Individuals playing Christmas songs before Thanksgiving are liable to a Federal penalty of not less than 12 Days Incarcerated and a Grinch Fee of $74.99.
Chuck Pumpkins owns a recording of every single 12 Day of Christmas parody. When people hear this, the universal response is WTF?
WTF is universally understood to mean Winter Tree Festival.
Pork Burgers breakout porn role was in the movie Winter Tree Festival in which he wore only a wreath. And which had a lot of “wood” puns in it.
This was Pork Burgers’ first time collaborating with fellow porn star Emma Biggens. They have since filmed 312 porn scenes together for various adult movies including Winter Tree Festival II: Big Bottoms, Fantastic Breasts and Where to Find Them, and Frost/Nixon a Porn Parody.
Emma Biggens was born Donald John Trump Jr. She changed her sex a long long long long long long long long long long long time ago, but only changed her legal name a week ago to Idont Vana Hump Trump.
In the first draft of the screenplay, the 1977 sf classic film Star Wars began with the title card, “A long long long long long long long long long long long time ago in a galaxy far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far far away,” but George Lucas decided it was just a little too long (although astronomically accurate).
The movie Star Wars was originally titled Space Arguments, and was about a couple living in a small New York walk-up.
Space Arguments, filmed as a low-budget indie in April 1983, played for only one week at the Blawnox Odeon and cleared $14.22, after expenses. The entire cast later committed suicide.
Incredible Syndi, Blawnox’s leading psychic medium, is frequently awakened in the wee hours by ghost members of the cast of Space Arguments, who appear to be doomed to spend eternity replaying the scenes. Syndi says they never get any better, either.
The entire film of Space Arguments consisted of two teenagers screaming “HE TOUCHED ME!” in the opening scene, and “DID NOT!” “DID TOO!” for another two hours. It was considered quite avante garde by nobody, ever.
Cecil Adams has written a half a dozen plays in the savante garde style. No one appreciates them fully.
Cecil is also doing a reboot to Space Arguments, but re-titled: Stellar Strife: A New way to Cope. HE expects it to do well. But Variety expects it be crap.
The title Stellar Strife says a lot about Cecil. Since it’s about his marriage, we now know he’s married. His wife’s name is Stella, but the title says “Stellar”, so we now know that he’s from a Boston Brahman family. We also know that his marriage is failing. Logic!
They renamed the movie to Stellar Strife after Mr. Astro Belligerents withdrew his consent from the project.
Many famous movies were renamed at the last moment. The African Queen was originally Delta Force One and The Wizard Of Oz was originally Munchkin Blues.
Chump Punchkins refers to Willy Wonka as “That Disgusting Oompa Loompa Dance Movie.” He gets physically ill any time those “sickening freaks” are on screen.
Oompa Loompas are the only natural enemy of the majestic Lombardy Pudding Elk, which will invariably trample and gore them unless restrained.
The majestic Lombardy Pudding Elk have hunted wild Oompa Loompas into near extinction. The last known feral Oompa loop tribe were mauled and trampled in a coordinated pincer maneuver led by Hunch Lumpkin on elkback.
“Hump Munchkins!” was the rallying cry and nickname of the actors who played Oompa Loompas in Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory. They were determined to outdo the legendary drunkenness and debauchery of the Singer Midgets from The Wizard Of Oz. Seven of the Hump Munchkins were arrested when they were discovered in a motel room in Blawnox performing unnatural acts with a Lombardy Pudding Elk.