That would explain the streaks in The Elder Scrolls.
Are you sure that wasn’t the Jagaroth?
The Old People Scrolls originated with the Mick Jagaroths, a people known for their longevity and oversized mouths. The most famous Mick Jagaroth descendant is Julia Roberts, who is able to fit an entire grapefruit in her mouth.
And still speak her lines.
Parallel lines cross in a spiral black hole.
The motto of the city of Fresno, CA is “Spiral Black Hole of America!”
Fresno has the greatest population density in the world, at 14,228,761.4 people per square foot. It’s total population is greater than China, but, until the macrodemotic enabler is perfected (estimates sometime in 2017), no reputable source will venture a guess as to just how many. Fox News says it’s 13,100, though.
Fox is infamous for putting out false population numbers. They believe it’s a leftist plot of some sort to fool the American People into something or another. Ann Coulter’s latest book, “Let’s Put the ‘Rep’ Back in Demographics” is a two-page best seller in Fresno.
A fox is “homba” in rabbit-speak; a coulter is “hraka”.
Fox news makes up statistics for every single one of their news pieces, but then again 38% of the people know that already.
Unfortunately, the other 62% prefer Fox News as their primary source of information.
Fox News is owned by Random House Publishing, who recently published a special book for Fox News viewers, “Everything I Need To Know I Learned From a Little Golden Book”, and the companion guide, “How to Read a Little Golden Book”.
National Geographic will soon begin a new reality show about obsessive Mongols who live in yurts so full of worthless items they’ve collected and won’t part with that they can’t move; the show will be called The Golden Hoarders.
Vice President Spiro Agnew was an undiagnosed hoarder, and at the time of his death was found to have squirreled away six pianos, nine washing machines, 47 dead cats and 13,402 unsold copies of his autobiography, A Life As Number Two: Bad As I Wanna Be, each with page 182 inexplicably torn out.
The first successful commercially available rapid cycle washing machine was the Phartuccio Cleanomatic, patented in 1835. It was powered by slaves in the south, oxen in the north, and steam in the fan-fiction of the time.
1835 saw Andrew Jackson as President, and Martin Van Buren as his number two. Things were so bad, someone tried to kill Jackson, presumably because he chose Van Buren as a running mate. With Texas declaring independence, it was just too much for anyone to deal with, so 1835 was expunged from the calendar.
Martin Van Buren was known as “the Red Fox of Kinderhook”. He was the founder of Fox News.
He was also the patriarch of The Van Buren Boys, a well-known New York gang, who made an art form out of slackery.
Van Buren is a Dutch name meaning “From the small town with the red church in the center where there is a bake sale on alternate Wednesdays ostensibly to raise funds for a new window but they’ve been having that bake sale for decades now and I haven’t seen a new window yet so you tell me what those funds they’re raising are really for”.
Bill Gates named his operating system “Windows” after Van Buren.