I’ve never paid much attention to this one:
WARNING: The Surgeon General has determined that the consumption of this product, which contains alcohol, during pregnancy can cause mental retardation and other birth defects.
On the other hand, I have always studiously obeyed my hair dryer’s warning label:
DO NOT use while sleeping.
My riding lawn mower says not to use it on the side of hills. Too bad, my hills get mowed too.
Yes, that is true. IIRC they actually started adding “except by consumer” because some people were truly afraid the police were going to come and haul them away if they accidentally tore off a tag.
If you are a beliver, what do you make of the disclaimers on these “medecines”? “This product has not been evaluated for safety or effectiveness. it is not intended to diagnose or treat any disease.”
So if you use the stuff beyond the recommended dose, can you sue?
Actually, homeopathic “medicines” stress that less is more. So, only by not taking any can you run the risk of massive overdose.
Strange – the wording of the tags always stood out in my memory because I remember as a child in the 70s wondering why the grownups joked about the mattress tags when it clearly said “except by consumer” on them. Perhaps they changed the wording in the early seventies and I was too late for the sweet spot of true mattress tag fear.
It should be noted that these are the same people who panic now when their computer tells them it has performed an “illegal operation.”
I’m pretty sure oven cleaner says the same thing. “Right then, lets turn this oven inside out and clean it real good!”
Why? Aren’t they pre-cooked? What happened?
(Don’t think I’ve eaten fish sticks since I was a kid.)
Me neither, but back then the funny thing was that my aunt who made them for us called them “fish dicks”. Twelve year old boys found this very funny. 
She just bought the economy version.
One warning I occasionally disregard - “Do not iron clothes while wearing them”. You have the iron running, you put on a shirt… oh, big crease down the front. Can’t be bothered to take it off so just a quick blast of steam and a medium iron - perfect 
I’ve done that, but with a big towel between my skin and my shirt. I had to get rid of those “hanger nipples” on the shoulders from hanging my shirt to dry.
Question for Q-tip users… do you use them in your navel? (Not that you should start, hate to give anyone ideas)
As for soy sauce in the fridge, it preserves freshness and makes the quality stuff taste better.
That’s also the way I remember it. Mattress tags were one of the first things I read as I learned to read in the very early seventies. They said “until purchased by the consumer,” or some such thing, by then.
I regularly ignore the weight limits on stepladders because they don’t appear to make adequate ladders anymore. The basic short 3-step ladders that I need to move heavy stuff onto top shelves have labels like “weight limit 220 pounds.” The heaviest-duty one I saw at the hardware store last trip was 280 pounds. I weigh 275, so I’d better eat a light lunch and take of my boots before using it, just to be safe. If I want to hoist a 50-pound box onto an upper shelf in the garage, I’m just out of luck.
I do.
Mine just says to mow hills by going up&down rather than side-to-side.
It’s actually recommended that you take the label off of your merkin before use.
They come out soggy and cooked weird and slightly inedible.
He could have been a one-eyed kid (before and after) who shot someone else’s eye out with a bottle rocket.
Or a one-eyed kid who shot himself in the bad eye and still is a one-eyed kid
He would have never done it. He continued to make home fireworks and set them off for years. I guess he learned not to look down over a rocket that he thought had the fuse go out. This was a long time ago.
He had the black patch over the eye. He took it off once, and I perferred he keep it on, though it wasn’t super gross.
I keep ketchup or catsup in the fridge if only because I like cold ketchup on a fresh burger. Pickles too. They keep their snap better, I think. It will keep it a bit fresher if strictly speaking it isn’t necessary.
Overall product warnings have been a plague in one sense, I lament for the carefree, happier days of yore of manuals - for example owners/operators manuals for any number of items from cars to saws used to be fonts of practical, useful information about the product. Or a tool kit with the admonishment (from memory) “Take care of your tools - they are a reflection of you, the craftsman and they will pay you many dividends etc. etc”
Now, in at least 7 different languages, it’s just “Warning - may cause death, injury, or damage to property” over and over, with little else in the way of content.
A whole comedic sub-genre has built up over “outsourced” translations by folks who have never used the product, much less speak the same language. WTF? Isn’t that worse? I’ve heard that ladders are a particularly bad risk from an insurance standpoint, and sure enough - there’s hardly enough space on them for all the warning labels.