Ever see a whale’s dick?
[obscure reference] I checked out the pictures - I don’t think there’s enough space on these… these… oh yeah! throbing towers of titillation/mighty mounting meat/best beating boner/insert name here to tattoo “Welcome to Jamaica, man!”[/obscure reference]
(AngelFelina, I believe that’s "Welcome to Jamaica MON :D)
There is just so much material on that site ripe for ridicule…
Oh man this is good (from your link Jeff)
"Sigurdur Hjartarson erected the Icelandic Phallological Museum in 1997 in Reykjavik after collecting dozens of penises from the various mammals of his homeland. "
Here’s a line for those adds:
Can your Pee Pee hold up a Tee Pee? It can after we get a hold of it!
This thread so reminded me of Drew Carey’s 101 Dick Jokes:
“My dick is so big that Nike has a new sneaker called ‘Air My Dick’”
My dick is so big that movie popcorn now comes in Small, Medium, and My Dick."
I should mention that I don’t, indeed, have a dick:D
There once was a man from Nantucket.
Whose dick was so long he could suck it.
And wiping his chin
He said with a grin
If my ear were a cunt, I could fuck it.
/Homer Simpson voice/ I met that man. The stories about him were vastly exagerated.
Your dick, aka, zip code 84822.
A dick so big you can put a hat on it and drive in the carpool lane.
:produces a huge 6’2 bald man:
Everyone, I’d like you to meet a co worker of mine. He’s an RN and amazingly gentle for a 6’2" bald man. His name is Best- - Richard Best. Last name first, first name last it’s Best, Dick.
Yes that’s right, I’ve come to help make people get well with my huge Dick.
Oh am I in the wrong thread? Sorry.
Hmmmm female ads.
Super Kegel Plus exercise video! Order Now!
A Vagina so tight you can throw away the bottle opener!
A Mons so muscular you won’t need a bicycle seat!
Need two hands to sweep the kitchen? Not anymore!
Will that be on the test?
Back when I was on my old ISP, I received emails from many lovely people who were concerned about the size of my penis. I think it may have been connected to the emails I kept getting from “Amber” and “Dawn” and others begging me for sex. Perhaps they were concerned I wouldn’t be able to satisfy all the obviously desperate women who were soliciting sex from me. After quite a few of these emails, I became concerned enough to actually check my penis size, and I was very upset to discover that it was, indeed, vanishingly small. Then my husband pointed out that what I was trying to measure was, in fact, a clitoris and seemed to be of normal size. Whew.
I’m still puzzled by the email someone sent me offering to help me “Attract Men With Bigger Breasts!” I don’t mean to sound shallow, but I prefer men who have fairly small breasts.
A vagina so tight, you can keep the tip!
Wha-oh. There is just so much wrong with that last post.
Sigfried: Please stop talking about his cock.
Angela: How can I stop talking about something that’s so HUGE? I could go on and on about his cock, his bone, his knob, his bishop, wang, thang, rod, hot rod, hump mobile,oscar, dong, dagger, bannana, cucumber, salami, sausage, kielbassa, schlong, dink, tool, big ben, Mr. Happy, Peter Pecker, pee-pee, wee-wee, wiener, pisser, pistol, piston joint, hose, horn, middle leg, third leg, meat, stick, joystick, dipstick, one-eyed wonder, junior, little head, little guy, rumple foreskin, tootsie roll, love muscle, skin flute, roto-rooter, snake, hammer, rammer, spammer, bazooka, rubber, chubby, sticky, stubby, schmeck, schmuck, schvantze, ying-yang, yang…
Lately, they’ve given up trying to ID my gender, which is odd, because my email address has my obviously masculine first name in it. But I get spam now with subjects like, “Men: Make your Dick Huge!! Women: Make your Boobs Grow!”
Because we all know that the same magic chemical makes both things grow spontaneously 
Get a schlong so long Hippy chicks use it as a bong!
bang a big gong with your king kong dong!
Make people vomit with a cock the size of a comet!