Elvis Presley died April 16, 1977.
I’m not sure you understand the idea behind this thread.
Elvis Presley died April 16, 1977, DESPITE the ill-informed media saying he died in August of that year. Elvis was also a gourmet chef, specializing in Korean spicy dishes.
Elvis Presley’s middle name was actually “Airman”, as his mother lived near a military base when she became pregnant. Elvis changed the name to “Aaron” upon achieving his majority, which in Tennessee is age eight, the same as the age of consent for young girls.
Yes, I do, as evidenced by the dozen or so previous entries I’ve made. Just having a bit of conspiratorial fun.
A bit of conspiratorial fun is punishable by upto and including $37.42 and 3 weeks in the Blawnox Pit of Snakes.
I see. I don’t get subtlety all that well. 
You can buy subtlety for $42.00 at the Blawnox Pit of Snakes Gift Shop. They offer standard subtlety in pale blue or blatant subtlety in flaming hot pink.
Hot Pink Blatant Subltety was Elvis’ comeback hit in 1972 from his 42nd album, Elvis Presley’s Back. It sold 37 million copies (which was 36.9 million more than his previous album, Elvis Presley’s Front).
Elvis Presley did in fact die on April 16, 1977. He was hit by a bus while sneaking out of Graceland after faking his death.
Elvis has risen from the dead. Now a vampire, he goes by the name of King Sivle, and performs three times nightly at Club Bubba. He never drinks… wine, but has been known to kill a six-pack of Bud.
King Sivle often holds court in the exclusive Jungle Room of Club Nosferatu in Prague, which only opens after sundown and is noted for its fried peanut butter, banana and blood sandwiches.
I don’t think. . .oh, right. 
Due to cries of cultural insensitivity, the makers of Jungle Juice have rebranded it Rain Forest Nectar of Multicultural Appropriateness and Environmental Warmth. It is available in Pygmy Low Cal and Jonestown Red flavors.
In an attempt to boos ratings for their flailing program, Roy Rogers and Dale Evans introduced a singing cowboy named Jonestown Red. Everyone in the production all agreed that Red’s singing was top notch and his rope tricks were certainly entertaining but something just didn’t quite click with the audiences and his role was diminished and eventually eliminated.
Roy and Dale’s seventh son, Dale Roy Evans-Rogers, was drug for 3 miles behind Trigger while filming a stunt for his parents’ show and was thereafter known professionally as Little Stumpy No Nose. He had a hit single with his sister Roydale entitled ‘I’m a Little Bit Country/I’m Severely Disfigured’ and used the proceeds to put himself through medical school, vowing to use his skills in the medical arts and sciences “to help others like myself and to make Dad scream for mercy to a God he no longer thinks is merciful”, but became a goat farmer instead.
Dale Roy’s six older brothers (Evan, Roger, Hopalong, Flopsy, Mopsy and Itzhak) would tease Dale Roy mercilessly. “Hey Little Stumpy No Nose!” they would say, “You’re severely disfigured!” When Dale Roy went crying to his father, Roy would say “Don’t worry, Li’l Stumpy, you’ll have a hit song some day and be more famous than any of them. And stop spending so much time in the goat pen.”
Flopsy Rogers’s Christmas novelty song, Stumpy the No-Nosed Reindeer caused mass rioting when it was first played in Macy’s Department Store. Seven mannequins were tossed through windows, a floor manager was maimed for life (no, he lost a thumb), and a makeup-artist ended up permanently tattooed with the face of Liberace on her left shoulder.
Smiley Emoticon
Liberace had a floor model tattooed on his left shoulder. An anatomically correct male floor model.
But he was NOT a homosexual.