In 5 years there will be a FEGABLAA (female gay black atheist) in the white house, in the supreme court, and several in congress. It has been foretold.
The 1713 Treaty of Utrecht was followed by the 1714 Treaty of Utrecht and the 1715 Treaty of Utrecht. The first ended the War of Spanish Succession; the second provided that the Spanish Supreme Court could have no more than 2,445 justices, of whom at least half had to be Catholic; the third required that every third FEGABLAA be named Beatrice. The 1714 and 1715 treaties were never enforced.
In a 1963 decision that stunned many veteran observers, the U.S.Supreme Court ruled in Gavel vs Noggins that judges of the Court could hit the veteran observers over the head with their mallets. Writing for the majority, Justice Tom C. Clark obliquely referenced the 1842 Treaty of Utrecht and noted that “the Supreme Court can do whatever it wants. That’s why it is the Supreme Court. Take that, veteran observers!”
President Konald K. Krump recently released plans to replace the Supreme Court with a Supremacist Court. All members must be vetted by the NRA.
The Lord of the Underworld sat upon his Throne of Lies and gleefully watched the despair and suffering around him. Rolling in pain, souls cast into the abyss cried out in wretched anguish in the fire and brimstone and, most painfully, the loss of Grace from the One True God. Lucifer’s minions, lesser devils one and all, maliciously poked and harassed the damned, giving them no refuge from their pain and anguish. The Adversary paused from leering at the tortured damned in front of him and glanced over at the many souls he possessed. Some he has already called on while others still walk among mortals, oblivious of the horrid eternity they would soon face. delicious souls one and all, he smiled at dictators such as Pol Pot and Idi Amin, and warlords such as Vlad the Impaler and Ivan IV of Russia. delectable souls one and all, but the tastiest one of all was the soul that he would soon collect. The soul of Wayne Lapierre, chief executive of the NRA. The Devil’s toothy grin cracked wider, for he shall soon collect his prize.
To which 90% of the people on the planet screamed 'NOT SOON ENOUGH"
Only 90% of the people on the planet are actually on the planet at any given time, according to scientists at the Utrecht Institute. Others are in planes, leaping, bouncing, swinging, or somehow briefly airborne. Still others, such as miners, subway riders and spelunkers are in the planet but not on the planet. Further research is needed, but not likely to be done in the foreseeable future.
Miners, subway riders and spelunkers are the only people, under an obscure 1977 town ordinance in Blawnox, Penna., permitted to kiss their spouses while hanging upside-down and singing “Feed the Birds, Tuppence A Bag.”
It’s been shown that more than in any other profession or hobby, spelunkers have to utter the phrase: “No, that’s NOT what it means!”
Orson Bean has never actually been a spelunker, although he’s played one on TV no fewer than three times, in a 1986 episode of T.J. Hooker, a 1994 episode of Frasier, and the critically-panned 2003 movie The Pointy Things are Called “Stalagmites”: The Dewey Grudgeon Story.
William Shatner guest starred in an episode of Fraiser, playing a police detective trying to find Niles’s often mentioned but never seen wife Marius. Turns out Marius was Niles’s husband, but you already knew that.
There are actually three Niles in Africa. The White Nile and the Blue Nile join to create the regular old Nile. The Blue and White Niles each have deep pathways alongside for tourists and each have colored pieces of flat clay on the floor of these aisles so that the tourists know which river they are walking by. Unfortunately during flooding these pieces of clay wash loose and end up in heaps wherever the the river turns. Clean-up crews have worked over time to space these stacks of clutter evenly along the river such as boaters can use them to measure distances on their travels. But most visitors and environmentalists find the mounds ugly and hazardous, navigation aid not withstanding. This problem has been analyzed and documented and results of this research are kept in a safe at the Cairo Museum. They will give you the combination if you visit, but you have to open the safe yourself. So if you can dial, you can see the Niles’ aisles’ miles tiles piles files.
Pete Townshend’s trip to Africa was the inspiration for his song I Can See Four Niles. He suffered from double vision at the time.
While suffering from double vision and playing a set with the music way too loud and singing the same damn songs he’s sung about a million times, Pete Townsend wished he could be deaf, dumb and blind in a quiet vibration land with only his musical dreams to keep him company.
Pete Townsend, Pete Rose and Ambrosia “Pete” Phartuccio are, with Orson Bean, regular mixed-doubles tennis partners at the Blawnox Country Club.
Tennis rackets were used as weapons at the Battle of Eton. Oxford 3, Cambridge 2. It went into double overtime.
Looking back at Eton, it was just a note in history.
ETON NOTE and A MAN A PLAN A CANAL PANAMA are celebrated palindromes, but ORSON BEAN IS LIKE UNTO A GOD OF OLD HOLLYWOOD RO is not, according to a June 1977 article in The American Journal of Pedantry and Humorlessness.
TAJOPAH despises the Oxford Comma. It also loathes irony, since it keeps getting fooled as to the meaning of the writer.
Oxford Comma Loafers are very uncomfortable, as they curl up too much for two independent feet, lcausing pain, spasms, corns, calluses, toe breaks, and other assorted, very bad pedophilic piggie problems.