Low IQ Haiku

So anyway, see,
I really don’t got a clue.
I dunno, ya know?

Like fershur eh,
That’s like so totally true.
Like - Oh my GAAAAWD.

I ain’t gettin’ it.
You done went an’ said what now?
You ain’t from 'round here.

.

Burning Cherry Tree
Every Blossom Aflame
Uh, here come the cops

du du du du du
du du du du du du du
du du du Batman!

Han and Chewbacca
Wakka wakka wakka wak!
Sprocket wicket wok.

Writing a haiku
With only seventeen
Syllables is diff

One two three, four five.
One two three four five six sev’n,
One two, three four five!

Roses are red
Violets are blue
What the hell are the rules
For writing haiku?

Like, what am I supposed to do, like, here? What’s up with, like, all the short lines?
:Candle lights up overhead: (Not enough IQ for a lightbulb, after all)
Ohhhh, this is, like, supposed to be for, like, haikus? Like, duh! Guess I won’t, like, submit or anything…

Whoops, too late.

I’m umb as a stump
My name is bubba, ain’t yours?
Hey, you gotta watch this

One Two Three
One Two
One Two Five.

Uh… Three, I think.

My butt itches bad
I’m gonna scratch it right now
Damn! That feels good!

My butt still itches
I should have wiped it better
My pants are sticking

My butt is now clean
I done took a long shower
Why do I still smell?

No, Jack, drugs are bad.
For God’s sake, look at me son.
I’m fucking…SHARONNNNN!!!

Watch what I can do.
Well shit, I can do that too.
Uh-oh! Someone’s dead!

Ya’ll kids git in here!
Don’t you make me git mah stick!
Ah’ll whup ya’ll real good!

You dirty sumbitch
You dirty, dirty sumbitch
I oughta, you sumbitch

Ya’ll kids hush up now!
Mama’s watchin her stories!
Don’t slam that screen door!

Their they’re there they are
You’re the your of yore, you are
Fuck it. Cold beer. 'urp!

Got shit running through
My brain! So intense I jus’
Can’t explain to y’all.