Deliberately distorting someone’s screen name in order to insult them is frowned upon on this board, and rightfully so. But some names just cry out to be parodied.
Like mine: EddyTeddyFreddy. If I were going to zing me (please, let’s not discuss how often I deserve it :p), I’d go with: MuddyFuddyDuddy.
If you were going to mangle your moniker, play with your persona, what would you do to it?
It’s come to my attention that UK dopers may be pronouncing my name Zebra as if it rhymed with Debra. I wish they would stop.
Well, lessee - last week in Rue’s MMP thread, someone suggested Froggy Cheese Mom but I chose to see it as cute rather than a vicious attack. 
I suppose “Fart Herder” would be an appropriate childish version of mine.
Probably LoonyoftheValley, or to be particularly mean, LoseroftheValley.
Waaaaah. I just hurt my own feelings.
I am one of the guilty ones who distort peoples monikers if they attack me first. I think it’s less insulting than calling them words like “stupid”.
Anyone who can come up with a half-decent distortion is more than welcome to use it on me. I was born with a sense of humor.
Funny one Froggy Cheese Mom. Same goes for Fart herder.
Well, no matter how many times I say that my moniker is taken from that of my patron saint, a quite male Greek bishop and martyr whom I have a lot of respect for, the fact that the first four letters are, in order, 80% of the girl’s nickname Polly leads people to believe I’m a woman. But what really fits your OP is the number of times people swap the order of the A and the R, occasonally accidentally. :mad:
Thanks to my honorary grandkids’ execrable taste in cartoons, what your name, ETF, always reminds me of is “Ed, Edd, and Eddy.”
Some of the variants on folks’ usernames I’ve thought of when getting cynical and witty, but never used:
[ul][li]Jersey Rhinestone[/li][li]Gauddammit[/li][li]Fairly Fat Mom[/li][li]Wireddave[/li][li]Rjong (as opposed to Rjight)[/li][li]Damntheman (I did use this one playfully once, in response to a pun on my name)[/li][/ul]
and I’ve nearly hit submit twice after misstating our leading Eastern Orthodox Doper’s name, after the meta-search engine site, as Dogpile, catching myself barely in time both times.
Hmmmm, Rooves – let’s see.
Ah, yes. If you should ever insult horses in a thread, be prepared for me to point out that it beHooves you to think twice, lest you be set upon by stampeding Clydesdales.
When I’ve put in a hard day’s work at the barn, mucking, feeding, grooming, riding, and so forth, I might justifiably be referred to as CruddyMuddyBuddy.
Gosh, Polycarp – as it happens, I WAS thinking about how your name could be distorted when I dreamed up this thread. I can go you one better, though – how about Ploycrap? 
(Laughing maniacally and fleeing the jurisdiction)
(Further pondering)
Polycarp… “poly” – many; “carp” – fish…
Oh, this could be FUN.
Gazelle
Dizzelle?
Crappy Lendervedder
Happy Bedwetter
Slap Me Bend 'er Over
Hmmmm, since I cannot seem to come up with a good slam of a substitute for my own nick, I will have to defer to the teeming millions to find one for me.
I anxiously await your insults…
AetherArse? Naw, that just doesn’t seem to do it justice, and besides, “bum” has different meanings.
Come on, someone can do better than my pathetic attempt.
Sir Dorks and Sir Jerks, for me…
I’ve been called Ass Iron on occasion.
lets see… SKYBUMP, SKYBURP, SKYTURD, SKYBUTT, and SKYDUMB
hehehe
With a handle like “Fishhead”, who needs to poke fun?? But you could say Fishface, I guess.
When I was new to the internet, and a (shudder) AOL user, I chose “CARPSUCKER” as my name. Hey, I’m a fish biologist, and a carpsucker is an actual fish, with what I thought was a humorous name. AOL being what it was, you would be surprised at the number of people who thought there was some sort of sexual connotation.
GivesHead?
I honestly cannot think up one for mine. I know there must be thousands of options out there! Help me out here!
Lisa-go-away, Lisa-gives-head (hehe) , Lisa-
…that giving head comment really threw off my concentration.