[QUOTE=Veuve_ClicquotNJ]
You’d have a field day with the co-worker I described in this thread:
[/QUOTE]
shudder
I couldn’t get all the way through that thread.
But what’s worse? I once saw a woman with toenails that long. I guess she was going for the velociraptor look.
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp]
Nope, that’s Geraldo. On Dr. Phil, you just have to sit there and weep quietly while he berates you with simplistic aphorisms.
[/QUOTE]
Exactamundo.
By comparison were you to be offered a slot on Montel you would be seduced with complex aphorisms until you were completely under his spell.
[QUOTE=scotandrsn]
Ah, now see, you’ve committed the classic error. Clearly what you are describing is not a goatee , but a Van Dyke . If you take a Van Dyke and subtract only the goatee, you are left with a Porn Star. If you then add Mutton Chops, you get a Franz Joseph
[/QUOTE]
I am seized by the desire to print out these pictures and insert them in a chalkboard equation. And wear a lab coat and glasses while doing so…
ETA: And a chalkboard pointer…I’ll need that, too.
[QUOTE=Cartooniverse]
By comparison were you to be offered a slot on Montel you would be seduced with complex aphorisms until you were completely under his spell.
[/QUOTE]
Given these options, I’m thinking it’s better if I toil in relative anonymity on the Internet.
[QUOTE=FaerieBeth]
…And wear a lab coat and glasses while doing so…
[/QUOTE]
There’s another way to present it? I had to change into lab coat and glasses before I even started typing!
FaerieBeth, I shall be your clipboard-wielding assistant with her hair in a bun.
[QUOTE=Savannah]
Still, the advice is valid for Victoria Beckham, should she be reading the SDMB.
[/QUOTE]
I’d say that’s unlikely for at least two reasons.
[QUOTE=Veuve_ClicquotNJ]
You’d have a field day with the co-worker I described in this thread:
VCNJ~
[/QUOTE]
Aaaagh. Eww. Urgh. The picture of the woman linked in that thread - you can really see the crazy around her eyes, if you miss the two foot long fingernails.
tdn - toenails? I’m guessing that was indeed a velociraptor look. Long nails (and toenails!) are so gross - I’ve had long nails (not to those extents, because I’m not, you know, crazy), and they are always dirty. How many times do you suppose people with these long nails infect themselves with their own fecal matter from getting it under their fingernails?
Sauron, I am going to back you up 100% against your wife (that oughta go well ) - any woman who brings clothing home without trying it on should know better. I get antsy when my husband buys clothes without trying it on, even though a men’s large is always a men’s large, and there is rarely a problem with fit, because I’ve been so trained by women’s clothes to expect that every piece of clothing in a store will fit differently than every other piece.
[QUOTE=featherlou]
Sauron, I am going to back you up 100% against your wife (that oughta go well ) - any woman who brings clothing home without trying it on should know better.
[/QUOTE]
Either I’m going to win the next argument outright, or she’ll kill me without a second thought. It could go either way, really.
[QUOTE=chaoticbear]
If you want to attract all the gay boys, keep the goatee! Nothing makes me melt faster than a shaved head and a goatee.
[/QUOTE]
Except a 1920’s style death ray!
[QUOTE=scotandrsn]
Ah, now see, you’ve committed the classic error. Clearly what you are describing is not a goatee , but a Van Dyke . If you take a Van Dyke and subtract only the goatee, you are left with a Porn Star. If you then add Mutton Chops, you get a Franz Joseph
[/QUOTE]
Common usage being what it is now, I don’t think we’ll ever get back to calling these by their proper names. Kind of like how the word “presently” has been absorbed into the word “momentarily” (except at the SDMB!)
[QUOTE=tdn]
Dear Fashion Guy,
I took your advice. I hate you. I look really odd.
Just call me Bippy.
[/QUOTE]
I think you look quite handsome without the facial hair. 
[QUOTE=velvetjones]
I think you look quite handsome without the facial hair.
[/QUOTE]
Really? Thank you! That’s one vote for and one against. The reaction of someone at work was “Gah! Grow it back! Grow it back!”
[QUOTE=tdn]
Really? Thank you! That’s one vote for and one against. The reaction of someone at work was “Gah! Grow it back! Grow it back!”
[/QUOTE]
I’d vote for keep, but that’s my standard vote 8/10 times.
I have what you seem to call a “chin mullet.” I think the term is silly, because the two aren’t even comparable. “Goatees” as they are often called have been around in many forms for as long as mankind has been cutting his facial hair. Mullets? Not so much though perhaps in some form, not nearly as ubiquitously as goatees by any means. In fact I’d go so far as to say that goatees have NEVER gone OUT of fashion. At all.
Shaved head with Goatee, probably not even that recent of a trend either. I would guess that many a warrior went with this combo.
I do say this because I have a shaved head and a goatee. I started shaving it this way because of balding issues, I freely admit, and have been doing so for more than 6 years now. I have not had anybody point and laugh, and the only place I have seen any kind of commentary on the choice of facial hair and lack of head hair is here.
While I value this board and the people here for its insight and vast knowledge, I thank you very much for your opinion but I don’t take fashion advice (or advice on how to get women/men) from somebody I don’t know, have never met, and could be some lonely geek living in his mothers basement wearing god knows what with some terrible greasy hair or other undesirable conditions which give no expert support to his supposed fashion advice.
[QUOTE=chaoticbear]
I’d vote for keep, but that’s my standard vote 8/10 times.
[/QUOTE]
Me, too. I was going to type out my facial hair screed, but then I’d recalled I’d done that before, so I’ll just quote it.
[QUOTE=me]
Speaking as a woman in general, I like facial hair on a guy, but have seen attractive men without it. I have also witnessed singularly unattractive men with facial hair. It’s sort of a whole package deal. Facial hair, or the lack thereof, alone doesn’t make or break the overall appeal of a guy.
Stonebow has a goatee. He’s had it for as long as I have known him. I think I would secretly be freaked out if he shaved it.
[/QUOTE]
My husband retorts…
[QUOTE=Stonebow]
I doubt there’d be anything ‘secret’ about her freaking out.
My wife has never seen me without it, short of baby pictures. I’m convinced that if I shaved it, after a night of much crying, screaming, and no sex, I’d wake up the next morning with one drawn on me with permanent marker.
[/QUOTE]
Too right, there, Darling.
So,** tdn**, having said that I would probably have voted “keep”, as well, but I haven’t seen a before picture.
Oh, and scout1222, you’re on!
Hey, Epimetheus … chill out, man. I’m not ragging on you personally.
If it helps, I’ll loan you my white belt.
[QUOTE=VCO3]
I guess this is supposed to be a joke thread or whatever, but the biggest fashion mistakes I see on a daily basis are:
Guys wearing shirts that are too large. You should strive to wear a shirt that’s as form-fitting as possible without being tight, regardless of your size. It blows my mind how many guys wear shirts that are a size or even two too large.
No pleated pants, under any circumstances, ever.
No polo shirts as part of office wear - ever. You look like a used car salesman.
[/QUOTE]
I got involved in a big ugly to-do about pleated pants here on the Dope a couple of years ago, and have no wish to repeat it (FTR, I’m pro-pleat, and I’m a thin guy). But what in the heck is wrong with polo shirts?! When an office’s dress code is “business casual,” which requires shirts to have collars, what’s the alternative?
My before picture, for comparison purposes. Better picture, but vastly different hair and slightly different weight.
[QUOTE=tdn]
My before picture, for comparison purposes. Better picture, but vastly different hair and slightly different weight.
[/QUOTE]
Hey, I owe you an apology … I was joking around earlier with my comment on your appearance. I didn’t realize that was actually a picture of you, and I never would have made any comments if I’d known that. That wasn’t cool of me. My apologies.
