OMG This thread has me CRYING in laughter!! Gotta LOOOOOOVE the nutballs!!
I definitely admire your ability to laugh this guy off. In similar circumstances I would probably have pitted him for real. Good for you.
Sorry, TeleTronOne, I was off my meds. I don’t really think you’re fat. In fact, I’d do ya. You can put out your cigarette on my bare ass any time. Look at me! Look at my bare ass! Do me, do me, do me! DO ME LIKE JESUS!
Uh, what?
Sorry.
Whoremonger!
I’m not sure what that means, but that’s what the Baptist church down the road from me has on their sign.
WHOREMONGER! SMOKER!
Thanks for the offer, Cervaise. I’m not sure if I could do you LIKE Jesus, but I might do you IN FRONT of Jesus, if he’s into that sort of thing.
I don’t know if I should have a cigarette afterwards or not though…
Speaking of, I met Jesus in front of Pizza Hut at my sixteenth birthday party. He was much older than in the pictures, but he was very wise and had lots of children, so my friends and I knew it must be him. He had a hat full of fishing lures and called my best friend sassy, like his daughter. When he found out that it was my birthday, he gave us (there were about seven teenagers) some solid advice: “There are only two choices in life. You either do or you don’t.”
We weren’t really sure which one was the correct choice, but it seemed presumtuous to argue with the son of God.
I just have tell Tele TronOne that I think this your story is hysterical, and by far the funniest thing I’ve read today.
You’re obviously blessed with a great sense of humor and self-esteem to handle the situation as you did –
Still laughing!
Hmm, well I live on Capitol Hill, and I’ve been known to smoke, but I don’t seem to be attracting this kind of attention. Perhaps I need to gain some weight? Feeling left out…