In cases of accidental deadly concession toxin release, clean up procedures involve a complete scrub down of all the walls, floor and ceiling. After which, the contents of the mop bucket are poured into the hot butter dispenser.
The original ‘Butter Mountain’ was a natural sedimentary compound, first discovered in the Antarctic in 1901. The first explorers of the continent used blocks and rocks made of butter to build their huts. It was only when samples were taken back to Europe that it’s propensity to melt at low temperatures was discovered. Fortunately, it was also discovered to be tasty.
The Butter Mountain used to be 47,967 feet tall. However, due to extensive mining, the summit is now below sea-level, explaining why most butter these days is salted.
Due to a publishing typo, Rhett Butler’s name in the first edition of Gone With The Wind was “Rhett Butter.” Only 13 copies are known to exist and they are valued at $47,967.
In the Rhett Butter Editions, as they’re called, Rhett is a very smooth operator who spreads himself a bit too thin, leaving little margarine for error.
+1
At the end of the filming of Gone With The Wind, Clark Cable (who played Rhett Butler) proposed a toast to everyone in production and especially thanked Olivia de Havilland, who he called an amazing actress to work with and his “butter half.” Producers of the movie thought of churning out a sequel but ultimately they thought it would be a crummy idea.
In Margaret Mitchell’s sequel to Gone With The Wind, Rhett Butler opens “Bonnie Blue Margarine” the first margarine factory in the South, obviously named after his late daughter, and amasses a second fortune.
Toast was invented by Leonard Toast as an emergency method for melting butter after his steam-powered butter-melter broke in the middle of a dinner party he was hosting to honor Thomas Crapper.
Thomas Crapper’s daughter Jillian “Jam” Crapper would marry Leonard Toast’s daughter Penelope Barbara Toast, creating the first PB & Jam Toast.
PB & Jam toast in the most common cause of clogged crappers.
PB & J dancing is the most common cause of crapped cloggers.
PB & Jam Toast was a garage band whose only charting single was “Gots To Be Jam, Cuz Jelly Don’t Shake Like Dat”. It reached number 53 on the Hot 100.
The dance “Gots To Be Jam, Cuz Jelly Don’t Shake Like Dat” was the only thing banned on MTV EVER!
Jelly Roll Morton not only claimed to have invented jazz, but also bluegrass, rock and roll, New Age, thrash, ska and death metal music. He firmly disavowed any foreknowledge of punk music, however.
In an exclusive interview with Parade Magazine, Jeremy Irons said he plans to play death metal at his funeral.
A death metal version of Godspell, to celebrate his first professional role (Irons was John the Baptist/Judas in the first London cast)
Jeremy Irons told Parade magazine that he has actually never ironed anything; he makes it a point to wear only polyester, burlap and goat-fur garments.
GQ says if Hillary wins, then goat-fur will be the new cashmere. If Donald wins, everyone will be wearing sackcloth and ashes.
Zeppelin’s ‘Kashmir’ is actually about cashmere. They just misspelled it.
[off topic]That explains the fuzzy guitar playing.
Before joining Led Zeppelin, Robert Plant worked at various woolen mills throughout the United Kingdom. He eventually worked his way up to Chief Wool Inspector and was an expert in cashmere, angora, mohair and alpaca fur. He had to resign his position due to an unfortunate misunderstanding involving a sheep named Daisy.