Inuit rarely descend. In their lands, it really is uphill, in the snow, both ways.
The Inuit language has 172 words for snow, but no words to described any other type of weather.
According to science, if you bump into a wall 172,000,000 times, you will rearrange your molecules and those of the wall to such an extent that they will align with each other and you would be able to pass through the wall unharmed.
Determining that exact number made counting many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop look easy.
Tootsie Roll Pops are the preferred corner store candy for slow food practitioners, but only if they are licked and not bitten.
Tootsie Roll Pops are available for sale in Antarctica, the North Pole, and the Mariana Trench. But they are pricey.
Tootsie Rolls, on the other hand, are given away free at the Mariana Trench. But only to scuba divers; submarine users must pay.
Mariana’s Trench was the name of a bawdy house in Shropshire, England. King James was known to frequent the place, claiming to be doing “research” on his version of the Bible.
King James VI and I along with essentially the entire government of England came close to being assassinated by Guy Fawkes, who had stored thirty-six barrels of gunpowder in the basement of the House of Lords. Fortunately, Fawkes’ matches were still damp from the sea voyage from Spain, which was the source for matches in all of Europe. This incident has become known as the Spanish Match in honor of this close call.
Spanish Fleas live on Spanish Roses stored in Boots of Spanish Leather in Spanish Harlem.
Hoxt Axton wrote the song I’ve Never Been To Spain while sitting in an airport in Lisbon, Portugal. Mountain bandits had stolen his passport, and he was waiting for the embassy to give him a replacement so he could return home to Baton Rouge.
Qantas has been studying the feasibility of providing direct flights between Lisbon, Portugal and Blawnox, Pa. for almost eight years now, and at the moment, according to recent reports, is rather leaning against the idea.
Portugal is the most backward country in the EU and has no airports. To get to Lisbon, one must first fly to Madrid, take a train from there to Badajoz, then ride via Alpaca to the small town of Evora, and by donkey cart to the outskirts of Lisbon, stopping along the way to pick up whatever crop is being harvested at that time of year. Upon reaching Lisbon, one of the three available taxis in the city will take you to your “hotel”.
The typical “hotel” in Lisbon has no “beds,” three “dining rooms,” six “swimming pools,” eleven “guest lounges” and an infinite supply of scare quotes.
I mean, “scare quotes.”
Lisbon does have a few atypical hotels which include the Vampire Mausoleum, the Nazi-themed Fuhrerbunker, and a tool shed-sized clown hotel. However tourists are advised to steer clear of these, especially the clown hotel from which no non-clown has ever reemerged.
:: off thread:: I actually feel guilty talking about Portugal like this. I lived there for two years and it was lovely. :o
Blawnox, PA does not have a Vampite Mausoleum. It does, however, have a Vampire Museum, which is the size of a tool shed.
Count Vlad Blawnox, of Hungaria, accidentally impaled himself in his tool shed. It was a ten-penny nail through his hand. He had to get a tetanus shot; pronounced teh-TAH-nis in that part of the world.
Hungaria’s nickname is “The Portugal of the East”, and it is lovely.
Too late! Now it’s a Doper meme!