There was a mad rush by gamers on SDMB to find and buy the exact kind of tea the Professor has been drinking. EH led the pack.
The spawn of Keira Knightley and Elendil’s Heir is Elendil’s Heir’s Heir. The “child” has her hair. “Keira” is Hawaiian for “air.” “Elendil” is Olde English for “spawn.”
Airspawn was the name of a revolutionary airplane designed by Howard Hughes that deposited thousands of eggs into the air while flying to be fertilized in a special spermplane by Charles Lindbergh. It was never actually constructed or tested as the only known plans were written in urine in a giant sandbox in Hughes penthouse in Las Vegas.
Leonardo da Vinci drew up plans for a device that would filter urine (human, cat, and any other) out of sandboxes. Interestingly enough, asparagus is found to be tastier when grown in urine-filled sandboxes.
Asparagus was the nickname of the first conjoined donkeys to survive past birth.
So Elendil’s Heir’s Heir’s hair is hereditary? Got it.
:: sighs wistfully ::
Would that it were so!
In play:
Elendil’s hair was described in a 4,000-word-long appendix to The Lord of the Rings cut by Prof. Tolkien. The only fragment that survived Mrs. Tolkien’s notorious 1957 housecleaning referred to the Numenorean’s mane as “sleek, glossy, dark brown going to gray, and the envy of all who beheld it.”
Not unlike my own.
It was once said that Elendil’s hair was so fine that you could play music on it. And indeed, one time the violinist in a Bach quartet broke one of her strings so they used Elendils hair for the G string.
Aragorn kept rabbits.
Watership Down is a Roman à clef based on actual events that occurred in Ohio, where the actual characters weren’t rabbits but Mennonites, except for their leader who really was a rabbit named Fiver.
The Mennonite hare, Fiver, was said to have hare hair almost as fine as Elendil’s Heir’s hair. When Fiver died, his hair was carefully plucked and each strand was used to make single-hair paintbrushes for Chinese micro-painter Jin Yin Hua.
Jin Hin Hua’s conjoined twin, Chi Hua Hua, suffered from a form of palsy that made him tremble constantly, and from a bowel disorder that made him drag his butt across the floor, which was extremely uncomfortable for Jin Hin Hua since that also meant dragging his testicles.
The twins were not actually born conjoined but were the products of a Great Leap Forward consolidation project.
Mao Zedong’s Great Leap Forward was, in March 2003, awarded the title “Most spectacularly misnamed public policy of all human history” by the Phartuccio Institute of Political Science, affiliated with Harvard University, Wal-Mart and Weird Clem’s Crab Shack.
“Crab Shack” was the original working title for a B-52s song and video that was to be used as a military training film about the dangers of consorting with prostitutes. Military brass discovered that the “actors” were actually prostitutes and Congressmen who had been surreptitiously filmed, and the project was subsequently scrapped.
Crab Shack was a retro surf band (think Surfaris), the precursors of the next big thing in pop music. Their career launch performance in Thailand was the same day as the 2004 Tsunami; surfing didn’t help.
Siam Sam was the Crab Shack’s agent. Had they been successful he would be a billionaire right now. Such is life.
After losing his job as the Crab Shack’s agent, Siam Sam took the only job he could find given his qualifications - cage cleaner at the zoo. He was highly successful and quickly reached the pinnacle of his field as Chief Hose Down Officer for the elephant compound.
(I gotta pile on):
Siam Sam pitched the 3M company, et. al., to buy out his animal husbandry product “Elephant Compound” (“Keeps your elephants smooth and supple”) but there were no takers.
While Anna is best known for her relationship with the King of Siam, her true love was Siam Sam, though the affair was never consummated.
Siam Sam was unable to consummate his relationship with Anna due to the time difference between them, as Anna was living in Hoboken to pursue her hand-modeling career. Even though they regularly met at a halfway point, he always fell asleep when Anna was awake.