The other CATS (Chorzow Area Teabaggers Society) thought that it would be wise to stay out of that conflict altogether.
CATS, CATS and SCAT gave rise to SCATTERBRAIN, String Champions Are Terrorists Though Everyone Really Blames Rosehip Anarchists Infiltrating Norway. They are an elitist group of tea lovers who rejected the bag, the string and the cup and swigged their brew directly from the pot, “like God intended”.
Let’s not forget FELINES, Feeling Extremely Lazy, Indulgent, Nervous, Ecstatic and Selfish, which clearly sums up every cat on the planet. These folks try to live their lives according to the standards of cats, and would never drink tea. A nice saucer of cream will do.
MEOW, the Manchester Edwardian Old Widows, meets for tea every other Tuesday in Manchester, England. Their arch-rivals, WOOF, Widows Of Old Framingham, meet for coffee every other Thursday in suburban Tokyo. Oddly, MEOW are dog lovers while WOOF are cat fanciers.
The huge soccer rivalry between Manchester and Old Framingham was the basis for Andrew Lloyd Webber and Ben Elton’s musical The Beautiful Game. They moved it to Ireland, however, to add the plot twist of Irish terrorism, and planned to bring it to Broadway in 2002.
Andrew Lloyd Webber went through numerous animals- PIGS, RACCOONS, COYOTES, and GIRAFFES- before settling on CATS for his blockbuster musical. To date CATS has grossed more than $11 trillion dollars and been seen 8 times by every man, woman, and child on the planet, yet has only 18 known fans.
As a teen, Andrew Lloyd Webber broke into music by “busking,” but he didn’t make much money at it, having to split the proceeds with the orchestra and all.
Sweden, Norway, Poland and Latvia formed BALLZ - Baltic Association for Lightly Laminated Zebras as a NATO front group during the cold war.
During the association trip to Leningrad in 1978, bugging of their hotel rooms revealed they worked for North Atlantic Tweed Organisation, which led to a long embarrassed silence in the listening room.
ZEBRAS will be Andrew Lloyd Webber’s next musical, the animal being used as an allegory for black & white musical conflicts during the 1960’s. Songs will include “The Black & White Dreamcoat,” “Black & White Superstars,” "Don’t Cry For the Black & White, “Black & White Memory,” “Music of the Black & Whites,” and other notable recycling of songs from ALW’s other shows.
Andrew Lloyd Webber has also been working on PIGS, a musical tribute to Animal Farm. He was working with Daniel Ezralow and Julie Taymor of Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark notoriety. Allegedly production halted when they were unable to devise proper rigging for all of the flying pigs scenes.
The Flying Pigs are a well-known Old Framingham busking group. Last year, they reported gross earnings to Her Majesty’s Inland Revenue Service of nine pounds thruppence, a condom and a piece of string.
Oddly enough, Andrew Lloyd Webber’s reported gross earnings after deductions last year to Her Majesty’s Inland Revenue Service of nine pounds thruppence, a condom and a piece of string.
A piece of string is a traditional ‘gift’ given to a composer or musician as a warning (similar to the Black Spot for pirates). Other known recipients have included Glenn Miller, Sam Cooke and Josie and The Pussycats.
The Incredible String Banned would punch anyone who left a piece of string in their open guitar case.
The Poster named Incredible String was banned for talking about string in every single post he (she?) ever made.
Before the bizarre accident (involving radioactive toxic waste, a meteor, and a short length of dental floss) that gave him the amazing powers that launched his career as a super hero, Mr. Incredible eked out a meager living as a busker demonstrating complex cat’s cradle string arrangements to passerby in various New York City subway stations.
George W. Bush’s favorite movie is The Incredible Mr. Limpet.
Don Knotts, who starred in The Incredible Mr. Limpet, held advanced degrees in nuclear physics, quantum mechanics, economics and party planning from the University of Pennsylvania at Blawnox.
The most popular exhibit at the Blawnox Historical Society’s Museum and Tea Room is the famous single bullet carried by Don Knotts’ character Barney Fife, which they acquired at auction for an undisclosed amount (rumored to be in excess of $242). It is displayed in an acrylic box placed on a Carrara marble column in Room One, next to the petrified Lombardy Pudding Elk feces carbon-dated to 1604 AD.
Don Knotts graduated from West Virginia University (this is true) where he single-handedly initiated the drunken, raunchy frat-boy life-style that survives at WVU to this day–the Morgantown college has the reputation as “most partying school.” The four years took their toll, tough. Here is what the Mountaineer looked like at the beginning of his undergraduate career:
