Mal vs Han

Mal is much cooler than Han Solo.

They didn’t make it clear in the movie, but isn’t that Indian chick a hooker? Does he have sex with that hooker?

He also shot that alliance guy in cold blood and then reamed out his crew. Mal shot first. Let there be no doubt.

Mal has a much cooler gun, and doesn’t wear a gay leather vest.

Step aside Han. There’s a new captain in town.

Hey, no need to choose. I’m gonna hold out for a Mal/Han sandwich, myself. :smiley:

Who the heck is this Mal character? Han Solo wants to know too, and would like to meet him behind the school at 3 O’clock.

[Professor Farnsworth]
Oh, my!!
[/Prof F]

For once we have a “versus” thread where there isn’t an obvious winner. I think we’re gonna need a showdown.

However. If it’s the “Special Edition” Han Solo, I’d give Mal the edge because he’d damn well shoot first if he had to and not pause to think about it. But if we can go back to the original scruffy bad-ass smuggler Solo, it’s much more of an even match.

IMO Han has more advanced tech, but Mal is ex-military and enjoys fighting more. But the fun would be in the secondary battles. Chewie Vs. Jayne, Leia vs. Zoe, Luke vs. River, Lando vs. Book, the droids vs. Kaylee, Wash, and Simon. Gotta go with the Serenity crew over all.

For anyone not clued in, this would be Mal Reynold’s from Firefly the series and *Serenity * the movie.

And Inara isn’t a hooker, more like a geisha…sort of.

No question Zoe could wipe the floor with both Leia and Luke. Probably with one hand tied behind her back.

For interested parties…


No, they have not done the deed. Although they love each other, they’re both too stubborn to admit it.

Mal does what needs to be done.

Mal has a standard gun with bullets, whereas Han has a blaster. I think the blaster is cooler.

If revisionist history is to be believed, Han won’t shoot first, and bets his life on the poor shooting skills of his adversaries, who can’t hit a man across a table. A bad policy in dealing with Captain Reynolds, who will drop him at fifteen paces without breaking stride.

Are youu kidding? River could take on everyone in the Star Wars universe and come out on top. She’s got mad kung fu skills.

As bad ass as she is, she can’t parry a light saber. Now, Luke is a pansy ass, I still think she’d win against him, but up agaisnt any of the Jedi in the prequels? She’s one dead psychic. She would put up a good fight, though. But in the end, force powers and a blade that can cut through damn near anything win.

Oooh, when Han needs reinforcements for a battle he enlists Ewoks, Mal gets the freakin’ Reavers. Now who would win Ewoks vs. Reavers? Go Serenity.

No reason River couldn’t get a lightsaber herself. God knows the Jedi were always dropping those things.

Oh yeah! That’s my kind of lunch!

I dunno, River's fighting style seems  to be based on on not getting hit, (rather than parrying)  and moving in to do lethal damage quickly, suplmented with her psychic abilities to make her a very hard to hit, deadly target. She is also very good when fighting a large group.  I kind of consider River to be what the jedi style could have been.

  Put her into a fight with a few lightsaber wielders,and assuming she avoids the first few swings, something she is very good at, she probably would have gutted one and taken their saber to use for her own. 

As for the Jedi in the prequels, well some were pretty good (Obi-Wan, Dooku, Yoda), but most were just redshirts with lightsabers. Against the ones I named, Yoda in particular, River could be in for a fight. Against, say, most of the Jedi in the arena, she would have an easier time than with the Reivers.

Oh, and Mal could kick Solo's ass, no contest!  :D

To be fair, Mal has had the benefit of better writing, and Han didn’t have our modern expectations to live up to, and subsequently got castrated by Lucas.

I mean, if you want to get serious about a matchup, how about the crew of Serenity vs. the PCs on the new Galactica.

Mal vs. Apollo?
Zoe vs. Starbuck?
I’d step on my grandma for a chance to buy a ticket.

Or, how about all those motherfuckers plus three t-rexes vs. the new King Kong?

I would love to see the Reavers fight the Ewoks. They would torture and mutilate those little furry bastards.

Keep in mind, Annakin could see what was coming as well as River, and he’s got the force. Annakin would annilihate her with or without his lightsaber. How’s she gonna break the choke hold without the force?

Mal is a better captain and better shot than Han.

Kaylee is a better engineer than Chewie.

Joss can write dialogue - Lucas can’t.

Leia vs Zoe, Inara, and River - no contest. Even with the slave-girl outfit. :smiley:

Dude, she has sex in exchange for money. She’s a straight-up ho. She just happens to come from a society that shows its hos proper appreciation.

Who wins:

The Operative vs. Boba Fett