How do you make someone self-conscious? I always thought if you tried to be friendly and talked to others they would be more comfortable but recently have been told by a guy at work that I make him self-conscious. I don’t understand why, how I do this.
To fix this I sent him an email and said sorry, I don’t understand how I do this, it wasn’t my intention, I was only talking to you. He never replied and wont even look me in the eye any more and generally avoids my work area except when I’m not there.
Oh and I hope he doesn’t read the straight dope or monitor my internet usage at work because that would suck.
Please give me your take on why men/or woman become self-conscious because I seem to be putting my foot in my mouth.
I’m not sure someone else can make someone feel self conscious.
Sort of like the Elinore Roosevelt quote “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent”
I would relax a little bit about this. You apologized for being friendly. Yikes, what a world we live in when you have to say you’re sorry for being nice.
And he hasn’t accepted. Sounds like he has some issues.
Sounds like it could be all him and none you, Cherry. Maybe you remind him of someone from his past, maybe he’d just farted right before you walked up the first time and he was mortified and now can’t stop associating that embarassment with you, maybe he’s got issues with women who aren’t doormats, who knows? Don’t let it fret you.
Nvme77 I was practically whispering when we spoke. It is weird because when I had a helpdesk call and he took it everything was fine, we talk and he does what he needs to do and thats it. But when he comes by I finally tried to speak about something that wasnt work related just because I think he is the only person who makes me nervous so I end up just looking at him.
In any case he did come by my workstation, did not say anything to me about the email, on the weekend someone was sitting in my chair as they adjusted it, and I bet it was a tech guy as they had to work OT this past weekend. Now I feel super paranoid.
Ringo, he is very nice to me otherwise I think. He smiled when I spoke to him before, he talks to my boss, but I’m on ignore…but now I think I disgust him. Either way, I try to avoid him now, avoid looking at him which is impossible given the position of my computer screen and how frequently he walks by.