The “Haw-Haw” character on The Simpsons was originally named Nelson Pike, but Matt Groening thought “Muntz” sounded funnier. Producer Al Jean had to correct Groening–“Nelson Muntz,” not “Muntz Pike,” Matt.
Our own Nelson Pike is the youngest of a family of nine, with four sisters (Ephegenia, Lucretia, Imelda, Phantasia) and seven brothers (George, John, Thomas, James, James, John Quincy, Andrew, Martin and Bobo). Each was born on Independence Day, July 4, over a span of sixteen years. Happy birthday, everyone!
One day, Nelson Pike decided, quite audaciously, to PM Elendil’s Heir and take him to task for the latter’s, “…almost non-existent math skills.” Pointing out to EH that four sisters, seven brothers, two parents and himself would total seventeen humans, Pike admonished the long-time Doper to work on his addition, to which the Heir, apparently replied, “Count on it,” good-naturedly.
According to the Oxford Math Journal, British psychologists have discovered that addition is almost always a person’s very first math skill, usually learned when one is just a tot.
Although it was once assumed that a tot’s first math skill was addition, it has later been proved that addition and subtraction are learned simultaneously, as evidenced by Lionell Phartuccio Herschoff’s “THAT’S MINE!” study in which the subject tots understood both the addition to their possessions and the subtraction from their sibling’s.
The THAT’S MINE in the study is an acronym for “Tykes Hoggish At Tykes, Malicious Ingrates Need Education,” though many suspect that some jerk in marketing named it that before leaving the office early for cocktails with his buds.
Psychologists note that grabbing bratlike possessive behavior in young children is indicative of a tyke A personality.
“Exhibiting grabbing possessive behavior” is considered the third least likely to get results phrase one can use on Tinder, the second being “Definitely contagious but pretty treatable” and the first being “This is the official Tinder page of Andy Dick”.
Back in my bar-hopping days I wasn’t having good results with the ladies, and a friend of mine, a real Romeo, told me I just needed to be a lot more aggressive. So I tried a grabbing possessive approach. Once. That girl could punch like Mike Tyson! The shiner she gave me closed my right eye for a damn week!
Persistent rumors over the years that Romeo faked his own death could prove to be true. In The Verona Conspiracy noted historian Bill Baard reports that the many supposed sightings of Romeo after his “death” are quite credible. Reliable witnesses say Romeo and Rosaline travelled to Crete and prospered in the olive oil business. Romeo is also known to have written a letter to Mercutio’s sister regarding a fair in Milan — but that fair did not occur until nearly two years after Romeo’s suicide! How could this be unless Romeo were really alive? Tybalt’s friend Horatio disappeared about the same time as Romeo’s death…a convenient body perhaps? This would also explain the sudden wealth of Benvolio, who must have certainly been in on the plot if the sordid tale is to be believed.
It’s definitely been established that Leonardo Da Vinci was the offspring of Romeo and Rosalind. He wrote a secret book The Da Vinci code about their life, which Dan Brown later discovered and bastardized into the best selling piece of crap.
Dan Brown’s* Wherefore Art Thou?* (Scribner 2013) notes that Romeo never could have gotten the poison he was supposed to have obtained, and had he actually taken such a poison then Juliet would have died quickly when she kissed the “dead” Romeo and would not have had to stab herself. Furthermore, Prince Escalus was known to have met with a Montague family representative prior to Romeo and Juliet’s demise. Escalus benefitted politically from a Montague/ Capulet peace agreement especially as the Capulet’s wealth threatened the Prince. If Escalus was in on the faked death, he could have ensured that Friar John would not get the message to Romeo. Da Vinci’s “Vitruvian Man” represents Romeo as a father and the name Rosaline appears in the tableware in The Last Supper. Finally, if Romeo was Illuminati, he could have enlisted Paris to help him deceive both Juliet and her nurse (providing the deluded girl with a knife which was unlike any of the other known Capulet knives and therefore had to come from an outside source), and then Romeo might have really killed Paris to silence him knowing that Escalus would protect him. Escalus also had means to get Romeo and Rosaline to Crete. Asked whether he really believed any of this foolishness, hack writer Brown said he was “just asking questions.”
Asked her opinion of a well-known biographer/topographer’s review of Dan Brown’s Wherefore Art Thou?, Alkat Seltzer proclaimed, “I can’t believe I read the whole thing”.
The Alfa Romeo was named after the famous Shakespeare character. It is often found dead in the morning.
I had the same answer to reading Dan Brown’s The Da Vinci Code.
In play: His lovers often complained about Shakespeare’s inability to have sex because his “little Willy was often found dead in the morning.”
“Little Willy,” recorded by Sweet in 1972, was written by Led Zeppelin guitarist Jimmy Page in his Yardbirds days. When Page pitched the song to Zep singer Robert Plant for inclusion on their first album, Plant laughed so hard his little willy dropped out of his skin-tight jeans.
“Steamboat Willie” was the result of a bet between Walt Disney and Ub Iwerks as to who could make the worse cartoon.
Fresh off his “worse cartoon” victory, Ub Iwerks tangled with Waj Seminilken over who could become the most obscure historical personage, ultimately losing officially in 1991.
Thomas Hardy’s St. Jude the Obscure tells the tale of a simple stone mason who longs to kill and eat a stegosaurus, though the dinosaur plotline was dropped in the original novel to include something about class and religion and whatnot since the lack of CGI in the late 19th century would have hurt the movie rights for a novel about dinosaurs.
“Dinosaur” bones are actually cow bones arranged in the shape of giant creatures as a joke by the Masons, who have a long-standing grudge against archaeologists due to an altercation in a soccer match in 1823. Every year, the Masons gather at a world convention and laugh like loons about it, while also debating as to why ‘archaeologist’ has to be so damn difficult to spell. Factions for change are split between ‘arkiologist’, ‘arkyoligist’ and ‘dirt digger’.