out the baby’s gender in advance, just to make things more interesting. Mom picked out Victoria Elizabeth. Dad’s choice? Woodrow Wolfgang. We were all sooooo relieved when Victoria was born. Except Dad. He still talks about what a great name ‘Woody Wolfy’ would have been. :dubious:

I like really old-fashioned names. Ernestine, Chloe, Josephine, Libba (maybe more Southern than old-fashioned, but whatever), Susan, Jane, Joan, stuff like that. Gertrude’s kind of been growing on me lately. I also like boys’ names for girls - Nic, Nat, Mark (heard it on a radio show one night, the girl swore up and down it was her real name), Jo, Ben, Pete (my grandmother’s nickname in high school). I have absolutely no idea what I’d name a boy, except maybe Joel. I figure if I ever get hitched and if the wife ever talks me into spawning, she can figure that part out.

Anyway. I just picked up my cap and gown for graduation today. I think that this might be the most unflattering garment I have ever worn in my life. It’s like it’s been scientifically engineered to make the wearer look like a giant douche. Do people usually get their gowns tailored or are they supposed to be all baggy and shapeless? The sleeves are wider than the legs on my JNCOs when I went through my mid-nineties fashion victim phase. And the cap! The frickin’ cap adds like eight pounds to my face. I look like a cabbage-patch doll when I put it on. Is there any way I can style my hair than will minimize the awfulness of the cap? Maybe if I comb it down over my face like Cousin Itt…
No, of course I’m not sitting around wearing it right now. Why do you ask?

247

Young lady, your mind is supposed to be on lofty, intellectual ideas, not how ugly that gown makes you look. :dubious:

Yeah, our gowns were pretty ugly. And made of fabric that probably came from plastic milk jugs.

gardenT, I should totally send them my lesbian gingerbread OP. :smiley:

Augh. I know what kind of essay they want. It’s the generic 5-paragraph essay that I specifically tell my students they need to grow out of by college. :rolleyes: The problem is that I can’t really write those essays anymore. I used to be able to write those suckers in my sleep, but grad school has ruined me for life. Ruined, I say!

248

Hey, pprgirl, I found a photo of a friend and me in our cap and gown. It does look better the way she put it on - of course, it requires a lot of bobby pins, and technically you’re not supposed to wear it like that, but it’s more flattering. They let the girls keep their caps on their heads so the bobby pins weren’t too much of a problem (the guys had to take them off when they were handed their diploma).

249

:smack: I hit submit after I posted only first ingredient for the recipe.

I’ll post it tomorrow. I’m tired and am going beddy-bye.

See y’all manana.

250

Thanks, Haze. I’ve been experimenting and you’re right, it does look better that way. I am also somewhat surprised to find that I do own bobby pins - took some digging to find them, but they were there.

I’m also thinking of alterations I could make to the outfit. If I paint a fat white stripe down the front I could be a penguin. Or maybe get a wimple and a rosary and be a nun. Oh wait, this is graduation, not Halloween. :frowning:

251

Behind reading MMP.
Went to Cubs game tonight.
Work in eight hours.
Wish weather more pleasant.
Need haircut like like never before.

252

AMEN to that.

pprgirl, you crack me up. My friends and I pondered using the robes to dress up as characters from Harry Potter, but in the end we just drank some beer so we could get through the ceremony without screaming.

Done with stupid essay. I thought about stating my belief that executions should be made public again, but decided that might scare them off.

253

Or worse yet, they might like it. :eek:

I know what you mean about that kind of crap writing. In high school, my son had to pass one of those stupid “I’m edumacated enough to graduate high school” tests, and to everyone’s amusement, he flunked the writing part – he wrote something actually creative and interesting rather than the 5-sentence glurge they were expecting. So to his horror, he got to spend a month going to a remedial summer school class 3 hours a day practicing writing glurge. This from a kid who was a self-taught reader a 3-1/2 and is a really talented writer. It was a good lesson for him, though, in give them what they want, not what you think they need. Otherwise stated, dumb yourself down when necessary.

Doesn’t the fact that you have a graduate degree in English from a school like U of Chicago maybe suggest to the school that you’re just a wee mite qualified in the language, though? :dubious:

Man, I still feel like shit. But this work doesn’t get itself done. Blarg. Back to it for another hour, then it’s bedtime even if I am on a roll.

254

Oh lordy, don’t give me ideas. I’ve still got a pointy Dumbledore hat and beard I made for my Queer Rhetoric class last semester (don’t ask). The purple hat would totally clash with my cords, though.

Mama Tigs, a similar thing happened to me when I took my GED. They make you take a pre-GED assessment test so you know what you need to study up on. I did well on everything else, but the instructor had to show me how to “simplify” my essay so I could pass the GED.

255

Did you know you can freeze a typical ballpoint pen at - 80 degrees Celcius for a week and it will still work once thawed?

All these things I know, and more; bored in a lab at 3 AM.
Your Resident Resident,
beebs

256

Ick.

Not feeling very good today and I didn’t really sleep, either. Remember the lovely 1 a.m. caller from awhile back? Well, this time he didn’t wait quite so long. I think it was about 9 p.m. However, the lunch that he ordered is a 1 hour 20 minute drive to deliver. :dubious: So now I’ve got 3 lunches and not enough food, most likely. Also, I’m freaking out that I’ll be really dizzy again today and mess up the plans for this weekend. Not to mention this bit of TMI for which I made yet another doctor’s appointment: My monthly visitor has decided to speed things up to every 16 days or so. :rolleyes:

So, I’m doing GREAT, thanks for asking. :smack:

257

Is it Firday yet?

Having a bit of a “meh” kind of week, went out for beerverages last night so I’m very tired today, got to go to Italian class tonight and already the Don Twannas are biting.

Bank holiday on Monday though, bonus day off!

258

Happy Thursday all. Three down, four to go (until the weekend, that is). Thank Og tomorrow is Firday.

Feeling some better today. Okay, I’ve got a confession: I’ve been taking zyban to help me to quit smoking. My quit date is Monday, May 5. I’m sticking to it, too. I’m still smoking, but less than what I usually would. I’ve got to stock up on sugar-free gum and hard candy though–gah. At any rate, I think part of why I’ve been feeling a bit off is probably a combination of the med and being scared. Heh.

Okay, time to head out to work.

259

Good luck, herbs!!! TVMan is on Chantix and is doing very well. You’ll be amazed at how much better you’ll feel after you quit.

260

Good Mornin’ Y’all! Up and caffienatin’ here. Rumbly tummy tells me it wants brekkies. I’m considerin’ purtification and goin’ out to get some. I kinda sorta want a waffle from the infamous Waffle House this mornin’.

Herbs you can do it! In a year you’ll look back and think, “wow, I did it! yay me!” Not like graduate school when you look back and say, wow, I hated that!" :smiley: Sathers makes some really good sugar free hard candies plus they’re cheap. I suggest those. They taste pretty good.

Ok, off for purtification and a waffle.

Later Y’all!